


Jakku Beach

by LostInQueue



Category: Star Wars
Genre: A/O Dynamics, AU, Alpha/Omega, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Armitage Lifeguard, Assault, Beating, Ben Solo Lifeguard, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Ben Solo as a teenager, Ben Solo helps kids, Ben Solo saves Rey, Ben Solo virgin Alpha, Coast Guard, Confused ben solo, F/M, Fame, Feels, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Food, Fundraiser, Gen, Homecoming, Homelessness, Jakku Beach, Love, Lust, Mild Smut, Multi, Near Death Experience, Nicknames, Partnership, Relationship(s), Rey Kenobi Pro Surfer, Rey Kenobi as a kid, Rey explains her past, Rey writes to Ben solo, Reylo - Freeform, Reylo is a thing, Rivalry, Star Wars TLJ - Freeform, Stress, Summer, Surfing, Swimming, Tabloids, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Virgin Ben Solo, Virgin Rey, alphas attacking omegas, camping out, child endangerment, competitions, dealing with stress, first Aid Center, flattery, friends helping friends, life guards, ocean lifeguarding, parental arguments, parenting, rey Kenobi virgin omega, surfing terms
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-06-19 10:31:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 61,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15508089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostInQueue/pseuds/LostInQueue
Summary: Rey Kenobi is a prodigy surfer, exposed in at a dare surfing at fourteen in a competition held every year, meant for adults, called ‘Mile 5’. She’s swept into fame immediately and in time has to leave Jakku Beach, her home and friends for her safety.Six years later, her manager, Mrs. Holdo, needs to return to take care of her family, throwing Rey the idea of going back to Jakku, hoping she can pick up where she left off.





	1. Coming Home

**Author's Note:**

> This story popped into my head while writing the other one. Sometimes you just have to stop and work things out. :)
> 
> This has taken on a different direction all together since finishing ‘Rey’s Mechanics, and ‘Triggered’. 
> 
> This is an A/O doc and Rey is a prodigy pro surfer at the age of 14, well before she is ready to present. She handles high levels of stress, after her attack and having to leave her friends, including Solo, behind which took a large toll on her throughout these years.
> 
> To help her refocus, and manage herself, Mrs. Holdo, her manager, harps on her to keep a journal. This is very unusual to Rey who thinks she just needs an outlet.
> 
> They find out eventually that stress has been damaging her glands, pushing out presenting to a later date. Rey has to deal with the emotional side of losing it while she’s still on the circuit, finally deciding to see if a return to Jakku Beach and the people that live there are the key to her makeup.
> 
>  
> 
> *Disclaimer: I have guarded everything but the ocean.*
> 
> I have this set just for the sake of the story, and not for any other reason to falsify what happens as an ocean guard. Your jobs are important and every beach going patron appreciates your sacrifices. Or should.
> 
> Chapter 3 has raised the rating. Also this took an unexpected turn. Sorry, not sorry. Tags will be added soon. 
> 
> Just a heads up, there’s quite a bit of coupling between Ben and Rey 2-5, pertaining to getting reacquainted and such. Sorry if this is t your thing but for the sake of the foundations of the story, it’s required up front. <3
> 
>  
> 
> As always thanks for reading <3

[](https://ibb.co/dWQjCK)

Jakku Beach is gorgeous. It’s home to the most beautifully sculpted seascapes of it’s time. The ten mile stretch that is guarded for tourists and the public alike has multiple escapes for all to enjoy. The north and south ends are for fishing and strictly off limits for any swimming for obvious reasons. It’s a small section that is carved out for the local businesses that offer ‘Catch of The Day’ specials and are littered with lobster traps and nets far off the coast. These areas are usually guarded by the Coast Guard even though swimmers shouldn’t be present there are some tourists that can’t seem to read.

The remaining nine mile stretch is carved out in a bell curved reef towards the center with ample swimming space for athletes, excellent surfing out past the reef and in towards the beach on either side. People journey from all over to witness this gorgeous place. In the shallows, corals and tropical fish are visible at a glance as if they were under glass. The water is crystal blue as far as the eye can see. Cerulean blue waves crash over the reef’s edge, beckoning bathers of all kinds to try swimming in them. Wildlife was always present but with the technical advances they’d been able to keep sharks at bay far past the reef with an electronic force field that has been in short range test on surf boards for years. While no sharks had been able to come within range, other creatures would. It had become a hugely successful beach to visit.

Lifeguards had to be within the elitist athletes, strong swimmers, dedicated to the people, during long demanding hours. Perks to working as a Jakku Beach Ocean Guard were that you’d live seaside in the apartments behind the Guard ‘Shack’ at a discounted rate, they were paid, like a normal job with a salary, and it wasn’t weird to be an older guard. Most would move on to the Coast Guard too so if you were in it, you were in a family of sorts.

Jakku Beach also harbored an intriguing young lady named Rey Kenobi. Although she was too young to apply as an ocean guard, she was certainly strong enough to keep up with them at the age of fourteen. This would be the same year that she’d be exposed to the world as the next upcoming sensation in the sport of professional of surfing.

It has been the heart of the coast ever since the young surfer renamed it Tatooine Shores, trying to escape the public eye. People would go just to see if they could find her, and at first it was an innocent act, looking for autographs or a picture with her. Until one day someone outright assaulted her in the shower stalls, grabbing for anything of hers. The story had been all over the news, looking for the perpetrator that had single handily chased their legend from their shores.

Reports poured in that she had been going home at her usual time alone instead of with her usual crowd to meet her Aunt who happened to be in the area.

‘Rey, fourteen year old surfer prodigy, has been the victim of an aggravated assault and robbery of her personal items, including clothing and unmentionables in a shower stall at Jakku Beach. Ms. Kenobi, is currently seeking refuge among friends upon her recovery and made mention to leaving Jakku forever.’ The pictures in the tabloids are of replaced items she described were lost now to her, like her loose sunflower yellow crop top, sandals and daisy printed pajama shorts she would wear every where, underwear and bathing suit. She also claimed to have lost her white visor that she admitted to using to glance up from sitting in the sand to the lifeguard stand to ‘sneak peaks’ at them.

All of these things had a lesser importance to her than a tiny picture sleeve she would keep safely hidden within the lining of her bag, well underneath her towel and food. No one knew of this but her. Even riffling through it would prove useless, as it wasn’t an obvious pocket. Her pictures were the only reminders of her life that used to be stable. A picture of Rose and her on their boards and faces scrunched side by side together giving peace signs. Another one of her flying off of her board in one of her first lessons right before she fell on Finn, his face was priceless. She has a picture of the other upcoming surfers, Jessika, Connix, Poe and her. The last few were pictures she stole from the lifeguard picture board of a boy she liked when Mr. Skywalker would open the shack. He knew she was doing it. It was part of the reason he would keep putting them up there. It was his way of keeping tabs she thought.

After the whole ordeal she searched each stall for a towel, finding a child size squeegee towel divers used and her bag, she ripped the lining out and made a makeshift skirt and wrap for her chest out of toilet paper in the stalls across the way. Bracing herself, she’d tried telling herself she would be safe to walk back down to the beach to grab a towel from the back of the guard chair before leaving for home. No such luck though as she locked eyes with Ben, the guard she had the biggest crush on even though he was six years older than her, coming from the locker room across the path. Noticing her fear, he radioed for assistance and closed the bathroom until further notice, shielding her from onlookers until Bazine, a fellow guard, had made her way over with the police and thankfully a change of clothes.

Due to the heightened security around her, Rey had decided on giving up on Jakku and going elsewhere to restart her life on a new beach. She didn’t even say goodbye for fear that someone would follow her.

Moving on was hard but the sponsors she represented understood she would be homeschooled on the road between trials and competitions. Mrs. Holdo, her manager, kept on her about her grades like a true mother would, even though she’s not Rey’s. That was part of Rey’s story that the media poured itself over. One tabloid had an article written about her upbringing in foster care like the had an idea of what it was like. Most of the reports on her personal life were false and always showed a stellar picture of her dropping in or giving a half smile looking out the corner of her eye, as if to tell that the underbelly of society could come out on top just like her. That was a fine image. She would hope that was just it and not based on magazine sales.

———  
Three Years Later  
———

Rey stayed out of the spotlight for during this time traveling to beaches just to find potential places she could settle down in, unless there was a competition. The press would go crazy for her each time she’d resurface. She’d do her best to smile and wave trying to think of her life back home, of the people she missed. Half way across the world, she’d been asked if she missed home which rattled her as if she was taped, or her mind was telepathically aiding a feed. She offers a simple “yes,” but it isn’t enough. They push for more. She knows her friends at home will be thrown into a world they won’t be able to handle, so she adds to their incessant badgering, “...and that’s why I can never return.” She knows it’ll be printed along with the sad eyes she bore into the reporter before excusing herself and keeping her head low returning to her heat slot ready to drop in again.

Sure enough the article was printed. Rey’s message would get out to Jakku Beach which wound up slowing them down to a normal crowd or fewer. Rose, who just started guarding that year, wept. She was inconsolable so much so that Mr. Skywalker had her take a few days off as if she had a death in the family.

Hux came across the article and realized she’d grown from the twig of a kid she was -oh he noticed... of course he did. He’d always loved being around Rey, but it shocked Ben the most. By all accounts he was too old for her then, he thought if they ever did meet again maybe they’d have something....but he’d be sure Hux wouldn’t be chasing her.

Hux just had the worst behavior when it came to women. Bazine found out during a date and slapped him into next week for advancing on her as he did. He was sure he’d never let that happen to Rey, and now it never would.

——  
Present Day  
Jakku Beach Guard Shack - 6:30 am  
——

Jakku Beach is starting it’s summer session, while its location has them open all year hosting vacationers from all over at resorts along the strip, it is still considered the third quarter- summer. Ocean Lifeguards work closely with the Coast Guard patrols all throughout the day and well into the evening as they always had, but summer was known to be much more intense.

“Every morning you’ll go out and survey the beach for ‘campers’. Make sure you call back if you need an escort for a drunk. Don’t be surprised at the sight of some of these people either. They seem to forget they’re on a public beach and have been known to leave anything and EVERYTHING...” says Jessika, a head guard. She’s been in charge for the last six years, however, she’s not the only one.

Matching her time were Ben and Armitage who rarely went by his first name. He despised every nickname he’d ever been given including “Red” calling the bearers of this name unoriginal wastes of intellects, usually accompanied with a snarl or glare. The only person that he’d allowed these foolish name mutations from was Rey-years ago. Rey could call him anything and he’d respond. She was a spunky little thing that made her claim to fame surfing at one of their annual contests he remembers daring her to do.

Rey used to sit about four feet away from the chair at the south side of the ten mile stretch, and had been known to follow the duo with Rose who is now on her third year guarding, was another beach rat, that came at the same time that Rey did. They would show up early, before sunrise, do some yoga, read, have their breakfast, talk-those girls could talk about everything...and surf. Surfing was an all day event. They only time they would stop was for food or to flirt with Solo. Hux wasn’t sure if what Rey was doing was flirting with him since he’d be disarmed with every last thing she would say to him. So he was truly envious of what she could say to Ben because it was noticeably flirting.

Ripped from his memories, Solo slaps his shoulder telling him they had roving duty this morning. This meant that they’d take the quads pulling a wide rake over the beach for the morning crowd, which also meant they had to deal with the schmucks who’d been out at night building bonfires or trying out the age old guilty pleasure of sex on the beach. Hux rolls his eyes and complains the whole way to the shed.

“Oh, shut up you big baby,” says Ben.

“Solo, I am not interested in your mockery. If I have to deal with another naked drunk, I’m switching to the afternoon shift permanently.”

“Hux. You sound ridiculous. You know that’s more work just to avoid bodies.”

“You do it then, Solo. I’ll handle the whole beach if it means I don’t have to speak to another human until we open.”

“Deal.”

——-  
Rey’s Morning  
Sea Falcon - Motel Room 540 - 6:30am  
——-

Rey’s traveled all night, getting only a few hours rest before popping up at 6:30am. She’s been out of the scene now for at least six months time which is enough for any surfer, even her, to be forgotten. Mrs. Holdo had a good run but family related matters became more dire and her return to a more structured life was of the most importance. Rey kicked out of her contracts within those last few months with plenty of open doors had she ever wanted to return if not as a surfer, certainly as a coach or spokesperson. Her lovely demeanor with everyone she met, her fans, and the general public, made them feel safe in investing in her...she really was a well rounded individual who sponsors would flock to. Rey had just turned twenty in May and was looking for down time -play time, not under the microscope or followed by cameras everywhere she went. This was a much needed change.

Today was going to be a fresh start in an old place-home. Six years was a long time. She had no concept of whether or not the crew she knew from her childhood were still around. Her mind drifts, tracing the pad of her thumb over her pictures, praying that she’d see them again.

It was time to get going if she was going to start up the way she always had. Rey packs breakfast, a strawberry yogurt, banana, and chocolate protein shake, a water bottle for later, then a change of clothes, extra bathing suit in case of a malfunction- she got to learn that one the hard way during a time trial. That was a nightmare, not one she had time to remember. The clock was ticking.

She grabs her brand bikini, made to look like a body wrapping she made from toilet paper all those years ago. A designer helped her finalize a brand for her - it fit snugly and almost felt like she was taped up from an injury which was welcome because of the hard crashes of the waves could easily dislodge many of the other suits she’d wear. They were all strapless, uniquely her. She had them in almost every color but loved her yellow one the best, a quick second was white, and some days she liked sporting the tankini type. The bottoms had a folded over design that mimicked the same thickness in the chest, that hung right at the hip, spreading for a full cheek covering which was necessary in this sport. One fall and a detachment later could destroy a career. Today she sported the yellow set. Over top of her baiting suit were white cotton shorts and pink oversized, thin tee shirt she knotted on the side, left to be exact.

She grabbed a towel, pocket of pictures, the romance novel she’d been reading as a distraction from her loneliness which she’d been actively arguing with over the characters feelings and plot of the story. It turned out to be that she’d done that her whole life, even with books like ‘Catcher In The Rye’ that book made her so angry. She’d drop cusses at Holden Caulfield like he’d been in the room with her. She legitimately felt the need to slap him a few times even though he was a fictional character. This particular book featured Jyn and Cassian who have been traveling all over the world looking for clues to find the ‘Sacred Temple of Kanata’ which had also been the title of the book and through their adventures there’s this pull to each other that she’s dying to read into. The only downside is she feels bad for Cassian, while being a total bad ass he’s not been given a fair deck of intellect when applied to Jyn. She could disarm him faster than she could blink her eyes, but man that didn’t count for anything if she couldn’t at least get to ‘first base’. She chided the literature in dismay.

Next she needed sunblock, Oakleys and the large brimmed sunhat. She figured that would help her sleep if she so choose or even better would shade her book so she didn’t burn her retinas. Finally... her Balsa wood short board and block of wax... “Ok! We’re - I’m ready to go,” remembering it’s really just her.

The motel is conveniently a block from Jakku Beach, but she has a bit to walk before she gets back to the south shore. She walks about a half mile before making it to the sand. It’s still choppy from the night before. Remembering they usually rake it in the morning has her a little self-conscious wondering who she may run into, if not anyone she remembers. Rey sets up shop four feet from the guard stand as she always did, sets her board down flat and drops her bag to the other side of her. She begins doing her morning work out, enjoying the peacefulness of dawn creep across the horizon. Watching vibrant color swirl around spent cumulonimbus clouds.

Yoga can be for anyone, that was what lured her in the first place. What she didn’t realize was, it would give her better core strength to take on those brutal currents after a storm or fix your aching back from driving eight hours in a Mini Cooper car rental. She makes a mental note never to do that again, rather go and lease a car she could actually use on the spot... like a Jeep or something SUV-ish she thinks to herself. Her poses become more and more advanced as she goes on in her routine, silkily moving between each pose when she here’s a motor soon past her, she’s not focusing on it though. Her eyes remain closed, focusing on her body, mind and movements pushing herself down into the wheel pose, heels high off of her board, her head dipped down past her shoulders, for a moment she paused and thinks she hears the motor silence. This doesn’t concern her she’s positive, pushing on into crow pose holding for moments before bringing herself into side crow, then the flying advanced one to follow, finally the headstand. This grouping of poses helps her stay focused even if there was some strange audience building somewhere behind her. Controlling her body back down to downward facing dog, walking it back to stand into tree pose before stopping.

Rey rolls her neck letting out a moan and dropping her shoulders rolling them getting ready for her first entry of the day. She could have sworn she’d heard someone but when she goes to look she’s disrupted by a red head booking it down the beach near the waters edge. Pulling off her teeshirt at the hem and pulling it over her head ready to fold it when she notices the man pass before her clearly starring. She pays no significant attention until she realizes that was a lifeguard. Her gaze follows him down the shoreline until another motor starts up from behind her and does the back of the beach. Whipping her gaze from the first to the second sound, realizing another man -guard with long dark hair, tall, muscular, finding herself wishing he’d stop and say ‘hello’ but he doesn’t. He doesn’t even look at her. Rey thumbs through her shorts pulling them off, stepping out of them and folding them up too. She pulls up her short board and heads down to the water.

——-  
North Jakku Beach - 6:50am  
——

“What were you doing, Solo.” Armitage tries to pry.

“Nothing.” Ben is unconvincing.

“Didn’t look like nothing.”

“The engine stalled.” He lied. His face turned scarlet remembering all of the woman’s positions and how stunned he was that anyone could move like her.

“Of course it did. Behind that brunette contorting her body at sunrise?” Hux snorts turning for the next pass down to south beach.

As they arrive Ben’s brow furrows wondering where she went. Her stuff was still there but not her. They make their rounds back and forth when Hux realizes she’s in the water. “She’s in at her own risk, we’re not in the chair for another hour and I’m not sitting until I have to.” Ben stops the quad and watches her paddle out past the cresting waves. He watches her sit sideways looking on as the waves come in, ready to break over the drop off just before the reef. She beams an immaculate grin when she’d picked one paddling to catch it, swiftly dropping in frontside and bobbing her rear towards them gaining control over this four foot crystal blue beauty. Possessing it, she drags her fingers through the barrel pulling the nose of her board back around through the froth, splattering bubbles all over her skin, before she turns to backside ride the rest of it out. She’s still smiling about it, pleased it with her run. She picks up her board and goes again unaware the guys had returned.

“Hm!” Hux makes a sound trying to wake up Ben from his daydream.

“Didnt you say you would do the entire beach if you didn’t have to worry about dealing with people?” He smirked, “I’m watching out for the people.” He says enjoying the view.

“Uh huh...” he started up the engine again riding back, realizing who it might be, smiling inwardly about it. Hux would get his chance. He was sure of it.

Rey had continued surfing for about an hour and a half which was too much time for Ben to watch her. For the time that he did get, he’d gotten off the quad and crossed his arms across his chest, watching from the guard stand she parked herself by. He stood on the other side, of course, in case she came out so that she wasn’t uncomfortable. Rey however stayed in enjoying the surf, sitting atop her board stretching, flexing her muscles before dropping in again. She’d try stunts made for longboard users on her short board, and even did a Kenobi favorite, stomping down on the nose to kick up the side and ride the edge of the board, on a high slant. His breathing became harder, when he realized who it might be, but tried dismissing it remembering the article and picture of her sadness in a quiet apology to them. Rey would go out one more time and just lay on the board back down, knees bent up towards the sky, arms up over her head, hair cascading from the board into the water. She’d listen to the waves lap and hear the seagulls caw around her until she heard the start up of another quad, turning and realizing her visitor was there again and leaving. Not sure of what else to do she acknowledged him with a wave, as he rode off to the guard shack no doubt.

Ben looked back just in time to see her raise her hand to wave it at him. There was no one else on the beach for miles. Ben decided to offer a hand, open, close to his chest as he rode away. His heart constricted as he wondered who this woman could be, and why she was waving at him. ‘Maybe that’s how she handles all of her stalkers?’ he scolds himself. ‘Maybe she figures by telling you she knows you’re here you’ll back off?’ the voice inside him continued, ‘You can wish all you want, a woman like that won’t speak to you-they never do.’ He’d berate himself about this all the way back wondering why he ever lifted his hand in the first place.

Rey would drop in one more time before getting out, striding back to her designated spot on the beach. Grabbing her towel and sun hat, she positioned her board to lay flat so she could sit on it, pulling her breakfast from her bag. By this time it was closer to 9:00am and people started staking their claims to beach positions. It was a lighter crowd but still building. Guards came setting up the stand next to her with two women she couldn’t recognize. Maybe the time really did set in. Maybe she really did lose them all.

Breakfast was strawberry yogurt in a wide mouth container with chunks at the bottom, and a banana. Usually she has the banana first but notices the spoon is missing from the package. “Bollocks.” She mutters... “Where’s the bloody spoon?” She sets them down on the board then grabs her bag, riffling through it, even shaking out clothes in hopes to find the tiny, blue piece of plastic. “There was one when I packed it this morning.” Giving up and becoming sour about having to stick her finger into it to mix the shallow container, she spouts, “of all the rotten luck, having to finger my breakfast like a savage...” she hears a snort above her, now realizing then guards had taken their stand and heard her. Inwardly she thanks her foresight in needing her brimmed hat today. Her smirk had beamed into a full watt smile, trying to keep herself from laughing and sounding crazier than she already did. “Spoon” she manages to say quieter this time. Setting down the yogurt, licking her finger clean, she opened her banana, and set it horizontally biting enough out of one section to be able to use it as a spoon. This is not her first time doing this. It’s the most provocative sight but she’s damned if she’s going to scoop her yogurt out of the cup with her finger, or try pouring it in her mouth like she did with applesauce containers.

Someone comes up beside her, a boy she can tell by his feet, ‘thank you brimmed hat’. “Excuse me, Miss?” He choked a grunt as she sucked the yogurt from her banana spoon, looking back up at him questioningly.

The light of the day has her squinting to try to look up at his face and it’s clear that this is difficult for her, so he asks to sit before continuing his agenda. Rey nods and he tries to collect himself before getting this honor of her presence. Once seated the first thing she notices is that he’s a guard. Sitting square next to her, puffing out his chest, his muscles glistening from obviously self applied sunscreen to his creamy white skin. It looked like he’d already gotten burned from the uneven application. His hair was pumpkin colored and a short length, long enough to spike if he wanted to, intense almond shaped green eyes that softened while looking upon her. His angled face and sculpted lips seemed so pronounced as if he was straining himself to be there. She frowned trying to take his presence in, trying to bridge the gap as to who it could possibly be.

He says he noticed her struggling with her food and wanted to offer his straw to have her yogurt. She blushes thanking him not minding the obvious chewing he’d been grinding down on the one side. Trying it while he sat with her. “Much easier than my banana spoon,” she laughed as his face contorted, “thank you?” Coaxing his name from him.

“Armitage.” He offers his name.

Her brow furrows and he’s just about ready to be teased by a ‘patron’ when Rey obviously looks him over, “Hugs?” She picked a nickname she’d heard Poe use from years ago. “Is it really you?” Her voice is hopeful.

“And you are?”

“Rey,” she offers carefully pulling her pointer finger to her lips, opening her eyes past her calm to her widened alarmed look.

“Rey Kenobi?...” he breathes, “I knew it.”

Flashing her shy smile, “How did you know? I’ve only been here for like four hours,” she shoved him playfully like she’d always done.

“How could I forget the best surfer here?” He asks kindly.

“It couldn’t have been that obvious.” She laughs.

“You’re doing everything you used to, except for moving every hour, so far it looks like you’ve settled in section nine chair six.” Rey lifts an eyebrow to his assessment. “Head Guard” He pats his chest.

“Well congratulations” she nods, “does the head guard ever get to go in?” Nodding at the ocean, and slurping her yogurt.

He stairs at her as her soft pink lips wrap around the bite marks in his straw, pinched softly between her thumb and index finger. She gazes up at him with innocent hazel eyes waiting for his answer. He nods. “When do you get off?” Theres no answers. “Hugs?”

Armitage clears his throat, but doesn’t make much of a sound in his answer. “I’ll be down in an hour.”

“Perfect. I’ll finish eating, and then you can come join me when you’re down.” She pulls out her dirty novel.

“Ok.” He can barely release from his lips. He looks down at her book, “is that any good?” Looking for anything else to change the subject from his nervousness around her calm.

Rey lifts her eyebrow to it. “Yeah it’s alright, if adventure and racy sex scenes are your thing.” She smiles at his reaction. He coughs a couple times and doesn’t expect her to continue but really should because she used to be a relentless tease back then too. “Cassian needs to stop being such a wanker and Jyn needs to get fucked, honestly, I think it’ll calm things down between the two of them.” She bubbles in laughter pushing at him again. “Oh that reminds me...”

‘What could any of that remind her of between the two of them?’ He thought.

“You’ve streaked your sunblock. If you don’t fix it your burns will look like someone has clawed your back to bits. Don’t you have someone to help you with that?

“Um.” Pausing starting to piece together what she just implied, “No, Bazine used to do it but she got a job. She’s a cop now.”

“Bazine...oh...” she remembers back to that day. She was so nice and comforting. “When did she stop?”

“A couple years after your incident.”

“By chance do you have her number? I’d like to thank her. I never really got to.”

“Yeah, my phone is in the shack. Maybe later we can take a walk or something?”

“Ok. Tell me everything that’s changed?”

He nods, “I better go. I should be roving. See you in an hour.”

Rey nods, bites into her banana and resumes reading her book. A few position changes later and she’s found the right spot laying on her stomach, legs crossed behind her, on her towel. In the heat of the morning she’s unhooked the back of her top exposing her bare back to even her lines while she waited to go back in with ‘Hugs.’ Rey gets engrossed in her book finding Jyn and Cassian arguing, yet again, over losing their passports this time. Of course she dropped them in the airport but it’s definitely his fault for being so distractingly forward. “Oh! You! Twat tease-I swear to God, if Jyn kills you, I completely agree with her motives.”

Rey hears giggling above her from guys? The brim of her hat is just long enough to be peered under and she notices that Guard from earlier that she happened to wave at biting his finger, trying to control himself no doubt hearing what she’d said. Rey finds herself biting her lip, almost studying the side of him when she catches him looking her over. ‘Maybe it’s the book talking, but did it just get hotter? Bloody hell. That man is gorgeous...’

Just as she’s enjoying locking eyes with this man, she notices ‘Hugs’ feet stride back into her view. “H—“ he chokes on his breath seeing her bare back. Clearing his throat a few times, he almost says her name before she throws her book at him.

“I don’t need the whole beach knowing I’m here.” She hisses, “if you screw this up for me, I’ll have to leave again...”

“You’re not the only one with that name,” he stops when he realizes she’s reattaching her top. He looks up at Ben who has the best view, “a bunch of kids were born with it over the years.”

This was something she wasn’t aware of. “Hang on, so there are six year olds that have visited, named after me?” She clasps the back finally.

“There are at least three in the lagoon.”

“Really?” She says skeptically.

Hux nods. “What would I be gaining if I lied?” That seems to settle her.

“Ok, ok...Where’s your board?” She eyes him.

“Share?” He tries knowing that has always been a no.

“Nope! Go get your board, I’ll be out there.” Rey picks up her board and runs to the water, diving with the board she made herself through rolling waves.

Hux watches on, still standing where she left him. “So ‘Hugs’” Ben uses Because he’s let this girl call him this while he’s been in the rotation. “When are you going to tell her you don’t know how to surf?”

Armitage laughs in a slow subtle way as if as a warning.

“You don’t have a chance, Hux.” He watches as she tears through wall turning up a barrel. She goes low speeding through it and turning up casually as if she’d been sleeping through it. God that made him sit forward trying to control the interest in his pants.

“Says the man she hasn’t said a word to. She doesn’t even know you exist, Solo. All she knows is me, and that Bazine left.” It takes a second for him to process. It didn’t take long for him to let the cat out of the bag. Immediately he feels like he’s lost his chances even though he wasn’t sure he even had one. ‘Shit.’

Ben blows his whistle, motioning his hand at a swimmer venturing towards the fishing grounds. He doesn’t respond to Hux though. Instead he remembers how intent she’d been staring him down and chewing her lip, and even back to this morning, now she’s out there surfing, clearly enjoying herself, “Hux. What are you going to do when she finds out Rose and her friends are still her?”

‘Crap he did hear me.’

——  
Jakku Beach Guard Shack / First Aid Center  
10:30am  
——

“What are you thinking about for lunch?” Rose asks Poe before grabbing supplies to restock their first aid kits for the afternoon rotation.

“I don’t know, you want to order in again?” Poe asks, completely distracted with his phone.

“Nah, they never come in less than an hour and I don’t need a cramp running from chair to chair because I stuffed my face fifteen seconds before going up.”

“That’s ...” pitting one finger up, “right. Where do you want to go then?”

“How about that wings place right out back?”

“No. Last time I got to waste $10 on six wings and a flat soda. What about sushi from Sindula’s on 43rd and Main?” He looks up at Rose.

“Is that the place with the sweet and spicy breaded kimchi?”

“It’s the only place I know of that is regulated sushi... so probably. If you remember eating it with me, that’s a solid probably.”

Rose snorts. “Ben do you want anything?”

“Nah- Sushi isn’t my thing.” He sounds distracted.

“Alright let’s go then. You’re driving Poe.”

“Why? Oh your scooter. I’m not riding on that. Yeah. Come on let’s go.” Poe waves Rose on out the door. “Connix is coming too, she said she’d be five minutes.”

——

Rey had been surfing the south side for long enough to know what time it is was with the change of the sun‘s position even after six years away from home. After Hux basically stood her up not following her in, she decided it was time to see if anyone had heard from Rose, Connix, Poe or Ben. She holds her breath on the later... he was older than her and always saying ‘when he’d get a real job that he’d be out of there so fast...’ it didn’t keep her from hoping though. The only person she felt could help her with this was to see if Mr. Skywalker was still there. He had been given so many opportunities to retire since she had last seen him that she would be surprised if he was there too. Ripping her last wave, coasting to the shallows, she scans the shore looking for any familiar faces. There aren’t any. Trying to keep her head high on her shoulders, she repeated to herself that she wasn’t alone, that someone might still be out here for her.

Rey came to the conclusion that Hux would hide this from her, since he didn’t even have the gall to get in. She knew he was a goofy rider and completely uncomfortable about it, but that didn’t mean to “Yes” her and then back out. She shakes her head, some things never change.

Pulling up her board under her arm and picking up camp, she was ready to walk the two miles up to the shack. Two miles with her load wasn’t anything new to her. She used to do this all the time. With the shack in sight she strode right up to it, wedging her board into the sand right at the bottom of the stairs. The shack was the pearl of Jakku Beach’s center. Built up on stilts with stairs on both sides and a wonky looking ramp out front that went to the underbelly to a lift, hindsight it made sense but the design was not quite as straight forward as it should have been. The building itself was a sizable room with enough space for a couple of offices to the back and right wall by the door. It’s very similar to what she remembers, painted a soft blue inside, tide schedules, maps and important phone numbers were plastered to one wall, and then low filing cabinet jutting through the room separating Mr. Skywalker’s desk from someone else’s. He always liked his designated space so it didn’t look strange to her where it might to someone else. A sitting area for the guards that were off duty to the left fitted with couches and seating around a plastic table. Playing cards and magazines littered the on it. A flat screen tv was mounted on the wall. There are lockers down the left wall in the form of cubbies, and the board where she plucked Ben’s pictures off of. Especially ones taken of the both of them. She remembered years ago there were fluorescent lights like they had in school, now she wasn’t sure if it was the same or updated as the reflection on the glass shielded her vision. The wall she’d been on provided a set of heavy of double doors with two large window openings with a ledge many liked to lean on, Rey included, on either side in the event that patrons had to come up to request help or information. This seldom happened anymore since most everyone had cellphones and could find all of the information comfortably from their space on the beach.

Rey stood at the top of the stairs, knocking gently at the half opened sliding window. It was dark in there but the lights were seldom on, she tries to remember a time they’d been on even thought it wasn’t the evening. Shaking herself back to the present trying to focus on what she needs. She needs to know if she was too late. Rapping on the window again, and noticing movement, she has the gall to speak up, “Excuse me? Please? I need your help.” The person shifts, she can tell he’s a guard and that he’s huge sprawled over the couch. His arm falls from covering his face to his chest in response to her sounds. She’s sure he can’t hear her when she realizes he’s the same guy who had been on the stand, she’d locked eyes with. She spit a few curses and dropped an antagonizing line admonishing herself her attraction to his sex appeal and she’d said far too loud. “Get a grip, Rey.” She blames her need to be heard, but that should never of poured out of her. ‘Right, I’ll just go in and use the phone myself. He’s sleeping, and it’s just a phone call.’ She reaches the door handle, rotating the handle and pulling it open slowly, going into the lions den with that delicious beast. She bubbles at the description she’s plastered to him purring it out loud since he’s most clearly asleep.

Not really, Ben’s heard every word Rey had said. He’s not sure he’s ready to confront her. This attractive woman he’d known all those years ago infiltrating his brain with what memories or new interests? The ‘what if’s’ began to plague his brain into flat out ignoring her. Alarm went off in his mind now because now she was in his space.

She strides in to a desk to call Rose, hoping her number is the same after all of this time, lifting the receiver and pressing her number into it she’s lucky to hear it ring. “Pick up. Pick up. Pick up. Pick up.” She muttered softly. Rey is alerted to ringing coming from a locker. She slams the phone down, picking it up to redial, the same happens. Out of disbelief she does it two more times. Then she tries Ben. The same happens and she breaks down covering her hand to her face, letting out a sob, “they’re still here,” she breathes through a pitiful whimper.

Ben watches her emotional moment, unsure if he should ‘wake up’ or watch this through. He chooses not to thinking that this is a personal moment, instead of one that should be reassured about? About what? The fact that they’ve been left in this life, thinking she’d never return? Why wouldn’t she call? If she missed them, us, me like she appeared to, why couldn’t she contact them? His mind keeps filling last what he’s seeing, clouding his judgment on the gift that she fought for, her return home.

Rey bends down to pull her pictures she stole, finding the board and trying to match them to who they were then to who they maybe now. He watches her stroke a picture being frustrated that she couldn’t figure out who... ‘oh no’ Rey puts her fingers over a picture of him covering his hair, studying his face. She’s figured it out. With age he filled out from the tall, lanky young man he was. Though Rey never saw him that way, she would see his size as a comfort she would never own. His features as the younger man were in her own words ‘heartbreaking’. He could look at her sincerely and his big brown eyes could bake her in place, as the well done goose she claimed to be. Which stemmed of course from Mr. Skywalker’s constant reference of being caught troublemaking under his nose as, “your goose is cooked.” For a time she wondered if he ever did have goose before she realized it was a ‘saying’. Ben had this sweet little pout in pictures he didn’t smile for that she would find on the older version of him, removed from his baby face she never realized he had until realizing his change.

As she pieces her findings together, Ben’s heart stops beating when he sees her swivel her head back to him while he’s peaking through his lashes. ‘No, no, no, no, mayday, MAYDAY...’ sirens blare in his head.

She softly pads over to him, trying his name, “Ben?” She kneels over the couch at the floor next to him. Her heart beating faster and faster, running her fingers through his hair to the side of his face, pushing it back behind his ear, “when you wake,” she tries softly, “Please... please surf with me. I miss you.” His breathing shallows immensely, some how maintaining a usually calm rhythm, even though he wants to explode at her closeness, then completely stops when she plants a kiss on his cheek. Her lips soft like pillows and a tiny squeak from them from the pressure she had extended to him. He could feel sweat beading over his cool skin thankfully prickling under the canopy of his thick obsidian locks.

Rey looks over him, obviously struck as to how handsome he was before returning to her feet. She notices the white board and the marker hanging off of the ledge. She pulls the cap signing the board, right next to their rotation, with “I’m home within the waves of Jakku Beach. Love you all, Rey Kenobi!” She was sure every guard that came through would find her now, even Rose.

Their moment was just that, he’d watched her gather her things and go, stifling a sniffle. ‘Rey...’

——

Rey pads down the stairs quietly. Pulling her board from the setting in the sand, she strides down to the ‘Mile 5’ stretch right in front of the shack. ‘Low tide goes out in two hours,’ she remembers from the pamphlet on her night stand this morning. Carving out a space nice and close to the guard stand, closer than usual because of someone else’s claim. Guards in the stand, ogle her as she sets up. This isn’t new to her, she’d received this reaction her whole life, being older was the difference now. Ben wasn’t in the chair, she just left him in the shack- ‘have at your fantasies boys,’ Rey disrobes, collects her board, and heads out paddling through the calm of the lagoon, all the way out past the reef. This is a solid mile swim. If she had trouble it would be the Coast Guard that would have to be involved. She knew that, but a colossal wave was what she wanted after that episode. Rey dreamt about planting one on Ben for years- just never thought it would ever happen, or that she’d be bold enough for it. “Please you minx... your dropping in on eight foot swells, or larger... remembering that one time she really should have just listened about.... kissing a boy should not be as terrifying.” The voice in her head corrects her, ‘that’s no boy...’ greedily remembering him. ‘Mmhmmm’....

Guards on the stand let the Coast Guard know they have a ‘bogey’ coming at them. “Another surfer coming out to ‘Mile 5’, over,” their line to the Coast Guard rings through to all of the other chairs starting a buzz among the them. Usually when a surfer tries it they’re towed in immediately, not being strong enough either to paddle out or being destroyed by diving through the walls. Not Rey. Guards start radioing each other wanting the updates down the stretch. All six chairs panned out on ‘Mile 5’ have binoculars up looking out for a chance to see.

Ben sits up, from the couch with his head in his hands, softly touching that spot on his cheek, so close to his lips, not sure if he can jumpstart his mind back from this abyss she’d cracked open when she left. He’s pulled from his thoughts when Poe, Rose and Connix walk through with their lunch.

“Hey man...you ok Solo?” Asks Poe noticing his buddy seems to be paler than he was despite his already light complexion.

Rose and Connix go to bring their food to the table, casually dropping it. Rose realizes she doesn’t have her phone and goes to her locker. “Four missed calls? From...Ben if you wanted food you could have called Poe.”

“It wasn’t me.” Still touching his cheek.

“Really? Then....” her eyes are directed to the white board, “who...?” Reading the message has her swelling with tears. She drops her phone, and then over the radio tuned into only hear the Coast Guard, “We have visual. Surfer in bound, ‘Mile 5’. She’s waving. Dropping in. All yours, Over.”

Rey.

Dropping in riding hard and fast down to the middle of the wave, her steadiest place to start her showy runs. When she’s happiest she gives a little hip shake as if she’s dancing, pulling her arms from balancing her over her head, outstretching at least one hand to feel the overhead, another signature move, ‘seduction’ she thought, though the sponsors would never let her call it that so she renamed it her guilty pleasure, ‘Reylo’, as one of her tricks. The boys would tell her she was new schooling it trying to get the edge on her but she’d never budge. Usually her tricks were spur of the moment and glorified because of it. No one really knew what to do with her. Coming out of the barrel she cut left hard to pull through the soup before slowing enough to turn and paddle back.

Out on the water it was just her and the ocean. The salt singing through her veins, the roar of each wave cresting and rolling towards her would awaken something entirely primal within her. As if she was fully connected to it, Jakku was calling to her, telling her she was finally home.

Tears fall from Roses face as she runs past Poe shoving him into the wall trying to get down to the beach. Ben, Poe, and Kaydel stand making their way down the stairs after her. Rose grabs the rescue board, not having her own until Ben calls to her not to. “It’ll look like an emergency.” Rose shoves on paddling out to her friend. It takes Rose a solid ten minutes but she gets there, sitting in the soup from the wave that crashed when she realizes that Rey dove through resurfacing ready to take the next one.

Rey returns three more times enjoying each in her own special way completely unaware of the crowd building and the other surfers paddling out to enjoy a closer view of this ‘bitchin’ rider’.

The radios were pinging between the beach and the Coast Guard, now getting to be a bit of a sport of chatter between them. “‘Coast Guard Captain Bridger to ‘Mile 5’? So you know, we’re sending out a boat to her to see if she needs anything, figuring the runs were exhausting. Over.”

Pulling the radio in Ben responds, “Coast Guard this is ‘Mile 5’ Head Guard Solo. Is she ok?” He sounds worried and it pings all over the strip to every chair, “Over.”

“Just fine Solo. Requested music, Rose Tico, and dinner with you later.” Captain Bridger laughs, “Surfer moving back inbound. Over.”

Rey beams as she waves to Captain Bridger, before paddling to catch her last ride before paddling back to shore. This one, right before low tide, is spectacular. She drops fast and hard down the gigantic swell before cutting in, marking the wave as hers with her move from this morning, pulling the rail high, the roar of the wave surging into a barrel pushes her lower and lower towards the board before being spat out at such a force she’s shucked from the shoulder, gaining air before coming down hard through the remaining barrel. Not the prettiest run but she’s learned the uglier the better. More fun that way. Rey pops up after her wipe out laughing, climbing back on the board stretching that one out and paddling back leisurely to the shore unaware Rose had been out there. She offers a Shaka to everyone who whistles at her on her return.

“‘Mile 5’; Head Guard Solo to Captain Bridger. Surfer is coming ashore. Over.”

“Roger that, Solo. Over.”

Rey winds up a little further down from from her starting point upon exiting the lagoon. She walks back on slightly galantines legs as she sees a shorter woman pulling a long board marked ‘Jakku Beach Ocean Guard’ on it out of the water ahead of her. Rey remembers her pictures in the shack, gasping, dropping her board and running a solid 200 meter sprint before crashing into Rose who had noticed Rey sprinting. “ROSE!!!” Rey cried. Sobbing before slumping with her to their knees. “I missed you so much!!”

It was a solid ten minute hug filled with sobs and explanations, “why did you just leave?” Rose whined.

“I couldn’t stay after that. This is my home and they violated it. Violated me...I didn’t need people I loved being harassed... it’s why I didn’t call. I asked Holdo to run over my phone when I figured the bloody thing had to be bugged...” Rey choked on her own hair being blown back into her face with the breeze.

Rose pulled back from her friend assessing the true pain in her falling tears. “But the last article they printed of you...how are you here?” This was something everyone wanted the answer to, even Ben who stretched his hearing, past caring about anything else on the beach, even the fact that he was twenty minutes late to relieve Hux. He didn’t care, Rey was more important.

Rey sniffled, “if I didn’t, they would still be stalking me, you, all of you...” she said quietly, “it was the only way I could come back.” Rey’s exhaustion kicks in and shudders a yawn.

“How long have you been here?” Rose asks.

“I got here late last night, in a bloody sardine can,” referring to the rental.

“And on the beach?”

“Started south side at 7:00am.” Rey watches her eyebrow lift. “I’m staying at the Sea Falcon until I can get a place out here. I pretty much have my clothes, food and board.. all the necessary equipment.” She laughs through a sniff.

“Well it’s good to have you back....” she can’t help her voice pitch dreamily. “Have you eaten?”

“Breakfast.”

“It’s after 1pm.” Rose informs her... “you need to eat. We’re late for...” she looks up at the afternoon crew that had taken over, “I guess were fine? Not fine...” realizing Hux flying in with Jessika on the quads, staring them down.

“Are you going to get in trouble?” Rey asks Rose.

“With Hux? Yeah has going to be a shit stain for leaving him in the chair.”

“Sorry.” Rey looks sheepishly at Rose.

“It’s fine, it’s just ‘Hugs.’ They both giggle.

Of course Hux threw a tantrum, hollering at every guard within earshot, not noticing that Rey had gotten up from the ground where she had collapsed crying with Rose. Rey walked off in Hux’s direction.

She eyes him, aside Ben, “Excuse me...’Hugs’...you’re on my towel...” she tries to say sweetly.

Hux stutters, “oh, uh, oh... so I am,” he shuffles off, shaking off the sand.

Rey asks him what happened before, “why’d you stand me up?” Taking full advantage of disarming him. “I know you don’t surf, rather better at dick ragging, but the point was to enjoy pumping,” she says straight faced as ever. Not so for Poe and Ben especially sporting a bright red color blush under their bulged eyes and widening grins. Hux looked at her curiously, knowing she’d huff a good swear or spout something completely inappropriate, but the way she said it made him believe it meant something completely unrelated. “Get the imaginary fucking out of your head,” she waves him from view, remembering her board and walking off.

Jessika walks up to her, welcoming Rey home. “It’s been a long time. What brought you back?”

“This is home.” It’s all she had to say. “How’ve you been?”

They enjoy small talk on the way back to the chair. Ben’s still there leaning at the side of the chair talking to a new face to her. Ben knew what she was doing, speaking to Hux like that. They locked eyes before she and Jessika passed him to the other side by her towel. “Just let me know if you need anything, ok?”

Rey giggles, “thanks, I may need a job soon.”

“Interest in guarding?”

“I’m not sure. I’ve never done anything like this.” She gestures at watching over the shoreline. “I’ve always been in it.”

She nods, quirking a brow. “That is not the hardest part of the job, but you may be the strongest swimmer here, and we can always use that.” She winks.

“I’ll think about it. Thanks Jess.” Nodding towards her towel and setting down her board.

“Sure. How long are you here today?”

“I’ll be here till you close or Solo asks me out,” Rey smirks, “whichever comes first,” pulling her dirty book out and getting ready for a bit of unhooked time relaxing.

Rose sits next to Rey, “I have to go up in twenty, Mile 3, if you...”

Rey startled her getting up immediately. “Of course I do. I came back for you, Rose. I might want Solo, good Lord, I know I’m not going to out grow that, but you’re my best friend. You come first.” Shaking out her towel and gathering her bag. “Lead on,” ready to walk out another mile to get there. She watches Rose light up like fireworks across the sky. “How are the waves at ‘Mile 3’?

Ben looks on.

Rose laughs, “Never enough?”

“Nope!”

——

Rey moves with Rose from chair to chair. She spends her time happy to talk about anything with her. Rose catches her up to speed on new people, the mingling going on, who left, who joined the Coast Guard. “Connix didn’t wind up going pro like she hoped. She had a bad injury to her knee after dropping in the shallows. It was a freak accident but she also tried surfing too close to low tide.”

“Bollocks...That’s awful. What happened? Like? She’ll never ride again? Or needs some kind of surgery?”

“She tore her ACL and Patellar ligaments. She had surgery but it didn’t take. Connix was told that if her body couldn’t accept it, it would turn into a chronic pain coming and going as it pleases. She has to wear a brace all the time and I just feel bad, ya’ know?”

Rey’s mind starts racing watching the waves in front of her. Kaydel Ko Connix was the first female surfer she’d ever seen take the ‘Mile 5’ breakers. Rey felt like she indirectly owed it to Connix for her own successes. “What does she do now?”

“She works with Mr. Skywalker in the shack event planning with the resorts.”

“Lucky her! That sounds fun. What will be going on this summer?” She asks trying to deter her friend from the inner workings in her mind, processing what could be done within their limits. Usual events could take up to fifteen months to rig up. Two months would be pushing it, but she had the connections, just needed space within the resorts in the area to host an influx of her surf-mates, their teams and sponsors if they so chose to become involved. A lot had to be provided for, especially if they could push it out to all of the rookies to legends. She knew Holdo could help her but it was going to take something more to plan such an event.

“Well the usual. Lots of concerts, firework displays, fun runs, surfing events” she lifts an eyebrow to Rey. “You should get involved with that, the ‘Mile 5’ would be right up your alley.”

“That? They let people do that?” Rey is incredibly surprised by this. Then remembers she was just a kid when she did but she felt she was different.

“It’s usually sparse but I’m sure it could become something outstanding if...” she trails knowing that was a life she walked away from.

“We’ll have to see on that one. When is that usually?”

“End of August during the Rise of the Golden Moon Festival.” Rey remembers this. It had been Jakku’s crowning achievement, bigger and better every year. Her last year experiencing it was awesome. They had so much music, speakers up and blasting during the day. Different hours meant different music that touched on every genre except for hardcore metal and explicit artists reminding the patrons that they were staying respectful for families that may not have come for the events. Live concerts at night, bonfires, food....so much food, catered from every shop in town. Local businesses had event booths, and all types of other beach sports like volleyball and frisbee tournaments- oh that festival was ‘the shit’. If you did nothing all summer you had to be there for that festival in particular.

Rey starts smiling at the thought. She could make this work. “When are you done tonight?”

“Five.”

“Perfect. I need to buy a phone.”

“What happened to your—oh yeah. I was just quizzing you.

Ben comes up to her side just out of view overhearing the talk about her racy book after Rose nod at it. Of course Rey answers vulgarly, “...who needs a vibrator when literature can get you off?” She snorts at Rose’s unbearable laughter, “bloody hell, don’t tell me,” her face blushed hotter than the sunburn on her back, “Hi Ben,” she tried really hard not to laugh at what he just heard. “Are you off soon too?”

Ben can’t seem to ever know what to say to Rey. Lots of times she’s just come on too strong, but almost completely loosing her, and then the swell of his heart when he’d heard her midday... and kissed him... he felt ready to try. “Yeah,” he manages, “What are you doing now?”

‘Besides wanting to follow you home?’ She rolls her eyes at herself, “walking back to my motel room for starts. It’ll be a migration since I’m closer to south beach,” She giggles. “Aside from that, shower, change, get a phone... and eat something. Pretty simple night I think.” She smiles watching him intently, “What are you up to?”

“Walking back? You know that’s at least three miles? Right?”

“Well, Yeah,” she answered, trying not to be weird about it. “Would you like to walk with me?”

‘Honestly, no. A three mile walk does not sound ok right after work.’ “Um, how about a ride instead? We all usually get our stuff from the shack before we go,” he offered, nodding at Rose as she came down the chair. “Tico, you want a ride too? I figured you guys would be going out tonight being your first night back.”

“I live right there,” she points behind the guard shack, “just like the rest of the guards. I don’t think I need a ride.” She laughs. “I’ll see you tomorrow Rey,” she brings Rey in for a squeeze. “Have fun.” Knowing Rey’s been dying for him since high school.

——-  
Jakku Beach Guard Shack  
End of Morning Shift -5:00pm  
——

The three walk back to the shack and Rey stopped at the bottom, figuring she’d wait for them there.

“What’re’ya doing?” Asks Ben as he realizes she’s opting out of going up.

“I don’t work here,” nodding at the building.

Before he could stop himself, “‘Didn’t stop you before,” he almost chokes on all of those words realizing he was admitting to knowing she was there. His body tenses and stings with goosebumps knowing she’d never ignore any word he would expel from his lips. He was caught. His face and body noticeably flush as he tries to offer his big right paw as a plea not to bring it up or make a scene, even though he sort of knows that’s not her ‘thing’.

Rey’s breath hitches and as she exhales she doesn’t realize she was holding it to begin with. Taking her hand he guides her up the stairs in front of him. He’s still holding hers as they make it through the double doors, briefly releasing her as he makes his way around her and the guards off of morning shift, to his locker. He notices her whimper when he pulls just out of reach, which floods another warmth over his skin.

Rey’s given the opportunity to catch up with Poe and Connix, the more they talk the more she wants to help Kaydel. Just about every guard coming off their shift asks if she’ll be back tomorrow and she reassured them that she’s home now and will be back to her usual antics, “Yoga’s at 7am -south beach,” she laughs not realizing this was an invitation.

There’s more chatter around them when Ben makes it back by her, his hand now low at the base of her back, “Are you ready?” His voice is low, filled with anticipation of being with her now. All day she’s ravaged his mind and now this small, simple gesture she hasn’t coiled away from, rather leaned into, has his heart in his throat. Rey nods into him, welcoming him to her, hand in hand as they walk out to his car.


	2. You Will Always Be Heard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben reconnect. 
> 
> Mr. Skywalker gives a rookie guard a history on Rey.
> 
> Ezra shares what was really said beyond the waves. 
> 
> Rey has more to admit to Ben.

Ben drives a black Dodge Durango with a red leather interior. It has obvious ware from the scalding sun, salt and sand that no vehicle can really withstand here in Jakku. The design, well, red leather she’s certain she’s never ever seen before. ‘No kidding.’ Rey never really thought of what she was driving, rather that it could get her from one place to another without breaking down or blowing up. Looking over at him after stuffing her bag and hat in the passenger’s side, she realizes he used his surf roof rack to mount her board, which gets her excited, “You still surf?” sounding so hopeful she could explode.

The last time they surfed together was the day of the ‘Mile 5’ contest. Ben who had been old enough to trial for it had already paddled out with the other numbered adults that afternoon. His flashback slows his response. He bobs his head, then runs his fingers through his hair like a goddamned underwear model, she was sure he could sell anything just at the bat of an eye.

‘When the fuck did he turn into this Goliath of a being?’ Rey hung in the silence of his inward thoughts, while they felt like forever, it’s only been a few moments.

He breaks a huge grin remembering her request from this afternoon. “Yep.”

“Maybe tomorrow then?”

Ben nods. He won’t make her draw this out, “Tomorrow morning ok? I’m on afternoon shift.”

“It’ll be a long day for you,” she looks over at him across the the roof, trying desperately not to feel deflated if he backs out, she’s helping by handing over the straps while standing in the passenger’s side seat.

High tide is in the morning all week. He wouldn’t deny her of this time with him either. Cementing him into a date with her for tomorrow even though they were spending time together now, “I wouldn’t miss it.” He watches on as her lips part, cursing the space between them. Rey pushes up and over it with her strong arms as if she’d just pushed up to stand on her board even though she’s sure the roof is burning her fingerprints well off. Rey lunges greedily across the roof, planting her lips swiftly onto his. Surprised but welcomed, he braces his hand alongside her face, deepening her kiss, being just as starved for her as she was for him. He slows her pace to a pause with a groan, before releasing her, he’s muttering a subtle command laced with need for her to get in. He didn’t want to share her. She was his. Only his. 

Smiling. Pleased with herself. Enjoying his lasting desire tingling throughout her, she nodded once, slinking off the roof, and was met with the roar of the engine, AC blasting and Ben already reaching for her. Obviously, she’s died, right? Stuck in a welcomed limbo, ready to live out all of her glutinous fantasies she’d ever concocted for the rest of eternity. 

Rey was sure it wasn’t some rush because he was older, or a disillusioned infatuation that built over time. Rey loved him because of him, because of who he was. The years between them while she ran had her hoping to God he hadn’t moved on. Though it wouldn’t be fair she prayed for the chance at him even though she’d left. He deserved a better life. He deserved someone that would be as good to him as she could have ever wished to be. 

It felt only right, now, to delve into the ever-burning fire she knew she had for him. Rey needed him to know her feelings for him were as real and as sure as the tide. Definite. It’s not like she didn’t drop hints like bricks in puddles. Rey wanted to be sure he knew...She could feel his ache in his kiss, as if it was a long time coming. As if he’d believed she’d be snatched up from him again, hanging on, just as desperately as she was.

Having been pretty even minded all of those years back then, knowing her age put her in a place that had to be controlled by conscience, that very place was was surely out the window now. Their difference didn’t stop from caring about her the way he did. He’d been teased sticking up for her, keeping an eye out, being protective. In return Rey would complement him, be truly happy to be around him, something he wouldn’t be sure he deserved. His family life was decaying for all to watch, but she had less and was always supportive. They had each other until she left, destroying his world. He tried, he really tried to help her feel safe after the incident and blamed himself for failing her. “I missed you so much, Rey” he strains to release.

“You won’t have to anymore-“ she smiled into him cheekily. Looking at her sweetly, as he did when he was younger, his hair now sweeping over his eyes as he moved. Rey swallows, bracing herself, “I have something for you. I’ve been working on them since....since I left...” Rey freezes as the words slip from her breath.

Silence stretches over them when he finally asks, “What is it?” Finding he’s now incredibly curious. What could she possibly have brought with her on the road?

“Notes.” She blushes, “well really books of notes, letters I suppose. I...” She blinks out a few hard tears, “I didn’t -couldn’t let you go, even though I couldn’t stay.” Her voice now much lower, becoming hoarse, “so I’d write about anything that reminded me of you, or things that would cross my mind, that I’d loved to have asked, like why you like provolone on anything,” giving the simplest of examples as her journals were anything but, and starts to giggle about it. “I’d talk or write to you like you were in the room with me, or “get your thoughts” on anything.... everything...” the silence is now deafening straining her voice past recognition “I sound absolutely mad, don’t I?” Ben doesn’t respond. “The thing was, you were the most solid person I had besides Rose-she’s got a collection too-“ she wipes her eyes, “Running was terrifying. If I at least had that, I still had you.” 

The air conditioner sounded like it was blowing cool air out of its vents as if it was heaving bags of sand. Just above the noise, was her ragged voice choking down more emotion than she’d ever allowed. It moved him to know she’d done these things in his memory. Oddly gave him a shiver through his body at the thought of answers? ‘Would she of told him about it if-‘

“I tried calling. Every new location -every time. I just figured, random numbers popping up on your phone would be an instant voicemail opportunity but I couldn’t give you those numbers solidly. I was taking a chance at your expense, every time, until I figured out the places I’d stay at were bugging the line.” She looks down from him playing with her cuticle, “It turns out that the media can pay a ‘special fee’ to take anything they want.” Rey rubs an itch off of her nose. “I couldn’t let it happen. As much as it hurt. And as much as I’m sure I hurt you. I-“

Ben reaches out for her, pulling her awkwardly in over the center console, he hugs her sincerely. “I don’t think you’re ‘mad’,” using her term instead of ‘crazy’, because she wasn’t crazy for trying to stay stable, “if it worked for you, that’s all I care about-“ briefly stopping, “no actually, I want to know what you wrote- provolone is delicious. What other questions were there?”

Bubbling at his inquisitive look, “Plenty. You have a small library.” Blushing about the admission of it. “Rose was a close second, but writing to her was like we used to, things I really couldn’t tell you.” He raises his eyebrow, “woman things- I strongly doubt you’d like the details of my,” she shook her head, “fishing are we?”

“Caught.” His heart is swelling with the acceptance of all of this. Taking the steering wheel with one hand and keeping her close to him with the other. “Well, thank you. When you -your..,” he pauses pulling in reverse, thinking about how he would shift into drive, when he sees her pop it in casually, to cruise back down to the motel. “When I saw you that day. It destroyed me.” His voice drops, “I couldn’t accept what happened to you. I couldn’t handle seeing you like that. You’d been through— and you still were going to leave the bathroom in practically scraps of nothing. Locking you in the there was the only thing I could think to do.” Another pause pressing his breath out heavily, “Your face told it all but it was real when Bazine came with the cops. That’s when I knew I failed you.” Ben vividly remembered the ordeal down to the overcast light that seemed to cloud his vision. 

They stop at a red light just a block from the Sea Falcon Motel. “You didn’t fail me, Ben. The bathroom wasn’t your responsibility. You weren’t my bodyguard. You were a lifeguard....that I couldn’t help but practically stalk with my best friend.” She chokes a whisper of a laugh. “It’s fine. You’re here now, and it can’t happen again...I’m much stronger—an adult now, and I have you.” She nuzzles into him under his chin.

‘I have you...’ he thinks.

Releasing a breath firmly from his nose, and swallowing sharply, the pain from the aftershock her assault seemed to shed from his skin. It was still something he would have to work through but tears pricked his eyes knowing she didn’t hate him the way he hated himself. That she was there, finally, solid—no longer the dissatisfaction of a dream. A lump in his throat began to build again, not for sadness, or failure, but because he was genuinely happy. So happy, that it weighted his muscles into exhaustion, finally being able to let his guard down because she was here, stabilizing him like she’d always done. ‘The ying and yang of it all,’ he thought, ‘finally in balance.’

——-  
Rey’s Room  
The Sea Falcon -5:45pm  
——-

“My Room is just to the left up here.” Rey navigates for Ben, still wrapped in towards his chest, key in hand. Rey slides it into park for him, pulling in and releasing a drawn-out breath of him before asking if he’d come in. 

Ben nods, “Let me get your board first,” he says quietly, trying to control the surge of adrenaline crushing through his body. He feels her nod and pushes up from his chest. It feels like every dream he’s had of her, the loss of her weight and smell would indicate the end of the dream. It would usually be accompanied by a searing golden light that would burn brightly to white before she’d be completely gone, dumping him back into reality. Not this time though, she’s just inches from him, in the passenger’s seat. Though...his heart still raced in the anticipation of trying to hold on to her. 

Rey looks over his expression of noticeable anguish, placing a hand over his chin, softly pulling at the sides of his jaw. Her breath shallows, studying his face before resting above his lips, “leave the board.” She manages, achingly slowly, matched with her own lump pulsing in her throat, “see that I... get ... in ...safely?” She leans another kiss into him. 

He manages a nod, some how, lips locked passionately on to hers. Fervidly, matching each of his covetous strokes of her tongue with his. Ben is quick to the passenger door. He wastes no time pulling her onto him in one easy scoop, taking her key from her and shouldering the car door closed before carrying her in his embrace to her door. Propping her up against it trying with shaking hands to line up the key to open her door. She soothes his frustration, pulling the key from him and inserting it instead. He stifles a moan, pushing open the door and letting it slam behind them from the weight alone. 

“Shower.” Rey slips from his lips, he raises from her, his eyes searching hers, knowing he could manage carrying her all the way there, but that’s not the question he wants answered, “you too...” she pleads. Ben obliges, stumbling slightly navigating through the tiny room. He could hold her for hours but puts her down hesitantly, like she’d disappear at the loss of their connection. He keeps tensing at the thought. Rey starts the water, looking for a hot enough temperature for the both of them, knowing from the night before that it can take a bit to get started. When she returns to him in this small space, his eyes are hooded, begging to know if this is really what she wants. She nods before accepting this, pulling up at the hem of his cotton guard shirt. 

He hates himself for having to ask her, but he pushes it out anyway, “are you...?”

“Clean?” She breathes, “Protected? Yes.” She senses his fear he’s not her first, “Ben,” she looks into his big brown eyes, “If it wasn’t you, it would never be another. The IUD is - I found out I have some blood mutation that clots and if I ever get pregnant it just means lots of shots and medicine so I don’t clot...it doesn’t matter right now. I’m protected for five years.”

Ben’s body goes cold. Frozen in place by the thought of having children but worse so that she could clot. And why per say did she find this out? 

Rey feels like she has to explain it, furthering the flighty need to run from this bathroom, “I only found out about it after a fight.” She’s written about it and is sure he’ll be looking to find out what else happened but for now, while she fucking just wants him, she’ll give the least amount of detail she can to get him going again.

His eyebrows lift in horror when she shows him the scar tissue under her top, nestled right under her arm, covered by it. It wasn’t just a gash, it looked like a chunk of her was missing, like it had been a shark attack. His heart constricted as he traced it with his fingertips, ‘who could possibly...’ 

Rey doesn’t let him ask, “I was fifteen. Mrs. Holdo said she found me in the gym. At the hospital they gave me a transfusion and that’s how we found out I had a strand of something they call Factor V. Whoever donated must have had one strand too, and having the two then in my bloodstream, I started to clot.”

She takes a steadying breath, “the only other way I can have troublt like that again is to be pregnant. And because I was basically alone, it was the safest thing to do. It’s since been replaced now that I’m twenty. The most it’s done for me is pretty much eliminate my cycle, so when I’m not in Jakku I’m not luring sharks at least,” she tries to make a joke. 

Ben can’t see past the mark, “Did you get him? The guy that did this to you? Is he still out there? Or in prison? Or... dead?” He fights the image of her left in a heap, almost bleeding out he’s sure of it, in a gym somewhere alone. 

“No, he was tall but it was late so not everything was powered up... I knew who she was though.” 

“She?”

“I can only assume the target. I’d met her before, once or twice in heats off the coast of Coruscant. For a huge city you’d think they’d have a larger, cleaner shore,” she shakes her head. “He was going to rape her—“ Rey covers her eyes trying to hide from her memories, “I just knew someone had to help and it had to be me. I should have called for someone, but I didn’t have a phone,” she shrugged, “so I bashed him with the rogue bar - I wasn’t careful but that thing is heavy. Once I put it down it was over.” She trails quietly. 

The sound of the water thundering through the shower stall is the only thing he can hear. He’s soft with her. Kissing her still sandy body, over the clear gash marks, “Rey,” he can’t bring himself to find the right words, any words through his rage for what that idiot had done to her. Choking tears back before they pool in his eyes still imagining her left and bleeding... “I’m—don’t ever leave again.”

“You have my word,” she draws her fingers through his hair, “Come on, I need a shower, and I may just pass out if I don’t eat anything,” her smile reaches her eyes, but she all business now, disrobing herself completely before ducking in. “Oh, tiny soaps, I forgot about this.” Her giggle rings over the sound of the shower. 

Ben is fighting a battle in his head over what he just heard and what he morally should be doing given the weight of all of it. He knows she won’t push him away, gulping down his fear, he gets ready to join her. Watching her silhouette accepting the hot water running through her hair over her bowed head, cascading over her perfection. Stepping forward, he pulls the curtain slightly to step in. It’s the smallest shower he’s ever seen. The corner setup has him gasping at the cold curtain folding in across his hot skin. 

Rey already working in the bits of shampoo she’d found in the tiny jars, welcomes him with a tug into her as if he wasn’t already practically standing on top of her to begin with. Without a second thought she’s switching places with him. Warming him, trying to calm him, reassuring him that the past is gone. She kneads soap into him, administering slow and steady passes over his muscular arms first. One and then the other, moving up over his shoulders, to his chest stopping purposely over his heart. Not that she didn’t think he actually needed a cleansing from the pain of the last six years, but she was more connected with it now, with his stress she just gave him. Rey wanted Ben’s clarity, his calm, and sex wasn’t going to pave that road. Enveloping him her arm around his waist, leaning a kiss onto his heart, she finally gets him to release his breath. 

Ben leans into her, landing kisses onto her lips. There’s so much he wants to say to her and all he can do is explore her, wanting to taste her everywhere. This tiny shower is not working for them and the ting from the hot water is starting to lose its ember. He’s tracing his fingers softly down her shoulders, passing over her back, pausing at her hips, circling his thumbs into her flesh, before he picks her up, swiveling her under the shower head.

Rey noticing the cooling water, picks up her luffa, lathering it into a mess of bubbles with the scrap of a piece of soap left from helping Ben. Rey rinses her hair and begins scrubbing the remaining sand off of her. Ben looks on, watching how the tiny bubbles hold onto her skin like a lace glove. She bends to draw the luffa over her feet, holding him for support. ‘Sand,” She says awkwardly, doing the first and then the other leg in its entirety. “Ok too cold!” She snorts turning it off. “That’ll be out for hours...”

Awkwardness takes over the pair in the tiny corner shower with the air cooling around them. Rey peels open the curtain slapping the inner plastic one against Ben’s calves. He lets out a surprised yelp at the cold curtain now stuck to his backside. Rey grimaces an apology for it grabbing at the wall for towels. Of course they’re cheep, small, thin, towels, looking like they were double the size of the hand towels folded on the vanity. Apologizing again, “this is awful, I’m sorry.” Rey dries off like she’s using a diving towel, exiting the shower, flushed from embarrassment even though she’s cold.

“Rey?” Ben stays standing in the shower’s basin wondering what she’s flustered about, “are you ok?” She’s gone from being extremely forward to losing her composure over a towel, “it’s- these places, it’s not a reflection of you.”

It’s been years of these places. Holdo figured it was better to be away from the older surfers who booked in high end hotels enjoying all of the amenities. They were older, that was her main concern, followed by the fact that Rey was beautiful, and she promised to protect her especially after the invasion of her privacy. It just was right for the time. And so it stayed. Rey, being petite, didn’t mind the small towels, a shower was work, not something to be enjoyed. Finding it enjoyable now with him here, she had no idea how to plan for this. 

When Rey would find herself in a predicament, she would lose herself. Her fight or flight was so strong within the polar opposites, finding no balance between. It was certainly something she needed help with. But how does anyone ask to be balanced? What do you even practice? 

Ben takes time to dry off before stepping out of the shower. “It’s really alright. At my place, when I first moved in, I didn’t have the outer shower curtain for like three months, until one of the older tenants started to complain that I was causing pools of water damage in his ceiling. We both couldn’t use our bathrooms for a week while the landlord fixed it.” He thinks about his story, “I know it’s not towels, but these things that happen —it’s life, you can’t control it. So don’t try to.”

Comfortable again, she reaches out around his waist, nuzzling into his chest, the both of them still bare. Clumsily, he tries running his fingers lightly through her wet hair. Rey wrinkles her nose as he does. She wants to love it but no conditioner equals sticky hair. Ben tries and fails to retract his digits from her head. He looks confused as to why he can’t get out when Rey smiles into him, “it’s a trap.”

A generous giggle envelops Ben even in this predicament. Frustrated, he leads her back to the shower to run the water over her hair to remove his hand. “Smart,” She’s able to praise this idea, actually wondering if it happens to him too now with his longer locks. She smiles at the sound of his approving sound.

Ben’s mind is complete mush trying to figure out how he’s going to turn on the water with Rey encircling his waist with her arms. “Do you think you could let go for a second?” His voice worried that she would. 

“Nope,” She pouts, “I’ve waited years for this Solo.”

“Oookay,” He says with mirth, he bends over her, down to the faucet head, turning it all the way back to hot, which let the water flow before changing the heat. It didn’t matter, the water was still ice cold. She squeaks at the bend, holding him tighter, awakening his growing girth, which has him holding his eyes shut for a moment. “Let go Rey. I have you.”

Rey feels his hand splayed over her back, holding her carefully as though she‘d been in some exotic dance with him. If that wasn’t exactly the case, his gaze removes her from the present. Letting her body into his hold, dipping her head back into the cold water. As his fingers loosen from her hair, she feels him smooth it back, her eyes slipping closed before he turns the water off.

Rey, who stays like this, enjoying feeling weightless is knowingly allowing Ben to drink her in, yet again. Her body betraying her love of this, begins to shiver, sweeping open her eyes she sees Ben fighting with himself. Calling his name softly, like a heavenly prayer, he returns to her, his eyes wide and wanting, “Please. Ben. Kiss me.”

Naturally, he listens, her body still bent backwards, hanging on his every movement, hoping he’ll stay with her. 

——-  
Afternoon Guard Shift  
Jakku Beach Guard Shack - 7:00pm  
——-

There’s chatter among the swell of guards passing through, getting ready to get their chores done before leaving for the night. “I can’t believe she’s back,” says Dee to James. “I though she said she wouldn’t. I wonder what changed.”

“Who’s Rey Kenobi?” Asks Lars a rookie guard, getting ready to erase the board. 

“Don’t you touch that!” Shocking the poor kid, Mr. Skywalker rises from his desk, like he’s an animal stalking its pray, “Who’s Rey Kenobi?” He shakes his head, “What rock have you been living under?” 

The guard just looks at him as he strides over to the bookshelves, bending to grab a fist full of ‘Peak’ a pro surfing magazine they subscribed to when Rey made the big time. “Why don’t you do some reading?”

Lars rolled his eyes, looking at the dates to find the earliest to start from there. The cover thankfully gave page numbers right on the front so he could easily flip to it and get this over with. He knew after seven was chore time and he was on garbage patrol. Thankfully they had a contract with the town to pick up garbage but each bag had to be filled, tied and pulled for the company to pick it up. If you fouled up the job, you had the responsibility of hauling it to the dump yourself and there was no way out of your shifts in the chair. So what that meant was that you used your down time to haul the garbage the next day whether you were on or off. It had happened to him a few times already and he wasn’t ready to do it for the fourth time this week. 

——-  
“Peak” - Prodigy Surfer: Rey Kenobi: 2012  
Pages 15-19  
——-

‘That’s odd,’ Lars thinks, ‘usually it’s a small section as a promotion of up and coming surfers.’ He’s seen enough surfing magazines to know this. Opening to page fifteen, he sees why. They printed two...two page spreads of her shredding ‘Mile 5’ like a professional. The pictures are outstanding, the wave in comparison to her childlike body ripping through the barrel is like something from movies. 

He moves over the pictures reading the content and returning to the weight of all of it.

‘Kenobi, prodigy well before fourteen, has been surfing her whole life. Credit’s her hero Kaydel Ko Connix for her undying interest in the sport. Best friends, Tico and Solo keep it fresh, ripping it up with Kenobi on Jakku Beach...’

The second page spread had her gaining air being spit out hard enough to try a kickflip. The sky above her seems to sparkle with the sunlight hitting the spray she had flown into. Lars studies it wondering how a such a little one would be able to pick up such a hard sport like surfing. ‘She’s so tiny’ he thought. 

She honored Armitage of all people for daring her to drop in unannounced in the contest which was just for adults. “He was so certain I wouldn’t do it. I remember patting his shoulder, grabbing my board and paddling out. Initially I just wanted to mess with him enough so he’d grow a shade or two paler, but as I got closer it just felt right. It’s not like I’d never done ‘Mile 5’ before.” She giggles, “it was my first time ignoring a contest rule though, I think it worked out.” Theres a picture of her holding her board and offering a shaka, smiling broadly walking back from the shore on page 19. 

He picks up the next one, on and on until he finds the last in the pile, noticing the time he knows it’s going to be an awful day tomorrow. Opening the article he notices her article is smaller and the light she’d been blessed with every time she smiled in all of those other pictures, is gone. The excerpt over her sad expression, tendrils blowing from her face, as she stairs hopelessly past the photographer. 

[Matt]: “...don’t you miss Jakku Beach?”  
[Rey]: “Yes...And that’s why I can never return.”

‘That’s messed up,’ he looks up from the table. Luke’s expression is cut from stone. “Now do you understand why?” Getting up from his chair. “Come on kid, we’ll get those garbages pulled tonight.”

——-  
Rose, Finn, Kaydel, Poe, and Captain Bridger  
Jakku Guard Apartments - Out Back Patio Space - 7:30pm  
——-

“Did you see her?!” Asks Finn finally finished with his shift. Afternoons always feel the longest, but Finn lucked out some how only having to break down the chairs in section eight and nine. “Hux had all day with Jess, we should invite them to food if they come past. I hate all day - hang on why didn’t Solo have all day today too?”

“Pretty sure it had to do with Rey,” laughs Captain Bridger.

“Spill Ezra,” Finn lifts his brow. 

“Weren’t you around when she took ‘Center Stage?’”

“I wasn’t here yet...” He only heard what guards were gossiping after the fact. 

“Oh well,” crossing his arms across his chest, “after she took so many runs we went to check on her. We asked if she needed anything and she asked for three things. She said ‘music’, ‘Rose Tico- because she hadn’t found her yet.’ And then, now I paraphrased because I knew people were listening...she goes, ‘I could really go for a date, maybe dinner with that delicious beast of a man Ben Solo.’”

Rose laughed so hard she started to choke on the dry air, clutching anything so she didn’t fall on her face laughing at Rey’s boldness. Once she found the ground she laughed until it finally ebbed moments after. “Of course she did.” Trying to keep her giggling at bay. Eventually she thought about how sweet it was that her friend was looking for her, and felt a little better that she asked for Rose before Ben, even though they’re together somewhere instead of catching up with her. 

Ezra nods taking a sip of his drink, “There was no way I was repeating that.” 

Rose starts losing her self again, sipping on some water so she doesn’t lose it completely. “Oh, oh my God, I can! Oh...”

Finn finishes the burgers off offering them up on a plate he’d brought out to the table. As everyone gathers Finn sees Hux and Jess, raising a burger to the air asking if they wanted one when a gull grabbed it right out of his hand. He ducks down in surprise initially. Then pops back up hollering at the sky rat. 

Jess makes her way over with a reluctant Hux in tow, reminding him its food he didn’t have to buy or cook.Jess thanks Finn for the offer and gets ready to sit down when Poe asks about shifts.

“What are your shifts tomorrow guys? I know Rey said she’d be back to her usual routines - it’d be nice to all go surfing or whatever she does in the morning,” says Poe, remembering Connix, “or body surfing or whatever.”

Cutting his discomfort, “Yoga starts the day, then surfing.. I’m morning shift but I’m going. You guys are free to join us if you want.” Says Rose. She’d honestly die to see Finn or Poe to do it too. “Rey asked what you had been up to too Kaydel.”

Kaydel perks up, “Oh?”

“Yeah, I told her you got into event planning and she seemed really happy for you. Who knows, she might want to get involved with your surfing events this summer.”

“That would be fantastic!” She looks at her phone, “I won’t be there until after 3:00pm though, I’m running all day tomorrow. Do you think she’ll still be here?”

“She told me she was home so I’m pretty sure, yes.” She grins. 

“Great and if not for whatever reason, give her my number?” 

“Sure thing!”

——-  
Rey’s Room  
Sea Falcon - 7:30pm  
——-  
Rey’s grumbling stomach is deafening. “Anything you think you’d like for dinner? I literally have a box of cereal here.”

He laughs at her suggesting they go out anyway so they can get a phone set up for her too. “Why do you want one now after all this time? I’d figure you’d be happy being off grid.”

“I am.” She smiles about it, “But Rose told me about Kaydel, and a strong part of me feels that I should do something for her, to fix her situation. I have the resources. They’re only ten digits away.” 

He exhales loudly, sitting next to her, “you’d face all of them for-“

“Someone I love.” This stills him, “Just as I love you.” He blinks at her, “I always have.” Telling him she loved him came natural and sure. It had first appeared in adoration notes in a journal marked for 2015. Having told him countless times, she had no reservation about saying it out loud. She was reassuring in this, holding his gaze and enjoying his warmth. 

“You love me?” He manages, his heart must have exploded and the after effects of it had to of numbed all of his senses, even his speech had been dulled to an inaudible sound. 

“I always have. It’s not some brand new thought brought on by these last few hours, Ben.” She smiles cheerfully at him, running her hands sweetly over his skin. “Just because this is new, doesn’t mean any of my feelings for you are.” 

He kisses her long and hard. She doesn’t need to hear the words. She knows he had. He was too good to her over too many years not to. What they just shared was far more than some physical activity ushering a dramatic need to get the other off. His mind raced back to all of those times she’d look at him, touch him, laugh at his jokes, all of the times he needed peace in his world, he had her, he had her love. “I love you too,” he inhales her exhaled moan, but before letting it go again, “Let’s go eat, and see if we can get you a phone...and... I - you don’t belong in a motel, Rey. would you, do you think you’d stay with me tonight—‘always?’ At my place?” 

Rey heard the fear in his question and promised herself she’d fix this with him, he wouldn’t have to be scared she’d leave or ever be alone again. A grin crept across her face. “I thought you’d never ask.”

He watches her slink from him, reminding himself over and over that she’s her and everything is fine. More than fine. She grabs a couple garments from her bag and scoots off to the bathroom, freshening up and returning to him clean and dressed. 

She’s dressed simply, ice blue tank top, warn denim dark wash shorts. She’s tied her hair up in a wet messy bun high on her head. Absentmindedly grabbing her flats from the bathroom floor where she’d left them the night before, she braces herself on the doorframe, lifting her foot behind her and sliding them on her heal. She daftly dose the second before catching him in his gaze. “Your turn,” she muses. Taking him in at all of his glory... “I’ll get these things ready here.”

Ben nods, but stares her down as if she’d become more beautiful clothed. Honestly he’d really ever seen her in her bathing suit or coverup, today he hit both of his other needs, to be with her in the buff, and enjoy her company clothed. He reluctantly gets up, striding towards her, giving her a small peck before cleaning up himself. Once he is, he redressed in his guard uniform, feeling a little silly. The blush in his face shows it. 

“Maybe we’ll just go through a drive through, ok?” She offers. 

“How do you know me so well?”

“I listen.” She smiled, “You don’t have to say a thing. You wear it on your face. You’ll always be heard.” She offers him a peck before taking his hand and her bag. She wasn’t kidding. She literally had clothes, a box of cereal, swim wear, books and her board. Small essentials like her wallet obviously, a little bit of make up, and a pair of sun glasses. He wonders how she was so efficient, but remembers her past, those tiny things she’d let slip just to him.

“And so will you.” He offers her a small smile, guiding her out from Room 540.


	3. Reaching For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey go have dinner, decide on not getting a phone, and retreat to his apartment. 
> 
> Some things within his walls take her by surprise, opening up more of their history. 
> 
> And then he finds her own surprise.

The sun is low but it’s still quite bright out, a speckling of clouds decorate the blue haze like paint splashes against the washed canvas. Though this day was ending, it felt like her life was just beginning. On the way out, Ben’s a gentleman, as always, opening and closing Rey’s door before getting in to driving to the nearest fast food drive through. Rey, thankful to finally have some sort of food, simply can’t wait to eat, opting in to unwrap and insert his straw before hers and picking through the fries in the bag offering to him first before inhaling hers. Like any significantly physical sport, it wasn’t weird for a woman to eat like one of the guys. They were burning through just as much as anyone else. Being a surfer to Rey was an all day event, which meant high calorie snacks were welcomed so long as they satisfied her fullness and wasn’t just packed with sugar or salt. 

Ben asks if it’s ok to go for a phone tomorrow night since he was sure they didn’t have much time before the shops closed. Being that Rey had her contacts with her in a book anyways, she opted to just wait on it all together. “I’m sure when I see Mr. Skywalker he’ll just let me use the one in the office.” She shrugs. “Probably best no one knows a solid number for me anyways,” offering another fry to Ben who mouths it from her hand instead. He’s actually thrilled that she wouldn’t put herself back fully into that circle. 

Remembering the logo on this particular bag of food, Rey smirks, “Remember when we kept tabs on how many times Poe said ‘Holla’ and we’d eat a slider until —we’ll you won?” Rey asks riffling through the bag.

‘That’s really going back, God he was sixteen when they did that.’ Ben grins, “That was the worst idea ever.”

She laughs popping another fry into her mouth, “I don’t think I ever puked so much in my life!”

“Didn’t we do that with Rose’s kimchi too?” 

“Oh no! I watched. That wasn’t me... wasn’t that with Jess? Right after ‘Hux’ was branded as ‘Hugs’ by her Mom.” Rey pretended to be her mom, “Hugs. I said that,” her face over accentuating like Jessika’s Mom, “H-U-G-G-C-K-S.” Rey corrects her again just like Jess did, “no Mom, H.U.X. Three letters.”

“Oh my God that’s right! Poe heard Jess correct her mom it and then he became ‘Hugs’” He starts laughing uncontrollably, a deep thundering laugh she knows has changed since they were kids, but certainly welcomed.

“And when Poe heard it he took that one right over. Poor Hugs, never had a chance.”

“I can’t wait to tell him that wasn’t his!” His grin has still dimpled through his cheeks at the excitement of reminding Poe. “Ugh that was awful though, I think I hate Kimchi for that reason.”

“Bleh,” sticking her tongue out, “it’s just gross... too much spice I think for me.” She shudders. 

He breaks from the memories to make sure she’s okay with retreating back to his apartment. Assuringly, she explains she’d rather be with him than in the motel room alone and it was really lovely that he’d been so kind to open his home to her. “It’s been a long time since I’ve belonged anywhere, Ben.” Rey offers softly to him, “I’m not going to miss being walled up in a tiny motel room missing you for another moment if I can help it.”

Ben nods, a couple bobs too many, as if he could relate. Did he relate? He was alone. Down time - ‘sleeping’ so he could remain alone. He didn’t want the noise of others if it wasn’t Rey. Presenting as an Alpha made that so much harder, especially being one of the head guards. It called attention to him all the time. Whether it was for a real or fake save, women would line the beach as if they were in line to show how well they could preform with every fluid movement. Though he’d never indulge, he’d be telling himself Rey would be back, and things would go back to normal even if he didn’t truly believe it.

Pulling into his spot, he releases another steadying sigh. “We’re going to bring your board in this time ok?” 

Rey smiles at his slight joke that teased himself more than her, “I have everything else,” collecting her bag, placing the burgers in it to free up her hands to bring in the drinks too. Stilling at the sound of her friends she notices that they all live there too. Rey is thrilled. She can’t even believe she’s gone from solitude to with everyone that’s ever meant everything to her. 

“I thought you might like this,” tugging at her hand to go in. “Let me get changed and we can come back down if you like.”

“I’m a little tired, honestly,” she yawns, “I think I’d rather curl up with you if it’s ok.”

The shock of it all shouldn’t be knocking him for a loop as it is. As if he thought that the time had come and gone, “Of course,” he pipes out. Six years had been a long time. Having had so many breakdowns about being left, though they weren’t an item, he couldn’t help but be a little terse, though he wanted his feelings to pour from him to her. He thought about how he’d tell her over and over again, daily. Sometimes multiple times a day. 

Walking back to the apartment, he felt weightless. ‘Her friends are here and she’s still chasing me.’

———  
Jakku Beachside Apartment Building  
8:15pm  
———  
The apartment complex is an angled horseshoe shaped building, that houses a courtyard filled with variations of tall and short palm trees, Crinum Lilies which were her favorite things until she put one in her hair and burned the skin above her ear, Rey actually gave the plant a dirty look while passing it. There were other plants and grasses that she didn’t know the names of but were beautiful in the collection of pots by the door. On both of the east and west sides there were balconies too suggesting those were also apartments as well. The front entrance matched the modern feel giving way to almost a tunnel before the double doors. Upon stepping in there were three elevators, obvious laid out for accessing the floors at a moments notice and stairways adjacent to them too. 

Incorporating land and sea in its airy, simplicity, the Oasis is set with the back of the building facing the ocean with panned windows set under balconies for each of its five stories, and span the entire east and west faces as well. It’s quite stunning. 

“Is this a Sophia Saché? The building? I remember seeing this somewhere -“ at his inquisitive regard, “maybe it’s not.”

“What do you mean, like the architect? I don’t know, honestly. May be Luke knows.” He thinks a minute. “Why? How have you seen this before? They just built it like right after you left.”

“I guess I caused a shift,” she laughs shaking her head, “I had finished every subject I needed to pass high school after two years on the road- a lot of travel time. Holdo suggested I start college remotely, so I took Intro to Modern Architecture 1 figuring it would be easy enough ... it wasn’t. I almost failed it. Too many dates and things to remember. But I remember this...I think? Maybe I’m just delusional.” Shaking her head, feeling silly for even bringing it up. 

“I don’t know about that, but we can look it up if you want.” He pulls out his phone, talks to it: “Search for Jakku Beach Oasis Apartment Complex Architect”

Rey looks on knowing Holdo used to do that for places to eat, like actual restaurants that didn’t have a ‘drive thru’. Holdo liked getting out of the van and walking around the towns they would stop at to make sure she could still use her left leg after driving for hours. 

The phone responds, “This is what I found for Jack Cubes and Oh’s..”

Ben tried again, “No. Search for Jakku Beach Oasis Apartment Complex Architect.”

“Did you mean...”Jax’s Pube Bee Wax?”

“Oh my God this phone....” he’s irritated now, “No. Sophia Saché Architect” 

“Did you mean...” Ben switches the phone off telling her to type it in the search menu. 

“Best we do this later- I’m not quite as advanced with these things.” Rey squeezes her shoulders together.

“Oh...yeah... anyway,” changing the subject, “practically everyone lives here except for some of the new guards. A lot of them still live at home. There’s not really a designated place for us to park so living across the way had its perks.” He explains crossing the terrace, “plus it gave my parents the space they needed.”

The last bit of that hung between them. Rey, unsure if she should ask, asks him, “how does it make you feel?”

Ben stops moving, as medically generic as the question seems, he can hear her desire to know his feelings on it. She’d been the only person he’d let in past the tabloids. Gossip was torture, grinding on every nerve. Bending to place the board on its rail before making a sound, he lifts to his full height, his eyes on hers until he looked up into the ceiling, rolling his neck over his shoulders. “I can breathe here.” He closes his eyes, his hair cascading down his back. Ben was not one for dramatic performances. Rey knew it was bad at home. Being on his own back then, even coming of age, was something she knew he needed.. knowing he was jealous of Rey’s life. “I wish things were different with them but they’re hard on each other,” he drops his head, “being blamed for it...” he trails. “This was necessary.”

Rey takes his hands, “I’m glad this works for you now.” Letting the moment pass he gathers her board and leads her up to his studio apartment. 

Outsiders wouldn’t understand the beauty of the white walls. Some would call it sparse or undecorated, but this was lovely. Jakku’s sunrises and sunsets were of the most vibrant, overtaking the whitewash like a raging fire. It was gorgeous, and she was glad to know he appreciated them too. Fully inside now, she takes a tour. Ben guides her around the foyer. A small table, she’s sure he made, adorns the right wall. Holding a handful of trinkets and an extra set of keys. Idly she wonders what those are for, then she looks up onto the wall. A photo she knew was taken but would never gain access to, is staring back at her. It’s matted and signed by her, back in 2012. “Ben,” Rey chokes, “where did you get this?”

The picture was taken from ‘Mile 5’ the day she dropped in changing her life forever. Ben stood behind her as she reached to touch it, “I chased down the photographer after finishing my run and basically skipped work the rest of the day hoping he captured us.” He swallows remembering her. He can still hear the thunder of the barrel, feel the spray on his skin and how fast he was going, realizing he wasn’t alone. Rey was low, hitting hard on rough patches of the wall, “you ducked down in a low lunge...”

“I was going to beat you to it.”

“And you did. You deserved that moment.”

Rey shuffled remembering the pressing of the wave beneath her board, like there was some force promoting the change. “The Kenobi Grab was created that day,” surging in front of him, “you could have gotten hurt.”

“You can’t hurt me. I was better than you.” Ben teases, Rey snorts. 

“You had experience.” Returning to her thoughts, “I was lucky you know. When I ripped into the shoulder trying to pull over the barrel, there was almost no shoulder to whip on. It was still too thin.” As the board made it up he moved his downward just so alleviating the space between them.

Still holding the rail she pulled right up and over him, her other arm stretched looking for his. She’d just grazed his shoulder before he reached for her, just missing each other as she pulled back down the barrel finishing out in the soup before her instead of completing the run with him. “I had no idea that would be our last time... it certainly wasn’t on my mind then when I asked you to sign the matte.”

The fact that she signed it not knowing he’d keep it was strange at the time, but not now, not after hearing how much it meant to him even being her younger self. Her hand starts to shake at her message to him: 

Solo-  
These moments will always be my favorite.   
XO - Rey Kenobi  
Mile 5 - 8.30.2012

“Did you mean that?” His voice lower than before.

Whispering in response, “yes. It’s not worth saying if it’s not the truth.” The corners of her mouth turn downward, a heaviness she’s experienced these last six years weighted her eyes and drown them in her pooling tears which she very clearly tried to shuck away. It was enough crying for the rest of the year. 

Rey Kenobi didn’t enjoy it. It reminded her of weakness. Holdo, who she began calling Mom at her first two months on the road, tried to tell her to listen to her body and just let it out. Opening in such a way was like opening Pandora’s box - the downward spiral that would come of it would have her incapable of speaking for days. Crying was a no.

She felt Ben behind her tugging at her bag’s strap, pulling her gently back, “c-careful, I, there’s sodas in there.” This was a trick she learned in Coruscant. Her bag was still stiff enough to keep them upright even on the ground. He shakes his head, turning to lean her board on the wall in front of them separating this space and his bedroom. 

To the left is his kitchen. From left to right filling in the corner space of his apartment, she scans for obvious appliances. Finding this amusing he explains they are set back into cabinets, concealing them from view. For a moment she wonders if that’s a fire hazard but then sees the electric stove top within the white granite counter top. Her eyebrows lift at the number of burners wondering what on earth people need six burners for. Her eyes follow Ben’s disinterest explaining his kitchen, finding the sink in the corner, followed by a wall pantry. In obvious range of his kitchen above the counter space below the granite, there were cabinets that reached the tall ceilings, some with glass framed out in a brushed nickel setting and others were stained with a grey wash. Had she looked up she would have seen the two hanging light box looking fixtures hanging several feet from the ceiling. A shorter peninsula jutted out from the wall furthest from them right next to the pantry. For a moment she places their drinks on to it and then her bag just below it at the side of one of his stools. 

Turning to accept the glow behind her rising in intensity, she notices barely notices a tv on the remaining left wall and then windows that gave way to a near panoramic view of Jakku Beach ‘Mile 5’ now at sunset, in front of her. The windows’ light blinds her from his living room set up. Ben watches as she stands motionless enjoying the view, “Ben this is beautiful.” Shadows pour over the oversized lazy boy recliner, couch and table in his living room. Vaguely she can see the silhouettes of a couple lamps and maybe books on small tables on either side of the couch. 

Pulling at her hand he guides her around towards the sliding doors, “just like you.” Rey steps within his stance, the awkwardness from the past hour burned away right back into the need she’d experienced at the top of his SUV. No one had called her beautiful before, besides Mom-Holdo. She’d been called an assortment of other lesser desirable words of attraction, and none of them would effect her this way. The fact that it was Ben, awoke something deep within her, past her initial boldness. 

Looking up into his eyes she sees something behind him that is hanging on the wall on strong hanging racks, “Did you..?” Behind him is his bedroom an ensuite tucked behind it, but that’s not what she sees. “You kept it.” She walks past him for a moment, toeing out of her flats before kneeling onto his bed to reach up at it. 

“You made it for me.” He watches as she kneels on the left side of his bed which he usually sleeps on, her knees separated as her body stretches to feel the balsa wood longboard she carved herself for him. “I still use it too.” He finds himself creeping forward slowly until he’s right up to the side of her, “it’s the best board I’ve ever had.” 

He gets caught in her backward straining gaze, this time he’s sure there’s no more distractions when he, himself sees it. ‘Why can’t I smell this?’ Lowering himself to her, his hand upon her lower back and left cradling her throat. Ben tries licking at it, and hears her whine. The sound threatens his vision. 

‘What?’ 

He remembers her stopping herself about her ‘womanly talks’ with Rose about her...’ what does that mean? Did she present? Didn’t she?’ He’s afraid to ask. He tries to remember if she does fall asleep to read Roses books first. When do young women present anyways? His brain is doing backflips trying to make sense of the development. For a moment he thinks he can, very faintly smell her. Ben tries leaving his lips upon her again, increasing pressure on her gland while she’s welcoming. Her body convulses dropping her to her knees, backing up sharply into him. “Why?” He can’t help the nerves take him over, “Why, Rey?”

She doesn’t want to respond. “Why what?” Instead her body starts to scream. 

“Why is this? Why is it so weak?” He presses on it again, “so small?”

“Stress. I’ve been dormant.” She drops her head back onto his shoulder as he hovers over her in that spot. “I thought...”

‘What?’ His beautiful face shows immense pain as if one of his own glands had been torn from his body.

“...it was over for me. I’m almost infertile... my gland is almost too small to provide anything for you.” Noticing Ben as her Alpha in her speech. The thought is pinning. 

Rey knew about presentations. She got the gist of it finishing Natural Sciences which was basically Sex Ed in high school years ago, and she was sure not in a classroom filled with peers to get any more of an ‘education’ from it. Life on the road after the incident made it hard for Rey to feel safe, which made her gland start receding. Instead of growing to allow searching Alpha’s passage, each year it would decrease in size, awfully. It felt like she was having it surgically removed without pain killers, by way of suctioning it out through unsterile needles. Stress was killing her. Being away from Ben she thought was doing it, until Snoke. 

Andrew Snoke, was tall, and thinner than most Alphas. Gangly alright, like a baby giraffe. His eyes were as cold as ice while he pinned her in a stare. His nose, short and stubby just like the rest of his face shape. Some would say he had a block head, it was noticeable even in the way his hair stood from it. He’d style it as if he was trying for a longer face all together. His mouth was always twisted up in a tight smirk or even worse propped open like he’d been waiting to be sucked off. His ears seemed to be plastered to his head, clearly not helping him hear anyone. He had this skater presence about him where he’d wear all things baggy, thinking it made him look taller. 

At first she didn’t know what to think of him, being the only person that spoke to her when she got in, Rey tried being respectful. He’d been pro since she was five, doing the simple math, he was twenty eight then, thirty two while she was fourteen. Rey could only imagine he was offering guidance. Andrew would make sure she got lunch or dinner depending on what time it was when Holdo couldn’t help her due to meetings. He’d introduce her around and offer training sessions with him, which Rey would turn down as she came up on her time to present. Rey would stay in for most of the day unless she was allowed to surf after schoolwork. 

He knew what she was, he was one of her peers on the circuit, best of the best, strongest Alpha representing the First Order sponsorship. His power wasn’t just over submissive omegas, but over both defiant and incapable ones too. At the time Rey was defiant, slowly loosing her battle of trying to avoid him, especially when he ended his rounds becoming an aid to the sport’s physicians. She only trusted two doctors, the first being Dr. Ashoka Tano who tended only to omegas, being one herself. 

And then there was Dr. Rian Johnson, who kept an eye out for severe physical injuries to all bodies and both sexes. He was kind, to the point, and excepted the very best out of every athlete that sought him out for assistance. Not one to lose his cool, Dr Rian would be firm, making sure that if there had been no reason for said injured surfer to still have problems, he would put their care on probation, until he knew said patient would comply. 

The practices as a whole had joined forces to offer services across the board and then entered Physical Therapist Andrew Snoke. Rey presented far before she knew what she was, pulling Snoke, hard and strong, despite his physique, would all but physically chase Rey publicly. She would deal with her injuries herself to avoid him. Finding a port-a-potty to stretch in so he wouldn’t sneak up behind her and massage out the muscles. 

Rey’s drawn back to Ben by the pressure he’s building between them. She feels him pick up speed with forceful laps over her gland. A warm haze similar to the beautiful mix of color with the setting sun fills her body. His body rises and falls with hers as she responds to this simple act. ‘Is this why they’ve always been within reach of each other?’ He can’t help but wonder. 

Ben is transported back to their coveted times together. As if the force of nature were surging the connection, pushing the need to protect one another. He remembers when Rey at nine, all of about seventy pounds started a fight with a patron over teasing him about acne on his back. Rey had a street ‘cred’ that was unsurpassable. Once crossed there was really no hope for said trouble makers. Her height would prove a problem to most fights, but when she had to, even the tallest would be brought to their knees. She’d expect an apology to Ben directly, even if he didn’t know it was happening. Every time she’d nod and stalk off back into the waves like she lived among them, like some myth to the shore. 

“Oh...” Rey whimpers, turning completely back into him. There’s never been a time she’s ever wanted to fix her predicament. Reading about it in some of her favorite racy novels, Rey can’t help but wonder if an Alpha, her Alpha, can actually do that for her. Heal her. Replace her balance. But right now all of her wants to know all of Ben, what changed in him from what she knew before to now. Why-how he got that much broader, how he wasn’t finished growing after adulthood... it didn’t make sense to her. Cut off for growth is usually right when men present. Curious, she’s had quite enough with the pressing of cotton and polyester to her exposed skin. Releasing him of his shirt, exposing him for his designation, even unable to smell his pheromones yet, she knows what he is. Hers. Made from the same clay. While she’s seen him, just hours before released of the confines of his clothing. Knowing he’s calling her to his side, promotes her to praise this sculpture before her. 

‘My omega hasn’t died. She’s dormant. Wake her Alpha.’ Her scent tries to speak for her.

She’s tentatively running her fingertips over him as though she’d not just been with him, as if her body is new...awake. Moving to kneel astride him, she can feel his determination. His need, calling for her over and over again like waves upon her skin. The deep pitted sound he makes when their eyes meet at her reveal, sends shivers through her body, leaving her crying through a whisper, “Alpha, wake my omega...please.”

Ben’s frame, taught with muscles, ripple beneath her. The coiling in his stomach had him jerking up hard into her still clothed body, his size straining in his ungiving shorts. Her request made him physically shake. This woman he respected, needed him. Him. He was sure to give her all she’d ever request after using his designation. Roughly pulling at her hips down onto him, promoting a string of whines and sighs. Ben can’t hear much else than her request to be freed? Saved? Balanced? He wanted this job, healing his Omega... ‘she doesn’t deserve this pain, her body being stripped of this,” he thinks of her gash. It has to have something to do with it. Deftly he removes her shirt, and bra, her skin glowing before him just as he does for her. While her chest rises and falls with her breath heavy with need, Ben looks away from it, returning to her injury. 

‘This,’ she thinks, knotting her fingers in his hair tightly. Rey can barely feel his hot saliva lapped on her scar, but all of the surrounding nerve endings sing blissfully in a language she can’t barely understand. Ancient- clearly, but desperately chanting as though a ritual was beginning. Ben was awakening her, healing the omega inside her from her coma. Waves in intense cold, dramatically crash into her threaten to break down her walls, clean her from the stress that had consumed her. “More,” Rey whines, “More, Ben, please...” she feels a surge fall from her center, still moving along him steadily. 

What was once a thought of endearing concern now turned into unbridled need. Ben’s eyes could no longer control the obvious desire that had taken him over. “Yes, Omega.” 

Rey loses herself. Her inner self stirs. She can vaguely hear him grit out his desires, suckling on her damaged skin. Her inner spirit speaks through her in a moan, “Again Alpha. Call me, oh!” She wails. 

“OMEGA” he growls, clutching her to him roughly, standing abruptly to pull her lowers off. Unbuttoning and lowering her zipper he pulls at her hips to lower them—swirly fisting then at the crotch feeling the obviousness of her arousal, ‘it’s working...’ “my beautiful, omega. You came back to me.” He says flipping their positions. He briefly lefts her go to remove himself from his shorts before crawling back over her working again at her gland. “I need to know.”

Ben himself hadn’t been with anyone else either. Rey was calling to a part of him that he himself had ignored, which is the reasoning for his considerable size. His excess testosterone and consistency with his workouts thickened him. Though unlike Rey’s gland, his stayed the same, uninterested in the obvious torment he was creating around him. Thankfully it was not the case being around so many at work. The majority of them were Alphas themselves. It made more sense for them to be in leading positions like ocean guarding or any type of strenuous or authoritative job, because Alphas were in charge. 

At Rey’s songs of pleasure, Ben’s body would move erratically. It would be the first time she released arousal to anyone besides her books. Steadying him with her touch, hooking her arms under his, palming him around his back, and digging her fingernails down into his shoulders. She gives him a solid pull. “Give me all you have.” She swallows, “you’re omega is awake,” she throws her legs around his waist, trying to rock into him, her lips now at his gland, “please, Alpha,”

It really should have just taken her first few words as rite of passage but when Rey speaks his body convulses in need. Any time she spoke back then, he gave her his full attention; who could have imagined that they were a match for each other back then? He knows he couldn’t have let her leave if he knew this. Would she have still gone? Her requests thunder through his mind bringing a soothing storm washing him clean of his stress. Hearing her final plea, ‘please, Alpha,’ sends him canting into her at a nervous pace, slipping over her with his considerable length. 

The animal side of his brain is getting frustrated he can’t just slap into her and grind her down to the pile of nothing she’s begging him for. She can feel it, releasing her claws from his back she combs the hair from the right side of his face, her pupils blown just as wide as his, “Ben.” She says to him, “slow down.” She kisses him. Soft presses and partings, “Speaking just as slowly between the two. “You’ve woken my omega.” Another kiss, “I don’t know how to control her,” followed by another. “Balance the urge,” followed by more, as he moves over her, “I’ve been alone for so long.” She hums in approval as his kisses explore her breasts. “You’ve given me a place to be...” she pauses releasing a moan as he diligently studies each breast, hovering on his forearms inches above her.

Where Alphas can usually go partially blind by their lover’s scent, Ben only loses his sight temporarily when she calls him by his designation. Wondering, idly if he can do that to her too, he purrs, “my omega,” softly into her flesh. Her hips buck hard up into his, feeling his impossibly hard cock, sandwiched between their stomachs. It spurs her to finish, her omega admits everything to him from him feeding her, to feeling finally protected, he can’t possibly imagine what else she’s admitted to in those journals but right now all he can focus on is her voice. Ben moves from her on a pull deep within him to reach her opening. 

His breath is heavier now, hot against her uttering her word back to her, “please”. The tinder in his voice clearly comes from the very back of his throat. From her experience, Alphas don’t say ‘please,’ they take without permission. Ben waited patiently while she stared down at him unable to make a sound, his hot breath panting, his hand flies below him trying to control his pulsing girth. Her eyes dart from him noticing his shoulder’s ginger obvious motion moving his bicep forward and back trying to alleviate the strain, “please.” 

He’s instant. Rey bows her back off of the bed at the pressure of his tongue slipping between her slick folds, catching at the top before lapping over her clit making her see stars. The light in the room has since changed as the sun has just a sliver of itself melting above the horizon, dimming Ben’s apartment just enough bringing in purple and pink strips of light right before the dark blue walls welcome the darkness of Jakku’s night sky. This change in light is faster than most elevations being right on the equator. In this time the colors painted on the walls felt like they’d been applied stroke by stroke of Ben’s delicate movements. Just as darkness fell, he’d inserted his third digit, and she came hard not ever feeling satisfied by her own administrations. Knowing, she could never compare again. 

Just the sight had Ben gasping. Their history together, her admission to him this evening, and now this... he was sure he should just have his release into carpet. ‘There’s no way, not after that...’ he can’t honestly remember anything from school. Had not having the interest in other women, there was no practice or knowledge from that either. Stroke for stroke, he lowers his head onto her mound panting it out when she smells him. 

Rey swallows hard, “Alpha...no...” she whines for him to stop, her omega could just die right now hearing him pound himself out. “Stop, please...”

This he can smell. Pain. Worry. Fear. It’s pungent, taking over her bliss. His head pops up, his eyes wide with worry himself, listening to her mewl. Her omega threatening her. He watches as she tries to get up unsure of what she needs. Her elbows proper her up just so she can look him in the eye when she begs him to fuck her. Ben’s eyes go wide- ‘exactly how many times can she get off? Is there an actual number?’ 

Opening her legs further to him, she urges him on, pouring her arousal from her while he rises to the mattress to cover her. Ben’s hands slip over her body, intentionally kneeling into her muscles, relaxing her fear, reassuring her omega that he was there for her, “I want to hear you scream omega.” He talks to her directly, “take all of me,” lining up with her swollen lips already leaking with her spend, pressing through her hot core, trying desperately not to come on entry. 

Rey’s body quakes with the pressing of his cock filling her so deliciously she’d gladly stay this way forever. Her mouth popped open, in a slight moan of his designation, Ben starts to move. His palms hover around the base of her spine, moving back and forth over her firm backside to her thighs before remaining on her rear as his pace quickened. Thrust after thrust she’d claw at him, screaming his name, how he felt, how good he was, her desire was blinding. He could feel himself hardening further, creating ridges that pinged through her so well she’d lift up toward him, even when he’d sit up for another angle. They were magnetized to each other, just as a true pair would be. He noticed his erratic thrusts taking over... he was close, “Rey,” he commanded, suckling on her tiny gland. 

She bent backwards in her climax from him, her eyes rolling back into her head, her chest pressed firmly into his, as she bucked into him, riding out yet another wave. Ben had just a couple more slams left in him before he too, poured himself into her. The strength of his body now weak before her, he strains out her name in such a peaceful call, before the couple is welcomed into a deep sleep.


	4. The Waves Crash In Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey spends her first ‘night’ with Ben. 
> 
> She reads the beggining of her first two months on the road. 
> 
> Ben’s Head almost explodes during their yoga session, his Alpha instincts are challenged. 
> 
> And then surfing. <3

Ben wakes to a start noticing Rey isn’t with him. His fears from years past threatening his sanity reaching out over the warm mattress. His visions. They would come to him, more and more vivid each time but this? He could still feel her. Groaning, Ben sat himself up about ready to start to cry when he saw her garments strewn over the floor. ‘She was here!’ 

He jumped up from the bed first checking the bathroom, not there. Then the living room, not there either. Tapping on one of the lamps, he noticed the chairs from his balcony back inside. Looking up he sees her. Relieved he’s not hallucinating, Ben studies her. She’s in her suit already. He carefully checks back at the time 2:41am. ‘Does she sleep?’ Ben spies her using his iPod and arm band she surely had to figure out how to attach to her tiny arms. He wondered what she was listening to while she practiced? He was sure her journals would tell him. It looked like some sort of mixed martial arts she knew when she was younger and fisted a small kendo stick, thrusting her motions quickly and stopping without a back swing unless it called for one. One motion after another. Deliberate. Controlled. As if she too was battling something within her that she knew she had to be ready for.

Ben sat on the couch, turning off the light next to him and watched. Rey would go on for another fifteen minutes before slowing, bowing to no one and then stretching it out. As she turned to face the window she visibly jumped a contained surprise though as she taught herself not to react. Ben’s massive shadow frightened her. She was sure he was still sleeping. Opening the sliding door, she apologized for the mess, and if she woke him. “I thought I was quiet. Did I wake you?”

“Yes. But not for sound.” Sensing her wasn’t as easy as it was when he was inches from her. Now with space he has to switch back from his instincts to a being normal functioning adult. He stands helping her move the chairs back outside.

“Why are you awake then?” He watches her cock her head to the side questioningly. 

Desperate wasn’t a good Alpha smell. It smelled worse than turned milk. Desperation wasn’t something he wanted to communicate with Rey. Fear too. It was a close second in rank smells he didn’t know if he could explain. But this was Rey, and Alpha or Omega or not, the truth was always something they had together. Ben swallows, “I thought you left.”

Rey’s face turns thoughtfully, “Why would I leave you?” She holds him steady, aware of herself, “Where would I go?”

Battling back the fact that she ran blindly away into the circuit to avoid anymore pain, he didn’t want to remind her that she’d already done it. “I don’t know,” he hangs his head. “Why are you up?”

“I’ve never really slept. The only times I could were on the beach,” ‘by your chair...’ “Here at home.” She squints a little when she says home. “I did get sleep though... being here.”

“What else do you do in the morning?”

“I used to write,” she offers a small smile. 

He’s not sure if this is the time but asks her if he could read them with her. “Is that ok?” Rey’s voice dips when she answers, leading him back to her bag, pulling out a shoebox of 4x6” journals. All black, marked by year, in a silver paint pen, still smelling a little from the permanent ink smell used years ago. Most of the books are hard cover, some are soft, still black, but leather instead of board. Placing the box down on the couch. Rey pulled the first one marked 2012, and slinked down by his side, pulling his arms around her as if he were a blanket she began to read. 

Certainly, Ben didn’t mind listening to Rey speak through them. It was like she was being the narrator of her own story. It was comforting to hear her responses to each page: 

“August 30th, 2012...”

Ben cringed.

“Mrs. Holdo said I had to write things down. Stress she said could crumble entire worlds and according to her, mine was just beginning. Surely not. I’d just run from home, in a smelly used bus, that smelled like it’s been scrubbed with old fish carcasses. I hung my head out the window today for air but she said no to that too because ‘it would end your life’. I’m already dead. Give me a better reason.

She had some choice words for me to set me straight but I’m in no mood for it. I may be a child but I’m no baby. I can have a piss fit if I want -I just walked away from everyone I’ve ever loved. Right.. too right, let me just fart rainbows and hug a tree because this hippie shit, writing out my feelings is really going to do me any good.”

‘Loved’ he thinks. 

“The thing is unless you have money or influence you’re nothing to the media. And whoever they are they’re the first to take all you have. So why talk? Write? Whatever...

Holdo says to talk... but who’s listening?”

 

“August 31, 2012: Nightmares.

“Read the article, it was the first time a tabloid didn’t lie.”

Ben’s Alpha is seething mad at this.

“I wish I wasn’t scared. I miss sleep.”

“September 1, 2012,” Rey sighs flipping through pages which by way of entry, were a handful of weeks regarding all of them as nightmares with little else to discuss.

 

“September 23, 2012

“Mrs. Holdo said I had to try harder with this. The therapist couldnt see someone who couldn’t speak past a few words. But nightmares are stress beacons I don’t want to aggravate. A nightmare is a nightmare and there are no heroes for them.

Therapist. Give me a break! I don’t need a therapist. I need a gym. An outlet- something to beat the shit out of. A therapist... what kind of girl does Holdo take me for?”

 

“September 24, 2012

“We talked again. Of course we did. There’s not a moment she’s not bringing it up. If I didn’t know any better I’d say she thought she was my Mom. I want to openly laugh about it but... part of me wonders what that role is like. What it’s like having one. I assume it’s like anything else. A relationship of sorts you can maybe rely on not stabbing you in the back. I’d love to think that... but mine did. 

Holdo said I need to take this seriously. Name the journal, like I’m talking to someone. Like I’m fucking crazy. So when they come for me -when I breakdown publicly, they can ask Holdo how long I’ve been like this. ‘Oh no officer I had no idea an imaginary friend could cause this devastation.’

The pages are pages. Pieces of paper. There’s no consciousness here. She pressed me again to think of who I’d want to see if not one more time just to apologize for leaving because it wasn’t just my world that had been destroyed. Instantly, I felt like a prick. Unworthy of everything I was offered. 

I answered her out loud: Ben Solo.

It shattered me.”

 

Ben leans kisses into her hair when she says his name. Her face puffy from pressing through each entry, Rey continues reading on through the end of September dealing with the changes in her routine, her signing with her sponsors and Holdo’s need to get out of the bus every five minutes.

 

“October 1, 2012

I’ve settled into a routine now, pretty much the same as I was used to in Jakku. Mom said I should work on getting back to a place I was comfortable, without actually returning to Jakku. 

She said I was controlling myself better. It felt good knowing talking to you could help me get here. Mom has me doing some version of homeschooling now too which is odd. There’s a lot of down time. Travel time. Mom doesn’t like planes, and I can’t drive yet so there’s that. Hours, Ben. Hours in the fish bus. If you ever get a fish bus, starve. Do not eat in there, or wait half a day before reentering. It’s a bus so it’s got a tiny door- not a sliding door like a van! Well we were stopped so I pulled the door open in traffic hurling my guts into the street. The looks I got had me offering rides in the fish bus. You too could loose ten pounds in a twenty minute ride! 

Mom yelled at me like your mom. Never felt so loved in my entire life. She told me the light change twice while I was out there. Oops!”

October’s entries had her explaining more school and her first acquaintances on the circuit. October is prime time for surfing on Coruscant. It was a known fact that the swells were far wider, the rip current much harder and one of the greats tried taking her under his wing. There were pictures of him with her in issues of Peak in the guard house, of Andrew Snoke with his arm around her shoulder, possessively. Ben tried to dismiss this since Rey could go toe to toe with anyone back then, if they weren’t welcome.

 

“October 15, 2012

I met Andrew Snoke. Ben, I wish you were here, always, but today I could have really used being in your company. I know I’m supposed to be able to trust this guy, but I don’t know if I can. Everything about him is messing me up. He poses with me at the fucking drop of a hat, like I’m in my fucking thirties looking for a mate. I haven’t even presented yet, and he’s fucking on me rubbing my shoulders. The guy has no idea what personal boundaries are. 

I shouldn’t have to feel the need to beat the piss out of people all of the time. I started brining my journal around claiming it was school work so he would shove off. I told Mom, but she said something about the First Order Apparel wanting to represent me too which meant I’d have to work with him. 

Mom said I could decline but it might make it harder for other sponsorships to advance. ‘Give it time,’ she said.”

 

“October 16, 2012

I asked Mom to run my phone over. She did without a second thought figuring I had my reasons. But then, she asked why. 

I told her someone keeps calling and never saying anything. All different numbers. It’s scaring me. So she ran it over with the fish bus. First time I actually liked that thing. The only trouble is you won’t know me when I call.”

Reading entry after entry some of her fear was released. Fear of not truly being heard, but not now, because right now Ben gave her all of the attention she could ever crave. He’d hold onto her protectively, remind her she was safe now, that no one could harm her. Still very early in the morning he had coaxed her back into his bed, still to read, but there he could hold her better. They’d spoon, fitting perfectly together, accepting kind little love nips and grinds that quickly became another round of discovery between the pair. 

———  
Jakku Beach - Southside ‘Mile 9’  
6:30am  
———

Rose is there before anyone else. She’s so excited she can’t see straight, putting her bag and short orange haze board down in the sand. This morning Rose packed one of her favorite breakfasts, fruit rings, which is a cereal, she’s had to explain this before. It’s basically the no sugar equivalent of Fruit Loops. Rose used to splash milk over it but the box would get mushy so she opted to just eat them dry like granola. She’s packed enough food for four people, knowing Rey rarely stops for food. 

Rose would separate her hair into two low pigtails, balling them in messy buns below her ear. She was wearing her guard suit so she didn’t have to stop early and go to work. Females had the choice of full suits or sports bra inspired bikinis. Rose went for the later. The ‘onesies’ as she’d call them, offered no support. She figured she’d rather adjust herself than have her cleavage pressed firmly against her body all day long. Over them she had her favorite purple cotton Jammie shorts, complete with frills over the legs and her guard shirt so she didn’t have to pack it. 

“You’re not guarding in that are you?” Teases Solo as the pair join Rose. 

Rose offers a choice finger behind her, unaware her friend is with him, “of course not, Solo,” it takes her a minute to remember to look. But when she does Rey is beaming by his side. “Oh! My! God!”

Rey squeals running from Ben’s side over to Rose. He’s a little annoyed by this but Rose was her friend first. And a woman. ‘It’s ok if she’s with them.’ Rey hasn’t bothered with shorts, but did stuff them in her bag. Ben offered her a shirt, wanting his scent with her today, always. He fucking loved it this morning when she put it on, flipped her hair out of it and knitted it to the side of her hip. It took all of his strength not to hold her to the bed and give her a knot of his own. ‘Should have done that earlier,’ he scolds himself, ‘surfing’ he thought, ‘we’re here to surf.’ 

A couple more people show up just at sunrise and the girls are wondering if they should ‘teach’ a class or just do their own thing? “I’ve never taught it, I’m not even sure what you’re supposed to say.” She gives the names of positions she’s been doing lately. 

Rose looks them up and laughs, “I don’t know about that third crow one.. but I think we can handle this. Just call them out ok?” 

Ben still holding his board, goes to set it by the guard chair, not particularly interested in yoga. Staring down Rey? Yes. Yoga -absolutely not.

“What’s the matter, buddy? Not going to try? Not even for Rey?” Poe teases. 

Ben didn’t even see him there until Poe spoke up. He was too worried about keeping his thoughts in check. The thought of quitting last night ran through his mind just so he could spend every waking moment with her. He wanted to right her world, however mentally or physically rewarding that would be. He loved knowing Rey had his scent even if she couldn’t completely react to it. Poe does though when he leans in for a hug. Even his side hug is aware of him, darting an eye up at Ben’s smug expression in the chair. 

Finn too, but for another reason all together. Finn presented as an omega which meant he could smell Ben differently. He wasn’t off-putting but he also wasn’t desirable. While designation wasn’t a common thing to strike up a conversation about, it did mess with Ben that they were able to linger without a changing glare. 

“Yoga is about breathing and control.” Said Rose as she guided the guys over, “you’re welcome to try but this isn’t a class.” The girls set their boards pointed towards the ocean so they can focus on the rising sun. 

Rey begins breathing deeply changing positions allowing time for Rose to follow. Ben, similar to yesterday, can’t hide his enthusiasm. Finn and Poe both try, chucking between each other on how easy some of these poses are, when Rey ups the ante to wheel pose. Ben is transported back to the motel shower with a groan, particularly thankful she’s wearing his shirt so he doesn’t make a scene out here in front of her friends. Their friends? Does it really matter? People.. they’re people.. can’t. Public. He tries tearing his eyes from her staring down now at his sandy feet. ‘Yes. Good.’

Rose keeps up but Poe falls on his head with a grunt pulling sand well onto his board as he turns over, making so much noise about that one being hard that Finn just stops and waits. Poe jabs at Finn nodding to the chair where Ben clearly looks like he’s losing his mind. “Serves him right trying to mark her.” The guys have a laugh not listening to the girls anymore. 

Rey’s since moved into her headstand which even Rose is done trying to do. Releasing a sigh and walking it back down into downward facing dog, she stands back on her heels wondering what everyone was staring at, “like I said, not a teacher.” Looking around she got a kick out of Finn and Poe making a turtle out of sand on Poe’s board, “surfing with a mate today are we?”

Both of them pop up, eyeing past her to Ben who is cradling his face in his hands, “you tell us...”

Grinning wildly, “that is not what I meant,” gritting her teeth trying to contain her enjoyment, “but I won’t deny it!” She mouths. The guys gape at her giving a golf clap of sorts. “You just wish it was you,” She teases. 

“I know it’s corny as hell but, I have music from when we were— well before you left,” Rose says now sheepishly. “If you...”

Rey’s eyes look like they’ve exploded with excitement. “You brought music?!” Rey squeals. Her friend instantly feels better with her decision pulling a set of speakers out of her bag setting it on the guard chair. She plugs her phone into it and cranks it as high as it would go. Oh boy what a throwback! Rey’s body feels like its changing. Moving back within time to her more natural self. Rey nods to get ready, releasing Ben’s knot, before taking his shirt off and folding it neatly, taking care in how she placed it in her bag. She pulls up her board next to her left side, reaching up at the guard stand as high as she could, pulling her hand softly down the back of Ben’s leg, retrieving him from his thoughts, “coming?”

‘Did she fucking know?’ “Uh Yeah...” he jumps from the side of the stand to grab his board.

“RACE YA!” Rose piped ripping Rey’s amusement from Ben’s grimace. The girls race off into the warm waters of Mile 9. Diving down under each wave to get far enough back behind them the girls are the first out, watching the guys. “Ooook! Spill!” 

“A lady doesn’t kiss and tell..”

“You’re no lady..” Rose snorts.

“True—so true!” Rey cackles. “We’re still catching up if you catch my drift.”

Rose damn well lost it. “No way!” 

“To be continued,” she motions behind them. Poe and Finn are trying to make their way through the waves with the sand sculpture on Poe’s board, which leaves Ben. No longer on the beach, Rey’s head actually swivels wondering where he is. 

Ben’s strength surpassed hers being able to hold his breath longer and power through swimming through a wave longer. His strong legs could move more water, the board she made him made it easier to cut underneath giving him the right amount of support to handle his large scale back then. He loved the way it would glide evenly under the water like a torpedo... but loved it more because she made it. Today, it made him happy to know she would see it in use after all this time. Like she never left. He surfaces watching her relief finding him, that he’s sure he had riddled on his face when he couldn’t find her this morning. 

Rey’s face constricted and her mouth dropped open slowly as he pulled himself through the evening of the ocean where they were perched waiting for their crew. Reach after reach, Rose began seeing their chemistry was far more than expected. “Should I get you a room?”

“Yeah maybe...” Rey tried whispering, but it was too late. Ben heard. 

Finn piped, “Poe’s turtle made it!” Fizzling the feeling entirely. The group, all but Poe barked in laughter. “Ok now that that’s over. Let’s surf.”

“Any games were looking to play?” Rey asks. The group looks at Rey questioningly. Games were brought on by her circuit. “Sorry I forgot...” 

Games she’d known on the circuit. Rey fit better as one of the guys usually but had some close girlfriends as she got along in years. Games meant they were being wild pushing each other to their limits, she thinks of the twins. Being home again after all this time, she didn’t know what they could do now. Games would have to wait.

“Freeform?” Offers Finn. 

They agree. Freeform. “Race you!” Teased Ben as he leans in to catch the next wave. God! Ben was so much faster now. This was going to be a morning! His hugeness glided through the ocean with ease, obviously effecting her, and goddamn if he has that cocky look when he looks back at her too. He drinks in her ‘oh shit face’ thinking ‘game on Solo’ when she mouths ‘Let’s play Alpha.’ 

The two drop in one after the other on the short three foot waves. Ben takes off facing the shallow wave, his height making him look like he was floating. Dipping lower to drive board through the rest of the wave faster than Rey. ‘What a damned distraction, she though, now having to stay in line with him since the wave started breaking up. As the wave breaks, Ben looks back over his shoulder, reminiscent of how she looked at him last night. 

Rey couldn’t help but openly gawk at him, taking in the way he ripped that wave apart like nothing. Yes ok, they’re in small swells this morning but this is her usual routine. Kaydel always said ‘a good surfer knows their preference while a great one can surf anything.” He’d low, then high, whip through the crest and peel back like it was nothing in that tight space. Rey drops her head back, standing tall now on her board ready to coast in to dive back under. ‘I should never have goaded him on. That was a clear show of dominance and skill...this... he’s speaking my language.’ And fuck if he’s not watching her response with need. He’s all of ten feet out but his stare has her panting as if he’s right in front of her face. Thankfully not—Finn hollers a noise that couldn’t have been English landing a kick flip. He claps hard, tensing his whole body, surely proud of himself. Poe drops in with his sad glob of a turtle, losing it completely, raising his hands in frustration while getting caught in the crashing foam. Though he doesn’t waiver while riding it out. 

Rose though. Shit. Rose looked like a pro. She would flirt at the crest riding high like it was normal. Rey let out a howl for her friend that surged through the guys to check back. Rose pulled her board tightly down the face and back up creating enough speed for incredible air, shucking her high enough to land back down in front of the barrel before fizzling out. Rey was so proud of it she visibly shook with chills. When Rose came back up, Rey howled again, “that was amazing!” Prompting Rose to bow of course since curtsying was for little girl tea parties. 

“We’ll need deeper swells but, how do you feel about a game?” 

Rose picks at her ear, “what kind?” 

She asks if they’d like to play ‘Horse’, “just have to get all the significant moves in before the end of the wave.”

The group agrees that’s fine. Deciding on who goes first, Rey wants to say, Solo, but picks Rose after that run. The girls walk back to grab the music and their bags when Hux goes flying by with the rake swirling up a cloud of sand at his pass. “What’s all this?” He shouts mostly at Rose who knows the music shouldn’t be blasting at seven in the morning, “you know there are laws against this.”

“Laws on fun?” Rey questions, “if you really wanted to join us all you have to do is ask...” before he can make a sound, she offers to teach him some basics, “find a board and I’ll teach you in the afternoon.”

Rey watched as he made up his mind about this and nodded. 

“Give me a citing if you have to but I’m pretty sure if your patrons knew it was me all about my music they wouldn’t have a problem with it.” One of Rey’s legs bow out changing her stance with him, “come on Hugs...can’t you play?” Rey bends to pull her bag over her shoulder in a guiding manner, “we’ll be headed over there. Deeper swells.”

Hux stammers out a question in terms of giving her a ride, and Roses face turns bright red. 

“Thanks Hux, but these legs wouldn’t be quite as strong if I accepted rides from just anyone.” And goddamn If Ben fucking hears that one. His soaked frame stalks up to them, board on its side pulled against his body, the residual foam from the latest wave still decorating his chest, flipping his hair to the side removing half of the mess, and raking back the other. For a moment she thinks he’s the embodiment of all of the men from the romance novels she’s been hooked on now for years in her solitude. As if he gained features based on her endearing need for the characters in each novel to find their soulmates within each beautiful pairing. If it weren’t for those strong legs, she would lay crippled, she was sure of it, by the intense stare he was giving her. 

Was he mad? His face didn’t seem to show it... though there was a look, a commanding one, but who was he speaking to? The sunrise began to kiss the streaks of ocean spray leaving his skin. Her want is painted on her face, unable to be ignored. He looks down at her, his instincts want to command her, but he doesn’t. Part of her wishes she knew what that was like, especially being whitness to everything she’s ever experienced with him. Omega or not, she would listen. He smirks at her as if he has an idea what she’s thinking.

Reaching her, he offers to take her bag. It’s not something she can reject, she knows. The symbolism of their blossoming relationship is there in every movement. She offers it to him in silence, stealing his shirt again from it. Slamming her board down on a wedge she leaves it standing, looking at him with challenging eyes as she pulls on his shirt, reveling in his scent. Ben’s eyes close and reopen with need, finding her reset the knot at her hip. All she has to do is speak a word and he’d skip work today. Every day. He watches her remove her board, pulling it to her right side as if to shield her body from Hux. Her body, visible to him— some suggestive nonverbal conversation screaming between them, when she finally confirms their coupling, hooking her arm with his. The way she slowly captures his bicep, lightly dragging her fingertips over his forearm, pooling down into his waiting hand, lacing her fingers with him. She publicly was staking her claim, promising her to him, in front of her friends. Ben strangled a moan in the back of his throat, knowing exactly what she was doing. Thankful for this. For her. 

“Coming?” She pipes. 

‘God Rey!’ He squeezes her hand. 

——-  
Jakku Beach - Mile 7  
‘Horse’ - 8:00am  
———

The crew minus Hux are deep into their game of ‘Horse’. So far Ben, Rey and Rose have ‘HO’, while Poe has had some bad runs at ‘HOR’, Finn almost out with ‘HORS’, Rey of course asking, “if you were an hors d'oeuvre, what kind would you be?”

Finn grins, emitting a half chuckle, “what?”

“HORS, time to talk food. What would you be?”

“Can I be chocolate fondue?”

Rey starts to laugh, crossing her arms over her torso, “I-, ok. What food are you dipping?”

Quirking an eyebrow after that show with Ben at Mile 9, who is slowly approaching, “how about a strawberry?”

“You dirty thing!” Rey splashes Finn. “Did you get a letter?” Asking Ben who is a little annoyed she didn’t watch. 

“Yeah. Thought I had more time.” He shrugs. There’s a sadness in his voice that she can’t place which tugs at her.

“Breakfast after this?” Her eyes flick up to his hoping this will help him know when he’ll have her full attention again. His smile is reassuring. “Good. I’m hungry...”

“Your turn.” He can’t help but want to move this along. 

Rey drops in the very next one. This wave is thankfully strong prompting her to streak through the width of it, doing her signature move, whipping around the crest, pulling down and in hard around the barrel, only to push back up with an insane amount of speed, flying high over the wave, pulling out a back flip, landing just as gracefully as she left with. 

“Well... this game is over.” Says Poe flailing his arms in defeat.


	5. Answering The Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey catches up with her friends after surfing, walking back to the Guard Shack, giving Rose her books. 
> 
> The couple do breakfast. 
> 
> Rey meets up with Luke, calls Mom, and finds Ben’s boldness arousing. 
> 
> Head Guard Solo rushes in to save Rey.

Being only on Mile 7 there’s still an Mile and a half walk to the guard shack and home. The walk isn’t something Ben wants to deal with right now, but the trouble is they’re half way from the shack and the same distance from his ride. It makes no sense to walk back when in the same amount of time they could be back up in his apartment having ‘breakfast.’ As they walk with the group the evidence of the sand being pulled is present in thin rises and falls, uniforming its levelness. “Hux is going to lose his mind!” Finn spouts, “my lines!”

Poe laughs goofily, “Hugs you mean. Let’s see how many people we can get to call him that today. Extra points if you get a visitor to do it to. Even better if you can get kids to do it—they’re ruthless.” He claps his hands. 

“Speaking of,” Rey shoulders into Ben pulling him from his careful thoughts, abruptly switching sides with her, shielding her from her memories as they passed the bathroom. Her eyes never leaving his, “We remembered the ‘Hugs’ origin story last night...”

“Oh?” Poe was sure it was him, but nodded in Ben’s direction asking him to share.

“Jess’s Mom couldn’t pronounce it.” He said. 

Rey imitated it again for the group to hear complete with facial expressions. Rose lit up, “that was the day of the kimchi challenge!”

The group let out moans of discomfort. “No one should eat kimchi like that.” Poe admitted, “Luke let me go home early. No amount of Imodium fixed the runs that day.”

“Too far Poe, too far.” Rose replies.

They have a laugh noting someone should just get Jess’s Mom to follow Hugs around and see how long it takes before he loses his mind. Small talk fills the group all wanting to know Rey’s plans now that she’s back. 

“Were you looking for a place yet?” Asks Finn. 

“She has one.” Ben proudly spouts. 

Poe lifts an eyebrow, “Oh really?”

“She’s with me.”

“That was fast.”

“Not really...” he smiles at her, “you’re place is with me.”

It stills the group. 

“It is.” Rey admits. “And you with me, Solo.” Ben sucks in a quick breath. “It’s been a long time coming.”

Ben would give anything to be in their apartment right now, chomping down without mercy on his bottom lip to control his smell, not to make it uncomfortable for her among her friends. His thoughts start to fade as he feels her head rest against his arm. 

“I need to call Mom today...do you think Mr. Skywalker will let me use the phone?” Rey asks. 

The group gives her approving remarks at the same time which she blushes at and then, she finds herself having to explain. “Tell them about the fish bus,” Ben actually laughs. Good lord what an amazing sound! 

Rey does. “That bus! God we got it as a rental, as in we could give it back and try a different one. But Mom thought it added character... and a smell that would bake in the hot sun. It didn’t matter how much I showered. I’m sure I smelled like chum at all hours of the day.”

The group laughed all the way to the shack when Poe finally asks, “you found your mom?”

“Mrs. Holdo.”

“She’s your mom?!”

“No! I started calling her that on tour, that’s all. Kind of stuck. Kind of nice.” She smiles, finally at the bottom of the stairs of the Guard house. “Oh Rose, I have something for you.”

“For me?”

Rey explains, “while I was on the road, Mom told me to keep journals, and I have a box of them for you. It’s all the things I’d see that reminded me of you over the years.” Her friend overwhelmed with the thoughtfulness starts fanning her face trying to keep the emotion out of her eyes.

‘Shit’ Ben thinks. ‘Woman things... crap now I have to figure out he’d get that information.’

“Thank you Rey. It’d be a good read when I’m down if you have them now.”

Rey offers them from her bag also in a shoe box. Hers are in all variations of color, all marked on the binding as years just like his. But one specifically is all red with black marker on the binding. ‘That’s the one I need,’ he thinks. ‘Pre-fucking-senting,’ now just how was he going to get it?

“Wow, thank you,” she offers Rey a hug. Rey just smiles not sure if ‘you’re welcome’ is an acceptable response. 

Poe calls to Rey, “Luke’s not here yet, do you want to wait here or?”

“We’ll be back,” she assures them. “Breakfast,” she winks. “Can we leave our boards here?”

At Poe’s nod the pair walk back towards the Oasis, Rey turning, still clutching Ben’s arm, offers a beaming grin and quick wave, under Ben’s side stare with a smirk playing neatly on his lips. 

——-  
The Oasis - Stairwell  
9:15am  
——-

Nine fifteen means there’s no prying eyes. The majority of the staff is up or sleeping still. Rey releases a whinny of a squeal when Ben tugs her into the stairwell. ‘Should have shot for the elevator,’ he child’s himself. His want is maturing into full desire, destroying any hopes of laying her on his bed. Her short breaths egg him on, his blood surging through him, this morning raging through his mind. All she said. All she did. And under the mask of the sea salt, and his musk still pleasantly thick, is her. Rey. She’s faint but fighting through the mixture of him and this morning. ‘She can’t be broken if I can smell her’ he thinks. A level of jubilation courses through him knowing he must be the source of her healing, finding himself hoisting her up, lurching claiming kisses into her. 

Ben only sees Rey’s healing as if her aura had begun to glow again. The sound of her pleads goad him on. He can feel how secured she is holding tightly to him with those legs...she rocks on to him. Chills race around his body at her desperation to have him closer. Desperation on Rey smells sweet like dried figs and honey and him at her collar. 

Her fingers travel up his chest, purposely pressing her thumbs into his glands, raking into his hair. She revels in the way his body rises and falls with hers, guided by the dance of their unyielding kiss. She loved to see the effect she had on him when she’d flutter open her eyes, catching his jaw’s muscles flick as he generously gave all he was in each breath. 

“Alpha please...” she begs between breaths. Ben wants to collapse, but the carnal need she whispers over his lips, tells him to stay up.

‘My omega begs for me. My Rey begs for me.’

“I’ve got you,” he purrs into her neck, pushing her lowers to the side, he slips finger over her. Her readiness has him seeing stars, to be wanted by her, makes him swoon. Dipping lower he caresses little circles high into her hamstrings at the base of her rear sending heat trough her body. Her want evidently gushing over the slow rhythmic pressure he’s applying with the side of his digit. Rey is slipping through waves of ecstasy, and he hasn’t even entered her. The tingle from where he massages both places has her crashing hard, tightening around him begging for him, calling his name over and over mixed with pleas for him to plunge himself deep inside her. Ben can only grunt through this, ‘stairwell’ he thought, ‘fucking stairwell,’ when he hears her begging for his bed, his knot, everything, shuddering a moan, “Alpha, please...I need you.” 

In that moment he feels the strength in him build, he could haul her to his room from the stairs but the elevators faster, “come on” he works her and stops, wondering why she’s arching backwards into the wall, keening for him. ‘I just said come on as in let’s go...why?’ And then he feels it, ‘she actually—oh my God...’ 

Ben cradles her limp and shuddering body out into the lobby to get to an elevator fast. He’s hit every button to see which is the fastest. Of course it takes a few minutes and he’s suppressing the need to just take her here for all to see. The sharp sound of the elevators arrival startled him. It has him surging forward thankful to have an empty lift. Pressing his number and the door closed button at least one hundred times, Rey bubbles, “should I be jealous of the elevator panel?”

Pausing through the hard thought of him fingering the button, he playfully growls at her, nipping at her gland. His grip on her has since tightened when she returns the favor. Her breath so hot on his skin, first grazing his gland with her teeth, gaining almost a whimper from him. The sound is thrilling. Ben’s breathing becomes ragged pleading with her to wait until they get into their apartment. 

‘He said their apartment,’ she bites her lip, ‘he meant it.’ The joy from this squeezed at her heart, just barely making it to his bed she does it again, this time with far more pressure.

“Rey!” He roars through a need she finds exhilarating. Dropping her bag by the the edge of the bed, he sets her down for seconds stripping themselves in record time. Time for foreplay has passed, she’s called him Alpha, begged for him, came on command, bit his gland, and as his eyes dilate locked with hers, he breathes a command, something he himself is unaware he’s doing, until her body language changes to a fluent movement. “We are aren’t we, omega?”

She looks over her shoulder at him questioningly, “we are what? Alpha..” falling to her hands and knees, pushing a curve down in her back like a cat stretching out after a luxurious nap.

Ben’s eyes go wide, her slick evident, shining in the light of the morning between her thighs. Breathing out harshly, he lines himself up, petting his tip against her sensitive folds, “made for each other,” He grits out slamming into her. ‘Oh’ the way she whines for him, he’s sure she could cripple him just the way she sings ‘yes.’ In this moment, in their bliss, in the promises they make each other they find their release. 

Rey pleads as he starts to swell, for him to hold her close, like he did the night before. His knot alarms him enough, wondering how she’s able to take him at this size, and if it’s ever going to stop growing. He tries evening his breathing at her embrace. Petting her hair softly from her face he sees her contentment, dropping his nerves, letting his full spend rope through her body. ‘Trust,’ he thinks, ‘this is trust. Trust that I won’t hurt her.’ Pulling her close, careful to move, they whisper promises to always love each other, and to wake at ten him if he passes out at the thought. Which he does. 

——-  
Guard House  
10:30am  
——-

Rey watches on as Ben takes off up the beach to the north side on a quad, made specifically for head guards on roving duty, feeling like she’s watching her mate leave for work. She smirks at herself, feeling the remaining flesh of her bottom lip slide from the grab of her teeth. Uncrossing her arms, she strides inside to wait for Mr. Skywalker. Guards slip in and out throughout the hour going to lunch or eating in. Among them is Rose, Poe and Finn, who see her sitting cross legged in on the floor next to Kaydel’s desk. 

“Peanut?” Finn tries an old nickname from when they were kids. 

Rey pops up with the look of surprise and sheer happiness, rising up to hug Finn, “I haven’t heard that in the longest time!”

“It’s so good to see you,” he hugs her back the way old friends would, then stretching out to look at her face, “How was breakfast?” 

It’s all within his grin and the way she says it, that pushes her, “Delicious. Heartiest meal I’ve ever had,” giving way to a low gurgle in her stomach, a wide grin on her lips and red blush on her cheeks. 

The both of them cackle like schoolmates. Poe and Rose bring out their lunches and go to sit down, “why don’t you sit at the table?” Offers Poe curious as ever. “What’s all that?” Pointing at the book and paper she swiped from the printer and folded in half. 

Rey raises the collection of items to cover her mouth, “Can you keep a secret?” 

Rose and Poe both lean in and nod, listening intently, while Finn slaps his hands down now sitting at the table and leaning back in his chair, “No. Not at all. Terrible at it.” He giggles helplessly at Rey who swats him, knowing full well he can.

“Ok,” Rey kneels on her chair leaning into the group with her address book and notes. “Rose told me about Kaydel’s accident,” Poe stiffens and Rey reaches out to him, covering her hand with his, understanding the strain on their relationship because of it. “During ‘The Rise of the Golden Moon Festival’ I’m looking to set up a fundraiser to aid Kaydel in a full recovery surgery with the best doctors in the field.” Poe shakes, “she’s my hero, Poe. I may have credited Hugs for daring me to join the contest, but it was Kaydel who inspired me. I owe her this.”

No one makes a sound. No one has to. “First though, I need to call Mom. Do you think Mr.—“

“Yes, Rey.” An old man’s voice rings over her question. Rey rises, her hand leaving Poe’s to skim the table before reaching her side. She turns to see him standing in the doorway. 

“Mr. Skywalker!” She runs to hug him. At his surprise, her strength still knocks the wind out of him.

“Easy! And since you’re older, please, it’s just Luke.” Rey nods accepting his request. “So, Mom is it?” Rey explains. “Oh, she must be honored.” 

She shakes her head with mirth. Rey never saw herself as something worth keeping until Holdo spent all that time on the road with her. Her own children were in college and married, she was sure Rey was a hobby for a while there, until she started accepting being called Mom that is. “I’m not sure...I just started saying it one day, and she didn’t seem annoyed by it.” She shrugs. 

“So what’s this I hear about the festival?” He raises a brow. Rey explains again, “it’s the right thing to do.”

“If something happens though, don’t run. We’re here. This is your family.” He says reassuringly. At her nod, “You can use this office phone for whatever you need,” He shakes his head, “don’t use Kaydel’s or she’ll know.”

Rey smiles softly thanking him before kneeling again in the folding chair on the other side of his desk, reaching for his phone. There’s an eerie silence she’s very much aware of when she punches out the number without looking for it. Lifting the phone from the receiver, she pushes a heavy exhale out hearing Holdo on the other line, her warm voice is gentle and inviting, “Hello?”

Rey shudders a little, “Hi Mom, it’s Rey.”

Poe looks at Rose who’s eyes connect with Finn, who is mirroring her, only to hear half of their delicate conversation.

“Much better. Yes. I’m home.” She sniffs, “Yes, I did...” they go on asking each other important questions regarding her family, and if they’re doing any better, and Rey’s trip home, if she saw her friends yet, if she saw Ben. Rey sobs, “I did, I know, I love him too. I always have.” 

Her friends gape at each other and wonder if Ben knows that juicy little admission. 

“Um. Mom?” Rey sniffs, “I was wondering if maybe you could help me, just one more time?” She waits, nodding her head though Holdo can’t see, “It’s...it would be a fundraiser, for Kaydel.” She pauses, “during The Rise of the Golden Moon Festival....Mile 5... I know it’s just two months. I know. I just—she’s already had surgery,” she explains the situation. “Yes Mom. Ok. Ok thanks. Love you too. Bye.”

Not another second goes by and she’s blindly keying out another number, turning slightly to grab for her pen, “Hi, this is Pro Surfer Rey Kenobi. I’m looking to speak with Dr. Rian Johnson.”

“I don’t want to go up.” Whines Poe looking shell shocked, wanting to hear Rey build this meeting before his eyes. He’s dying to see Kaydel’s face when Rey unveils her plan, reveling in the way that she told them it was the right thing to do. 

“If we have to, you do too.” Says Rose. 

Ben comes in for a water and sees Rey working the phone. Her notes over taking Luke’s desk, hearing her thank Dr. Johnson, confirming the date with their next call sometime today. Rey hangs up changing her stance to get off the chair, making sure he got some attention that he obviously craved. Sitting upon his lap in the couch she found him in just yesterday, she asks him about the last hour. 

“I missed you,” he says, nipping at the shell of her ear. She hums in appreciation, leaning into to tell him the same. He bites back the nerve to ask her about access to that red book in Rose’s locker, instead pulls her in close, “I’m dying for lunch...” he teases.

“Oh really? I’m pretty sure I’m quite full from breakfast...” her grin as wicked as his.

“Not in here,” Luke scolds, pressing his face in the sliding window. Rey’s eyes bulge out of her face. Both of them put their hands up assuring him it’s not. Luke nods laughing a bit before leaning against the front of the Guard house again. 

“Shh,” Ben’s mind is already working out where he can have her. Slowly pushing his hand down into her bottoms, inserting a fingertip and starts strumming her slick core. Ben’s never been like this, so needy of any woman but Rey wasn’t just anyone, she was his. Meant for him. His soulmate. And if they were going to be in trouble, they’d handle it together. 

“I can’t be quiet,” mewling out a whisper.

“Yes you can.” He works into her faster, palming her clit with his palm. Rey tried and failed to stay semi silenced when she felt herself quickening. Alarmed, Ben covers her mouth with the hand holding her waist. Her mouth goes wide when she comes, licking the inside of his palm, “fuck” he whines, a hot mess spend explodes from him, “fuck..” he spouts again. 

“Surf?” Rey offers, her smile widening greatly. 

“Surf.” He repeats in finality, “surf...”

——-  
Mile 5  
12:00pm  
——-

“Mile 5? Right now?” Ben sounds like he could pass out. 

Rey giggles at him. “You can stay here,” splashing at his crotch. 

“How are you not tired?” Trying to hide his slight satisfaction. It’s not exactly that it’s exhausting to have a release but it is relaxing, and Ben finds it hard to want her to know this, after his embarrassing display. He tries not to get in his head about it, shoving her board off with his leg. 

“Stamina.” She grins. 

“Stamina...” he scoffs. 

“One of these days you should try my routine.” She sticks her tongue out. “Might do you some good,” lowering back down to her board to paddle, noticing the whistles from the shore. “Don’t make too much of a scene Solo. We’re on ‘stage’...” nudging her nod to the side with a smirk. 

It’s enough of a motion to make him look, and turn back to her gleaming smile. “You like this don’t you?”

“At a distance. Being chased? No... but giving hope that another generation could be better...yes...that’s the best part of the crowd.” She looks at him, “but the best part of this,” she waves her finger between them, “is being here with you.”

He stays seated watching her paddle out, diving into the massive wave, then he remembers the time. “Shit. The tide! REY!” But it’s too late she’s already down and under, kicking through the it and paddling past. Ben lowers thinking about Kaydel’s freak accident. Not exactly being a God bearing man, he begs that nothing happens to her before he can reach her. This is her life... her entire life has been in the waves, a love for the ocean, surfing all day, it’s threaded through her bloodstream, he’s sure of it, hardwired to her permanently. To take it would surely kill her. Ben powers through the lapping calm waves of the lagoon all the way out to the breaking waves over the reef shouting for her in a panic. Such screams he though could be heard even on the shoreline or far enough out to sea or air hollering for anyone that could reach her first to make her stay. “REY!!” He’d scream between diving and surfacing. Calling over and over until he finally spots her sitting comfortably on her board talking to Captain Bridger. 

With a sigh and awful hoarseness, he thanks Ezra, lifting Rey into the boat and then her board of course, followed by himself and his. 

His voice protests a whine, “you’re not hurt are you?” At Rey’s slow negative shake of her head, Ben tries several times to say, “good.”

“The beach heard you,” said Ezra, “I had crew out on STX15s to find her. Got you covered.” He watches curiously as the pair hug sweetly and stay joined, when he hears Rey purr, “thank you Alpha,” feeling that much better they intercepted her.


	6. Back Then

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben struggles with no voice from shouting through Rey’s rescue. 
> 
> Rey contacts her friends on the circuit still to set up the ground work for the fundraiser. Ben learns a few things he’d like to know more about. 
> 
> Rey catches up with Kaydel.
> 
> Ben remembers the first time he met Rey as kids...<3

Rendered useless to the beach for his strained vocal chords, Ben and Rey make their way back to the Guard Shack allowing Rey to carry out her plan. Ben, who could usually sleep at all times of the day, sits in Luke’s chair watching her. His calm returning to him with each passing moment. Watching her methodically, she notes who she’s called with the date and time, who she spoke to if it wasn’t her contact person of interest. She notes what she needs from them, then on a separate page she writes down her ‘go to’s’ underlining it twice before continuing. His eyes go wide when she writes her friend’s names: Jacen, Jaina, Tenel, Sabine, Zeb, Anja, she lists more than he can see at his reclined position. 

Pushing nervously on the clicking pen top, then at the time, counting out five hours from their current time of 1:30pm, “it’s 6:30pm then in Coruscant.” Rey leans in, pressing the phone down between the crook of her neck and chin, fingering through her address book to “The Twins” followed by a quick clatter of buttons and a breath on her lips as the phone beginning to ring. A smile already plays across her face calling them which has Ben wondering what’s going through her mind. 

“Hey Jay-Bee! It’s Reylo, ‘sup girl?” Rey pulls the phone from her ear in pain from Jaina’s squeal, “REYLO!!” squinting in pain. 

“What’s going on?!” Jaina’s volume seems to get louder. 

Rey grunts at it, “I’m home for starts—“

“No shit?! Did you find him? Shit! Does he know?”

“Oi! Right to the sheets yeah? No, ‘oh happy to hear your home?’” She laughs.

“Best not to mix words mate!”

“Yes - he hasn’t seen them yet so no.” She giggles in an exasperated way. 

‘Seen what?’ Ben thinks. 

“Hey listen. Jay, I need your help. Is Jacen with you?” She waits for her answer, “well tell him I’m putting together a Fundraiser for Kaydel.”

Silence. 

“Jay?...”

“K.K. Cee?! Are you serious?” Rey explains her plan. “Well shit, aren’t you something? Count us in. When - where is it?”

“August 30th - Mile 5, Jakku Beach. Listen she can’t know. So that means make sure it isn’t published.”

“Please, Reylo, I’ve got this. I’ll ask our sponsors too. Is this number good to reach you?” At Rey’s approval, they end their call. 

Rey taps out Tenel’s number before Ben can ask, “Hey T, it’s Lo...need a favor..”

Making her way through her list, she notes everyone that said yes with a check and circles next to that need to get back to her. “Perfect,” She says tucking her paper into her book when Kaydel walks in dressed professionally in a cream blouse, royal blue pencil skirt, hair left long, and softly over her right shoulder with her knee brace on. ‘I will fix this.’

Ben looks on knowing he saved Rey from the very thing she’s trying to correct for Kaydel. He shakes his mind from the ‘what if’s’ interested in all of her nicknames and what ‘Jay-Bee’ was talking about. 

Kaydel tried picking up her speed to get to Rey for a hug, awkwardly bobbing before Rey hopped from her perch on the desk, plowing right into her hero. “It’s so good to see you!” Rey squeaked. Emotional, similar to her other meetings, they stay and talked, excited for each other. “So I hear you want to help with a surfing event?” 

‘What the hell?’ Rey freezes.

“I mean we only really have one- did you want to do other ones?”

‘Oh, maybe she doesn’t really-‘ “well, I was wondering what goes into that one and maybe we can do little ones throughout the summer if it’s not too much with the locals, or maybe guards one day.” Amused with the sudden squeak of Luke’s chair, she smiles lightly at Ben. 

Kaydel explains the inner workings of throwing these types of events. “Usually the food is decided on like a month before. The hardest is planning around visitors for rooms at the hotels.” Rey makes a mental note. 

They carry on for long enough that Ben gets up to lay on the couch “Rose said she brought snacks if you’re hungry,” Offers Rey, pointing to her locker. 

‘This could be my chance at that book.’ He thought. “Ok.” 

The phone rings startling Rey. Without another thought she explains she’s been waiting for a call. Shrugging, and walking over to the phone to pick it up, “hello?”

“Oh good you are still there.” Says Holdo.

“Hi Mom,” Rey sits on Luke’s Desk, Rey smiles at her voice. “Really?” She can’t hold back her amusement, Rey covers her mouth, chirping out a giggle. “That’s fantastic. Great. Listen, I’m going to head out for a bit—yes. No I don’t want a phone. I did but now I don’t. I’ll catch you here or call you back. Or you know, you could always join me in the waves,” Her grin widens, “in a floaty. Ok, ok. Bullocks no! Don’t even speak of it. Yep, love you too. Bye.”

Rey apologized to Kaydel again asking what her plans were for the rest of the day. The girls talk a little while longer and Ben, with the commotion of the guards coming through is able to swipe the journal, turning to his locker and stuffing it in his gym bag. It’s the sneakiest he’s been a long time - since they were kids really. 

Back then, it was to sneak out of the house and of course back in. Especially when his parents would have their fights. Never physical but literal ‘disrupting the peace’ types of arguments. His parents were just the worst when they fought and at times it felt like it was constant. Parenting styles and purchases usually made their house catch fire as though it was made out of brush. Their arguments would usually start when his mom noticed something. A question, most of the time. They were really all just that, but she had fight in her. She could bring the pain if she needed to. His father had really no idea how to be when he was around. He couldn’t figure out his ‘humor’ wasn’t funny, instead caused attitudes to flare at his outbursts. Mom always felt like she was being yelled at and then... then she had enough, putting her foot down, the house would swell with tension. As if he thought his wife would always back down. As if she didn’t do enough. As if she wasn’t worth enough.

The thing was, Ben’s Mom was his world, so the pain she fought back from, was pain he’d wear. His mother and father loved each other, that was for sure, but nothing else seemed to line up for the pair. They’d bark at each other and then somehow it would pull him into it, who begun being the scapegoat, holding their pain, as a child. He’d lash out and it just got worse from there. Ben would retreat to the beach to watch the sunsets. It seemed to be the only place he could go where the world wasn’t shouting at him. Their vibrant colors were as chaotic as his life had been but always eased off after the sun had set—-just like the fights.

He can picture her, the night they met. He was twelve, making her just six, out late without an adult in site. Curiously, he’d watch on as if he could accept the responsibility of looking after someone who had no one, just like him. Sitting down in the sand with his knees drawn to his chest, he’d fold his arms around his knees and just watched. The girl was something special. Tiny. Playing in the golden tide, her smile would make him smile, her concentration would make him think... like they were linked together in some bond. She’d play until well after the sun had set, retreating to a hole stuffed with sticks and what looked like a blanket of tied shirts. Horror swelled through his face realizing this girl or such raw talent could be homeless. A new glow on the beach starts to burn as she starts her fire and successfully kindles it to a steady bonfire. ‘She’s done this before, hasn’t she?’ He thinks. ‘How many times before?’ Suddenly his home life as stressful as it was, wasn’t as bad as hers, was he just being hurled around like an average moody teen? Tween? Or was it as bad as he let himself think? 

Ben, who sat still on the beach under the darkening night sky, slowly got up the nerve to approach this child. Whipping the sand from his shorts, trying to look as non-threatening as he could, pushed his, then, shorter hair back, revealing his childlike features too. His ears he thought, wouldn’t make him appear like a troublesome teen looking to give a little homeless girl a fright. The closer he got, the more nervous he became, watching this little one take care of herself. 

“H-hi” Ben stammers out when he finally reaches her camp. The glow decorating now both of their faces in such a familiarity that Rey didn’t turn from him.

“Hi,” her voice squeaks as innocently as a child would, “I’m Rey,” answering his inquisitive look. 

Ben introduces himself, telling her that he saw her surfing in the sunset. “You’re very talented.”

Thankful for the glow of the fire, the pair blush at each other, “thank you” she smiles, offering him a place next to her by the fire. “Have you eaten?” 

He looks at her like she’s crazy for asking him, a well dressed and taken care of young man. He nods at her, wide eyed, watching her prepare clams in a metal bucket he’s sure she used for building sand castles. She has at least ten with her, setting them in the bucket filled with sea water, and low within the fire. “I got them from the lagoon. Do you want to try it when it’s done?” 

Never having clams before, he nods. If this kid could eat it, so could he, knowing he had no allergies, he asks, “what do they taste like?”

“Chicken.” She grins, “like naked chicken nuggets.” His immaturity had him blushing at the sound of the word ‘naked.’ “You know - not the ones they sell at the store with that crust on them.”

He remembers as she shared her dinner with him, offering one after another. “What about you?” He asks. 

Rey thumbs over with a smile to the lagoon. “Shop’s over there. I can always get more.” 

His vision of their past pulls from him at the sound of her voice calling his name. A touch of her hand to his arm startles him, now seeing Rey as if she came to him in a dream. “Hey... are you alright?” He blinks at her and nods, knowing his voice is still not strong enough to speak from the way he swallows roughly. “Ok, you had me worried... you weren’t responding.”

“What?” He strains out.

At her hushing he quiets down, “I’m going to order food from the deli up the road. Do you want anything?” She smiles at his nod, offering him a pen and paper to tell her what he’d like. The Guard shack bustles with more guards than it had all day, but it doesn’t deter her sweetness to him. As she sees it, he’s the only one in the room, brushing her fingertips over his cheek, pushing his hair from his face. “Can you go for a walk with me to pick it up?” 

Noises of protest come from the guards around her, complaining that they’d rather go than be stuck in the chair. But she barely hears them focused on his stare. It’s not one of lust, just genuine completeness. Thankfulness, she thinks, that she can’t place. If anyone, she should be emitting that feeling through her gaze. She knows it’s not. Giving into one that she had when she was younger, like her six year old self, genuinely looking into him for his security.

“Solo?” Luke called from the deck just before the stairs.

“What?” He strains another croak.

“You’re on first aid for the rest of the day,” he pulls Jess from the chair to cover his roving duties. The entire staff cheers like they got the day off. First aid was the worst! 

Roving was so much better. The quad for one was fun. Driving away from a patron pretending to be needed with the radio, even better, especially because most of them just wanted help putting up their umbrellas or tents, and that isn’t his job. Ben never stopped for that. Jess would sometimes, but that was on her, not him.

First aid though. Ugh! Aside from the medical gear and desk, it was a literal garage to store the gear at each chair. People would come for a bandaid or pretend they got stung by a dead jellyfish, but the very worst of it was the overreacting parents. He very specifically remembers one from when he started, the woman was flailing around over-exaggerating the fall and scrape her son obtained in the parking lot. A piece of gravel slid underneath is skin and she literally lost her mind telling them that she’d sue them all and shut this place down if he had received a tumor from radiation there. He could have sworn he said it under his breath but the glare she gave him after was obvious he didn’t. Her scene had four lifeguards and Luke taking a look at the ‘injury’ where the kid sat cool as a cucumber through the whole thing. He had even brushed his foot off to remove the sand and the tiny piece of gravel fell into it. No tears from the boy, just a lot of waisted time and not even one single hint of an apology hung from her lips. ‘Fucking first aid...’

Rey takes a minute thinking she should stay with him instead of play in the water today. “Can I have your keys? I’d like to get something from home.”

“They’re in my locker, in my shoe.” Struggling through the sentence, telling her the three number code, offering her a kiss before going to the dungeon of First Aid. As he leaves he remembers he never zipped the bag. ‘Fuck...’

Unlocking his locker, and retrieving his keys she sees the red book. Amused she takes it, putting it in her bag along planning to get the journals leading up to it. ‘This’ll make for an interesting conversation,’ she thinks, as a smile creeps across her face. 

———-  
First Aid “Center”  
4:00pm  
———-

‘Rey’s safe.’ Ben hushes his mind. ‘She’s safe.” 

His mind plummets back into the past. Remembering she’d gone to fetch more in the dark, the ocean only lit by the moon, her and her pail, leaving him warmed by the fire. He watched on as she disappeared into the dark water, insecure about letting her go, but not wanting to snuff out her fire or let it burn her clothes. The struggle was real, and he’d only just met her. He stared at her setup coming up with a plan to let her sleep in his room with a real blanket and a pillow softer than the lump of sand she’d created for herself. He can’t help but want to make this right for her. Nothing about this evening was right for him but surely not this. The gold hues of the fire clicker over her board. It’s not like anything he’s seen. It looked like she’d made it herself. As he studies it, he notices notches all along the rail. He frowns trying to figure out why anyone would carve ridges into it. 

Rey is already back with another lot for them answering the noticeable questions looming over his brow. “It’s time” she says calmly, as if she accepted this life with finality. “All of the days I’ve been on my own.” Her board, like her is small. It’s heavily decorated on one side in terms of the inch long veins she’s pulled in the wood. 

His eyes go wide not hearing a single word more, “you’re alone? Rey. You’re too young to be alone.” His mind swells, “what do you do when it rains?”

“I sleep under the boardwalk if it rains. There’s a shell of cement in there where it meets the road...”

“No.” He cuts her off. 

“Yes...”

“Are.. did you run away or something?”

Rey’s head dips. “I was left,” she answers quietly. 

Ben’s face contorts making the worst faces trying to control his anger. He stands abruptly, fluffing his hair from the force of it all. He shoves his hand out in front of him to take her away from this. She just stares at him, not sure of what has just over taken her new friend. “Come with me. Let me —“

“This is my home...” she protests grabbing his side sweeping foot, turning it swiftly from smothering out her source of warmth, flinging him down to the beach roughly. “It might look like nothing to you, but it’s not nothing. It’s all I have.”

Landing in a heap, inhaling sand, looking back at her kneeling back on her feet, her expression hurtful that she shared this time with him, to have him try to destroy her camp.

“Yes but, you don’t deserve this. My home might be shit, but I still have enough to share...” he watches her just stare, not truly understand what he wants. “If an adult comes, they’re going to take you. Is that what you want?” Watching her process and shake her hear from side to side. “Good. Why don’t you come with me? We have room downstairs. We can camp out down there if you want. No fire though. Air conditioning. I think you might like it.”

Cautiously, she agrees, taking her clothes, balling them together she stuffs them in a shopping bag, holding her finger pulling the bucket back towards the ocean flinging her food back in to their home. Silently she thrusts her arm through the handles of both her pail and her bag of clothes, and then lifts her board to walk with him. He notices she has no shoes either, blinking slowly, he tries to hide the need to kill whoever did this to her. 

Ben is startled back to the present at the request of an ice pack. He doesn’t make a sound while getting it for the young man, seeing him off and then comes Rey, smiling brightly at him with items in tow. 

“So listen, all they had for drinks were cream soda which I know is not your thing,” she sticks out her tongue, “or iced tea. So I picked up that. If you want water it’s upstairs, right?” She smiles brightly at him, gaining a lovely smile back from him. Rey can’t help but stare, something’s on his mind, she knows, but his kind gaze makes her feel so special she could explode. “Listen, thank you.” She pauses. “I know it’s your job and all.” Lowering her eyes out of his range, “you’ve always looked out for me, and I just—just thank you.” She shudders a breath knowing it could have been her last ride. Rey leans in for a hug for a moment, releasing him when she remembers the dessert she found. “Oh! I have something for after lunch,” scooting over to her bag, pulling a yellow box out. 

“Mallowmars?” He grins, searching her face.

“When, um... you insisted I slept over, you gave me ‘one for each hand’ from your dad’s desk.” Her eyes mist at the memory. “I’ve never had anyone in my life that was quite like you,” she sniffs, “and now after that whole fiasco— I’m sure you’re in pain... and I’m sorry.. and figured maybe this would help.”

Ben pulls Rey back to his side, trying to voice his thanks, getting squeaks instead. Famished, they both eat in silence. Ben almost literally choked twice, gaining squeal from Rey who informed him both times to chew his food. The first time telling him he wasn’t a snake, and the second explaining she didn’t know how to save him if he was actually choking. “Small bites!” She snorts, “please!”

Shaking his head with the last piece of his hero, he rapidly opens and closes his hands for the box of Mallowmars like a child, making her heart swell with satisfaction she even grabbed the box to begin with. Setting down her iced tea bottle, she leans down off of the desk to grab her bag. Retrieving the box, she opens it as he did all that time ago, putting one in each hand, emotion thick in the air, he looks down at her gesture. “Rey,” his voice rumbles shaking his head again, “I’m glad you remember.”

A shy smile presses into her lips. “I’ll never forget, Ben.” A pause and then, “it’s why I kept writing. I wanted you to know I never moved on from you. You’re my family. I’d do anything to keep you.”

He closes his eyes, “me too,” he tired again.

“I know,” she nods, “I know.”

As the moment passes and they share the treats, Rey pulls out the rest of the 2012 journal. “I figure, you might want to know more about the people I just called. Jaina helped me with 2015 printing pictures to add” she sees Ben’s excitement blossom shooting his eyebrows straight up. “Nothing that was published.” Ben became even more interested, “The Jay’s’ were good about that,” she nods, ‘Jaina reminds me of Rose. I can’t really place Jacen though—kind of like he’s an extension of Jaina. It must be a sibling thing. Anyways, she’s the nickname queen. Everyone had one. And since I was new, she gave me one too. At first I was sunshine, I couldn’t honestly tell you why. But then it all changed. She saw my pictures and I broke down talking about talking about everyone but then we got to you and I couldn’t speak anymore. She wanted your name and importance. And renamed me ‘Reylo’ so you could be with me while my books weren’t. They’re good people, truly.” Feeling him snake his arm around her waist to hold her close made her shiver. She was sure that would always happen in his presence...”let me um, catch you up.”


	7. Journals 2012-2014

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey reads her journals to Ben all the way up to the incident in 2014.

“November 1, 2012. 

We’ve made it to Coruscant. I’m not sure if you’ve been, but Ben... they don’t take care of anything here. I mean the city doesn’t. There are no guards. No beach. Beach, like sand ... they have what they think is a boardwalk, and a wall into the water. And if that’s not discouraging enough, there’s garbage literally everywhere. I was literally told to dive from the jetty or get towed out... I may be little but I’m no weakling. I walked right out with the rest, announced, and paddled right through the turbulence. 

The water was so cold, but you know how I am. I hate that clingy, lose wet fabric feel, so I just handled it. The waves were strangely soft. Like there was too much of an under current to keep anything together. What a mess! Keeping up though, that was the key. If I could keep up here I could go anywhere.

Thank goodness for Kaydel’s comment about surfing shallow...because that is what this is. Ugh it’s just — I expected so much more. Like way more than a tragic mess of trash compactor exploding all over the beach.

By the end of the runs today my body was screaming. Unless I figure out how to write with my mouth, I may have to skip writing tomorrow. My arms feel like they’re going to fall off at any moment...

 

November 2, 2012

Yeah? no. Sluggin it today. 

 

November 3, 2012

What a lovely thing Advil is. Soon as I figured out how to swallow it by the way. That was no easy task. 

“Don’t crew it! So help me! You can’t have it then!”

Poor Mom, I think I shaved another year off of her life trying to swallow shit whole, promising a pill would work too. 

The surf today was a mess. Several had to get towed out, like out of the contest completely. Did ok today I think. My sponsors are mad I won’t wear a shirt though. I’m going to promise you— and everyone else, if I ever wear a shirt it’s because I forgot my suit all together, and even so, that shits getting rolled up or torn off.”

 

November entires continues through half of the month describing the beatings of Coruscant’s shores, explaining the successes and fails.

 

November 11, 2012

Andrew, bloody hole of ass needs to leave me alone. He’s always got to pick. I mean I itched my chest, it’s my body, he comes over and tells me not to like I was caught undressing in front of the world. It was a damned itch! The guys shove their hands in there shorts at least thirty times an hour to yank and they’re nards - by the way, why do you guys do that? Why is it acceptable? 

Anyways that guy can go stuff himself in a hole in the wall and fuck off. Why was he even watching me? It’s not like we’re in the same heats. I know we’re being watched or I’d push that fucker in and walk away. Argh!

Snoke.

 

November 13, 2012

I can’t keep my eyes open. Just wondering how your life is treating you. Found a pillow in the new motel—gonna buy it. Leave them money at the desk for the pillow. It feels like a hug from you. I didn’t tell Mom. Should be an interesting conversation. Anything you know? Anything to feel normal. I hope you know you’re missed.

 

November 14, 2012

Traveling again. Next on the list is Tython. I’ve only heard stories on the place since we’ve been on the road. I can’t sleep. I’m too excited. Even in this fish bus. It’s easier to sleep in here and deal with the ride, but awake, ugh. I can’t wait till we get paid so I can get Mom a different car- anything. Anyway... Tython is something else all together. I’ve never seen white sand. I wonder if it’s truly white. They say the water is so clear you can see the sea floor twenty feet down, if not more. Issue is they don’t have what we do on Jakku. So I have to be aware of sharks. That’s unnerving. 

The contest is called “Chasing Giants” I wonder what that even means. Like how big are the waves? Mile 5 felt like 20 footers But I know that’s from being so small. They couldn’t really be that big. But what if these are? ‘Giants.’ We have another seven hours before we get there. I wonder what the barrel would look like. If it’s that clear. Would it be like glass? 

This next heat has me categorized within the short boarders, which means I might actually meet the twins. Kind of excited about that. :)

Anyway...I miss you. I hope you’re well. 

 

November 15, 2012

Direct deposit is interesting. Like you get a stub but it says void on it but it’s in your bank the same day. Was banking always like this? I have a feeling it wasn’t. I always stuffed money into this shell I found. It was smart I thought, until the sea took it, reminding me to be careful. Always.

Since I’m not technically old enough to get money out we had a discussion about the fish bus. I should not have to explain myself on why I hate this thing. It’s been three months now. I can’t get the smell off of me. For some reason Mom doesn’t act like it effects her, but it does! Break down and rent a new one. 

To my surprise... she said ok! I asked if we could go today. She said after the preliminary round. That was a mistake. I still smell like guts. I basically shut down the event. I’ve never been more mortified in my life. Mom went to get a new one and I holed myself in the motel bathroom. Literally scrubbing with ever soap I could find. Figuring she was back, I propped my door open knocking on her door a cross the hall. Well, let me tell you— I could not have embarrassed myself more! Jaina opened the door looking at me like I was crazy. I hadn’t noticed her though. I was looking back at my door hoping the flipflop I had propping it open wouldn’t fall and lock me out. I seriously begged her, who I thought was Mom, to smell me and tell me if I still smelled like chum. By the time I looked at her door, both her and her brother were looking at me like I needed to be admitted. But she was nice after a fit of laughter of course. She hurried back in and out leaving her brother in my face, and came out with her products. She goes, “use the whole thing. This first. Then this. And then when you dry your hair, this. You’ll smell like sunshine feels.”

Her brother mocked her and their door closed. So I thanked the door and tried again. Less fish after each wash, is this how a girl is supposed to smell?”

 

Ben starts laughing all too much at the reduction of the fish smell, his mouth wide open, Rey takes a moment to stuff another cookie into his mouth, shushing him. “My skin was screaming after all the washing. I never wanted to see soap again!” His laugh retreated only a little.

“Ok” she settles in for more reading.

“November 17, 2012

They set off the contest a couple days to make sure the sharks were gone or at a lesser quantity. I hadn’t seen Jaina or Jacen until check in and I honestly didn’t see her—instead heard her screaming a hello of “SUNSHINE” across the tent. I knew that was for me. I didn’t know if I should be uncomfortable or what until she came in for a hug asking if I felt better. We talked a bit and I remembered to thank her of course. She pretty intense. Hollering out nicknames to a bunch of people that I haven’t met yet, and then she’s scooting me around introducing me to everyone as Sunshine. I swear I must have been so red by the time it was time time to surf! 

Tython’s waves are solid giants. At the beach they looked big, like ten footers so obviously bigger when we got out there. It was —I can’t even. I could see my heat mates under the wave, diving with me like they were behind glass. It was exciting. Even perched waiting was fun, Tamal, “T” they call her, she sings all types of genres and gets everyone going with her moves. It really just makes being away from home a little easier. I actually smiled. 

The runs were a dream. I wonder what it looks like at dawn. Or at dusk. Either way, if-when I see you again, I’ll take you here. You should really see it for yourself.”

As the hour goes on she’s read for the rest of the year. Everything from the newer bus being an RV of sorts. Nothing fancy as she says, no toilet but it does have a bed, and a kitchen with a nook of sorts, jokingly reminding her of a walk in closet she’d seen in a magazine recently. She goes on to explain classes, if she could really call it that. Homeschooling had its ups and downs, clearly she missed people she knew, and the anxiety from it could be quite real, but she used the time to get to know people who she contested with, or do schoolwork, mostly schoolwork. Cuddling with her pillow... pretending it had Ben’s consciousness... remembering all of those times he clearly looked out for her. Which sparked her interest in trying out those food choices he’d have or offer. Having the opportunity to try it in a deli that Mom had her stop in at on the read to Jedha, what a terrible mistake. 

An excerpt from December 29, 2012

I don’t know why you like this. I’ve had it now cubed and sliced and it’s a miracle that I haven’t yaked on myself at least for the duration of today. Crackers didn’t make it any better either. The sliced stuff makes me feel like I’m eating some film on the top of pudding— but not sweet like pudding, more like If milk did that. Like if milk could grow a film and taste like nuts. You know like the ones your mom likes to candy sometimes? Jacen said it’s more like balls, but I don’t get the correlation. SAT word by the way. I’ll be trying out more as the weeks come up to it. I think its in March?

This gains another laugh from Ben who asks roughly, “do you now?”

Blushing horribly before she scoots the idea of teasing this man she has had such an incredible past with, knowing full well he’d hate it if she did, says simply, “haven’t had the chance to find out.” 

Ben chokes on air. 

With that she shuts the journal, taking out a new one, checking on the time, 2013 has her stretched thin. There’s just so much that had gone in in the beginning of the year between being moved up a grade level, moving all of her tests forward which was exhausting to study for. If they were on the road she would sleep if she wasn’t working on her writing skills in her journal, or staring at their pictures, or talking to Mom about he signing hours, or meet and greets. She had honestly begged the stars to see him show up at one. The further she got from Jakku the more she’d beg but knew it was a long shot - surely he didn’t know where she was or even how to find out. 

When Holdo figured out she was just going though every book she had, and doing all of the questions out of boredom, she contacted school to see if Rey could be moved ahead. Sure enough, she was granted it. Making note that she could apply for the next test in six months time if the work load was still too light. 

By her birthday, she’s made a name for herself, between being interviewed and in magazines like ‘Peak,’ and school work going easy, she started doing yoga at sunrise with Mom, and out to surf with the twins as stress relief. Now being fifteen would start more problems, or so she thought. The twins were older than her by two years and had already presented. Jaina mentioned all too clearly she was an Alpha and Jacen, an omega, which she made absolutely fucking sure that, that ancient behavior has evolved, that incest was not happening. They had their own partners, and there’s some DNA pattern that your ‘spirit’ is after anyways. In her own words, “like as in, we can’t smell each other. In other words he could be a Beta—even though they don’t exist.”

Which then, of course, brought Jaina to boldly ask if Rey had:

“May 14, 2013

Jaina... can be very forward. I mean I just started my ‘thing’ -I don’t exactly want to tell you about how I bleed and all. Respect you know.

Well she just asked me about presenting. I JUST turned fifteen. I mean. It’s not like a gong goes off and says ‘hello world I’d like to tell you what Rey would like to fuck as.’ 

Of course I said I hadn’t yet. They didn’t believe me so they both freaking tried to smell me. Nothing. Just sea salt and sunshine. Which by the way, I still go by. 

At first I was actually pissed but now that I’m thinking about it... maybe it’s a good thing they confirmed it. Andrew basically hangs around until I pull out my journal or go hang out with them. I have the nerve to break his legs but god I don’t want to be caught doing it.”

Ben laughs at this too, “I could see you doing it too.”

“Yeah - Yeah...”

Rey goes on to explain that they had started hanging out with Tamal, Sabine, and Anja, which Mom had welcomed. The girls and Jacen were a solid group that would relieve some of the known stress she was harboring from being away from Ben. The contract signings with her sponsors had her the face of their brand for five years, which is unheard of. Holdo didn’t want boys around in case Rey did present unannounced. Jacen wasn’t a threat being an omega though so Holdo was he wasn’t a threat. Mom had seen some behaviors start up from her birthday through the end of the month which made her suppose Rey would also be an omega—but if anything Jacen would be the one needing protection.

“June 9, 2013

The twins have a mixed style when it came to tricks, which I would imitate during practice. Jacen has been so impressed he asked me to join them in their games. “T and Anj won’t do it. They aren’t as crazy as you,” is specifically what he said. Mom said no, and I should have listened but didn’t. 

No, no injuries... but I was hurled into the spotlight which I wasn’t ready for. I just wanted to play in the waves. People follow me Ben, I don’t like it. I can’t open my curtains without seeing cameras. I can’t leave now to go from my room to the gym or walk to the beach or oh not even get to Mom’s bus without someone following me. 

Well it turns out that I’m holed up where ever I am now. Mom’s mad but she’ll forgive me. Right?”

At Ben’s pause he gets up to help a patron with a bee sting, appreciating the time watching him try to calm the child and explain what the ‘jelly’ in the stick would do. Loving seeing how he let the little girl put apply it to her sting. How strikingly similar his care was to the girl as it was to her personally... it made her smile knowing he was like that for everyone.

Now rounding 5:00pm, Ben calls up to Luke to check on chores, confirming his role to sweep out the sand from the first aid center and all of the walkways surrounding the center. Watching him clench his jaw to round out an “Okay” still makes her upset that he’s had little of his voice return. Eyeing the broom, she slinks off the desk to grab it. Amused, he captures the neck of it, “not yet. At 7:00pm,” nodding back to the desk. Using her word from before, “more,” making Rey’s heart lurch up into her throat. 

‘He wants to know.’ She smiles. 

“Alright,” She replies slowly, Ben offering her to sit in the desk chair, so she did, accepting the soft cushioning of the swivel chair. Ben sat on the desk, hanging his arms off of the high back over her shoulders, clasping his hands just over her chest, respectfully, of course. He would rest his head on the back, hunching his back to get comfortable, like a child waiting for a bedtime story. Leaning his head a little further down to hers he presses a kiss into her hair, trying to get her to continue, “more?”

Rey continues explaining locations and how stirred up crowds would get, constantly asking the twins to smell her wrists when she felt like panicking. Each time they’d tell her she was fine, even though her anxiety was skyrocketing. Writing about actually being in the ocean made her at ease. The ocean was her second home. It was everything to her. It was her calm, her passion, but more than anything, it was where she could comfortably remember her friends, and Ben.

“July 7, 2013

I can see you when I’m in the ocean. I can hear your voice, telling me to relax. I almost feel like I can talk to you. It’s like you’re here. Guiding me through it. I mean—I’m doing all the playing but you’re here helping me not lose my mind? I don’t know. I’m sure I sound crazy. I’m sure this whole thing is crazy. But... but I don’t know. Part of me just wants to run. Just come home. Jakku isn’t even part of the circuit. I can’t even fathom why. Does Mr. Skywalker have it on some kind of ban? 

Next place we’re going is Degobah. I hear the food is amazing. T says there’s some amazing soul food there. Says the gumbo is rich and worth every penny. Anj added that we need to get the frog legs...I’m not doing that. Like ever. I may be fine with gathering my own food but I’m not into eating frogs. I don’t care if they taste like the finest chocolate in the world, I’m not doing it. 

I surf with them now. T and Anj, they’re more showy in terms of walking on their long boards. They do tricks. The Jay’s said they’d be learning it but not for this round. Besides Degobah is know for their oysters. So I’m assuming it’s really rocky and probably closer to Coruscant’s setup. Either way, Advil before. I really don’t know if I can take another three days of that. Mom said visiting the gym would help. I didn’t think motels had them, but then she clarified. A lot of the surfers go to a specific chain apparently, Planet something. I’ll have to ask again.”

Anyway, I should really be doing some homework. I’ll write again with drool I’m sure. Mom found me drooling on this, hanging off the bed. She must think I’m insane. I didnt start the night like that.”

Rey continues on through the rest of the journal commenting on the food, promising him she’d take him or tell him to use her name to get her treatment. Going on with more on competitions and articles, nothing all that alarming. He’d honestly been waiting patiently for pictures and more on that motherfucker Snoke. He wanted to know about the attack and how she got better, who was there for her since he couldn’t be. He needed all of it but would have to wait until April of the next book. 

Rey’s hands shake as she turns the page: 

“April 21, 2014” is in a different scripted hand writing. “Mom wrote this, because I physically couldn’t Ben.” She looks up at the clock, showing 6:15pm. “I can read this and we can finish after at home, ok?” At his nod, Rey began:

“Mom (sniff), I know you’re recording me, but um..I, um, talk - write to the journal like I’m writing to Ben. So, um. If I could just... you know.. pretend you’re him?” 

A tear starts to form at the corner of her eye, emotion she hasn’t spoke of since the event straining her beautiful voice down to awful whines and whispers...Ben immediately releases her to spin the chair towards him, hoisting her up from the chair onto his lap like a child who had a nightmare. “We can wait till we get home,” he offers. 

“No—I need to just push on. You need to be in a place where you can keep your feet on the ground,” she says firmly. Taking another steadying breath, she gets into it: 

“They don’t believe me, Ben. The police. I heard them talking outside my hospital room, chalking it up to being a classic case of an omega in heat attracting anything ‘it’ could find. ‘It,’ Ben, they called me an ‘it’ right after they left the fucking room! Clearly they don’t have any problems, as servicemen of the LAW, to turn their backs on both an attempted rape and battery of an omega, and me who hasn’t even presented yet! I’m late. I know I’m late. It doesn’t make me an ‘it!’

Mom said to start from the beginning, as it’s really the only place to start. (Sniff. -hugging her pillow) The tournament had been postponed due to the massive tropical depression coming in off the coast of Ach-To. No one needed to die today, so, um...the crew and I went to see that movie that came out ‘Edge of Tomorrow,’ and then grabbed a bite at that burger place across the way. Well of course I’m all nervous energy after a movie like that. I can’t even sleep in the dark after that clown- doll movie came out. So I went to the gym ‘Shaka-Fit’, and stayed well into the night. They’d started powering down lights in class areas, and the trampoline section for the gymnasts or showy surfers, but I stayed doing lunges with the rogue bar - that thing on it own is like 75lbs. Naturally, I’d become tired enough to stop and gather my things, fixing to towel off and clean the bar, when I swear I thought I could hear fighting? Distant voices, but yelling, screaming, from a familiar voice. I was terrified, jolted I guess from the movie, figuring that was just it until I saw them. I saw the tall figure first, so I hid behind a step machine. Ben, I hid. I never do that. But I was scared. A girl ran from the shadows, maybe a little older than Jaina, woman I guess then. I saw her face for the briefest of seconds, I knew her... we had our last tournament together. 

I remember her kicking him off of her, shoving her foot in his rotten, upturned face. Actually, silently, cheering about it. He made some beastly sounds promising to rut into her full filling her needs and some other bullshit things you shouldn’t say to a lady. The girl didn’t look like she was fairing well so I snuck back to the rogue bar, picking it up stiffly since I’d been sore, and taking swing after swing at this monster. Well, he’d grunted and fallen releasing her to run and when she did I dropped the bar looking for my clothes. The guy picked me up and threw me, claiming her have to take out his needs on a child.”

Ben’s breathing has picked up trying desperately to remind himself he’s not in the fight. That he’s with her now protecting her, but is no closer to controlling himself than he’s hoping. Rey pushes kisses into his chest, over his heart, going back to the book. 

“He’d hit me in the face, held my throat with a single hand, crushing me into the gym floor, and looked over me, saying an Alpha could take whatever they wanted and a stupid omega‘s job was to satisfy them. They were nothing more than a meal. (Rey shoves her pillow over her face, hyperventilating in it.) I started choking on lack of air, and passed out. 

When I woke up, I was still in the gym. Shuddering breaths my leggings weren’t wet or torn, my lowers were intact but my shirt had been ripped from me. Sports bra— destroyed. And then I felt it, some cold liquid at my side, figuring the bastard came on me only to find he bit my side ripping something clear out of my body. The blood flowed evenly and I honestly thought that was it. That I’d die alone in that shitty gym, never getting to see you again. 

Mom said she found me, since I didn’t get home as the street lamps came on. She said the twins and everyone came out to support her search for me. And Jacen drove us to the hospital telling her waiting for an ambulance here would surely kill me.

I’ve been given a blood transfusions and clotted. They pumped me with blood thinners to counteract the finding and now I’m waiting to get an IUD because apparently this body is one big fucktard. I can’t function like a normal human, I can’t present, I can’t fight off an Alpha, so that makes me a dysfunctional omega. That’s just super. Can’t wait to find out what my first hard heat will be like, I’m sure it’ll be just as great as everything else so far. And now this fucking shit with the officers. Are we serious?!”

With that Luke clears his throat at the entrance of the First Aid Center with horror written all over his face. “I’m. I’m” He blinks an exaggerated number of times. “I just came down to, um, see if Ben wanted to break down chairs. But um, I’ll just handle it. Why don’t you go home.” Not sure if he can make another sound.


	8. Journal 2015

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey’s new nickname has been created by Jaina, experiencing her road to recovery with the help of Dr. Tano, and Dr. Johnson. 
> 
> Ben enjoys more pictures leading up to the beginning entry of her presenting.

Ben doesn’t move from the desk. Lightheaded from what he’d just heard, he’s sure there was a reason for wanting his feet on the ground. Low enough in elevation that he couldn’t hurt himself unless he fainted from the stress alone on his omega. Even now he knows he needs to be alert, he asks Luke to bring his things down, in a wavering tone. His lightheadedness is taking over every muscle in his body, returning him to the wreck that he’d become when she was attacked in the bathroom.

Though he can feel Rey with him, he trembles as if she’s not there. He’s living in her fear. It’s only been a full two days and the weight of everything that’s transpired throughout her life is now a burden for him to hold. He wanted this though. He wanted to know. Needed to. Needed to know how to fix it. Needed to know why his embrace over her scarring was so important, what it was doing to her. A small part of him, his conscious maybe, thinks there’s more to this. The end of the entry can’t be it, that he’ll get an evening thought. That he’ll figure out who did this to her and make sure he’s disposed of. 

Her hand shakes through the page, knowing there’s a picture of everyone by her bedside with her holding her pillow tightly to her body. She turns it so he can see she wasn’t alone. “You were there.” 

He dips his head to disagree. “No Rey.”

“I didn’t die. You had to be... I could see you when I fell asleep.”

“Memories Rey.”

“No. You told me to get up, your fear pushed me to open my eyes. Where were you in your life then?”

Ben takes a while to process this. What a silly question for her to be asking, “Rey I wasn’t with you, I was here, doing my third year.”

“Do you remember anything about that time? Different from your usual calm?”

He doesn’t want to hear her. Since she’d been gone he was looking for any reason to leave too. He wanted out of this hell hole. His parents had their problems, he was still living at home while the apartments were still being made—which couldn’t come fast enough. He rarely socialized at work, until Poe started coming around. That guy could talk the ears off of a potato. It was hard enough to loose the very person that looked out for him unconditionally the same way he did for her. 

His third year though, he had decided to start surfing again, with the board she made him for his nineteenth birthday. She said she could show him someday how she made it if it wasn’t long enough for him. The board was carved from balsawood which had to be transported from Ach-To. He could not possibly understand how she got it or the money to transport it. He also wondered when she spent the time cleaning it and making his board since most of the time she spent awake was following him around or in the waves with Rose, Poe and Finn.

Surfing though instead of being down gave him time to think. It gave him time to just be. It gave him time to reconnect to his past, and all of the things he used to secretly love. He started early and stayed late, the way she used to. Ben opened his mouth trying out the words as if he was telling a vision of her, “I started surfing again, in remembrance of you.” He sniffs. “I hadn’t been since you left. It hurt Rey. I couldn’t bring myself to do much of anything when you’d gone. We didn’t even really get to talk about it. What happened. And we always did. Talk that is. About everything.” He sniffs again. Her eyes go wide; he never got emotional unless it was after a rage fit back then. “So when I started surfing again, it gave me part of you back. Even if you never did come back, I’d have a part of you. I surfed all year, every day, to keep your memory alive.” He wipes his eyes with his thumb and index finger.

Seeing him get so upset was something to behold. Thumbing the center of the book with her right hand, scooping his cheek with her left, “Ben, I’m so sorry.” His eyes open to her, still wet, raw with sadness, heavily looking into hers. “I.. I just know it was you. Looking after me somehow. Like the stars aligned and the tides crashed at the same time. If I didn’t wake, I wouldn’t be here.” The weight of her comment hits him like a truck, prompting him to hold her tighter. 

Ben pauses a second, kissing into her hair, thanking her that she did come back, that she was strong enough to try, when he looks down and sees the picture. “Is that?”

“Yes, that was the day I got the news. The crew came down and hung out with me after the tournament.” Rey pointed out everyone, and Ben’s Alpha, even though he knew Jacen was an Omega, was pleased to see that he was respectfully not leaning closely in during the picture. This to him spoke volumes about him. The girls the crowded in showing little more than their heads, from left to right around the head of the bed were Anj, T, Sha-BB (Sabine) and ‘Jay-Bee’, all around Rey who held tightly to her pillow, leaning her cheek into it with a small, ‘I miss you’ kind of smile. 

The haven’t moved from the desk not even an inch, when he asks for her to continue. He needs to know her recovery before even trying to stand. “More, please.” In the distance she can hear quiet voices and knows somehow there will be an audience, but Ben asked for more and had no desire to move. So, she started up again: 

“April 22, 2014 

The crew came in after their runs. Didn’t bother to shower or change so that was a sight. Ben, you should have heard them. Jaina basically screeched everything she said until she got to my room. Jacen renamed her from ‘Jay’ to ‘Jay-Bee’ and when I asked why, he said in his booming voice, ‘because Jay-Be-Bitchin’ this whole time!’ Even Mom laughed. Because it was true. Jaina would fight the good fight and make sure people she cared about, which I can honestly say was practically everyone, were ok. She got the word out. Wanted everyone to know what happened so they could get the fucker. 

They stayed through the doctors coming in and explaining shit at first I didn’t really think I wanted them to know like when the Omega doctor came in to talk to me. But I mean— Jaina said they weren’t leaving. They were my adopted sisters, even teasing Jacen he was now a girl, stuffing tissue in his shirt, explaining he had breasts to the doctor, now she could speak. When Jacen verified he was an omega too that’s when Dr. Tano began to explain the goings on of an omega’s body. 

She was tall with dark olive skin, bright blue eyes, holding a medium frame, proud and true. She had a head wrap designed in white and blue, thick zebra print, wrapped and tucked tightly in her hair which complemented her light blue blouse and black slacks under her white lab coat. You could tell she held herself with high standards when she spoke, but was humble enough to be soft about the situation. She began by saying that blood-work confirmed I was an omega, and it wasn’t entirely unheard of for omegas under high levels of stress not to present at fifteen. ‘Your chart says you’ll be sixteen in May, and while you aren’t presenting yet, you have grown your glands.’ She pulls a chart from her books, asking the girls to come away from the beside so she could explain it better to me, and when she did I started seeing stars. There are apparently three tiny glands that rest along the side of my rib cage, on all female omegas that help produce back up hormones when I do have kids. It’s supposed to regulate lactation and control the effects of postpartum depression after the birthing process. I don’t want to think about it. Honestly. But I only have half now. 

I knew about the pain in my usual glands. They were awfully painful, pricking at the sides, getting smaller since last year. She told me it would continue if I didn’t change my stress level. Saying I needed to figure out what it was and fix it so I could go through my first hard heat. Prolonging it would make it more likely that I’d become infertile. That was had to hear. 

I told Mom after I graduated I’d be taking time off from school so I could get my shit together. She was supportive. The crew would accompany me everywhere. My physical training was scheduled to take a solid three months if I followed the schedule exactly. My support group told me they’d be with me at night until it was time to travel. Then they’d be with their caravans but it was all figured out before Dr. Tano left. 

The next doctor to visit was Dr. Johnson, and by reputation alone, had even Mom swoon. He was the best doctor in the field, making sure success rates had nothing to do with prescriptions. He expected me to train with a personal trainer of his choosing knowing full well she was a hard-ass. ‘Gwen Phasma will be in constant contact with me on your rehabilitation. You will put in all of the hours and I will see you on Wednesday’s and Saturdays. I travel with the circuit,’ he explained. Which then made more sense. Revisiting his expectations, he went on to tell me I could start with simple exercises, lifting and stretching my arms because that was the section of which most of the work would be done.’”

Rey went on to read about her failures and successes through the physical training. Other athletes had been there and then fucking Andrew Snoke. She would ask Gwen to get him away from her at all times, which Gwen thought was odd, but did, until a few weeks in when he explained he had to be there, he was transitioning into the field. 

“May 5, 2014

That motherfucker won’t leave me alone. When Gwen is with me he’s gawking, staring at my glands, and what’s worse my fucking injury like he’s stripping me with his eyes. Like he’d love to meet the fucker that did it to shake his hand! I go through my routine to a T and then leave or wait in her office waiting for Dr. Johnson. I tried telling him Snoke stresses me out and while he looked at me like I had three heads, my glands were obviously smaller. He told me I would need to see Dr. Tano again to be sure it was stress and not something neurological. 

I called Mom with his phone and she made the appointment that moment, saying she would see me in the hospital. Great. That just leaves trying to leave the office and get outside without Snoke putting his hands on me.”

Rey goes on to read about the scan and results. Dr. Tano explained that my pituitary gland is intact. The images shown during the scan showed normal hormonal thought processed and endorphins, as well as activity through the brain stimulating the rest of her body. So the good news is, it’s truly stress. The bad news is, it’s stress. Stress can build an anxiety that can be lethal. Rey explained that she told Dr. Johnson about Snoke, which furthered Dr. Tano’s assessment, confirming to remove Snoke from the picture until she felt like she was in the right amount of control. Dr. Tano also suggested classes for self defense, telling it would help, offering a picture of her at Rey’s age, as a level three black belt. 

And so her self control would be erected from the ashes of this. Rey focused on the task at hand. Three months of straight up ignoring Andrew, like he wasn’t even there, overlapping with martial arts with Anj, before packing up and surfing for the rest of the day or until her body started to feel weak which she made mention to in her journal for the first two months after recovery. 

By September she was released back into the circuit in her usual spot with her friends. Interviews would be kept to a minimum but the doctors and trainers would show up to watch her, their exemplary work showing in full force back on Tython flirting with danger, in showy rounds with T and Anj. ‘It was something really special to see’ they said. ‘It was like seeing your most delicate work learn to fly. - Dr. Johnson.’

As they finished journal, and Rey closed it, she looked up to Ben’s forehead lowering to hers. He rubs into hers. Thankful for her, inwardly ready to kill Snoke, but who wouldn’t? Especially now that Luke knew, they knew she’d be safer. Rey pulls him down for a hug, asking if he’d like to eat. He bobs his head over her shoulder, and looks up to see her friends and the rest of the staff, in the dark, holding the gear from the day, gathered gaping as they heard the whole thing. His initial thought is they aren’t there, blinking confirms they did. Ugh. In front of them all, he leans down to her gland cautiously but claiming her licking a broad stripe over her gland, all the way up her carotid artery, stopping just under her ear. This was a warning. 

Having no experience with it though, Rey returns the act, unaware of the crowd, making him jump, but clutching on to her that much more. 

“Let’s go home, ok?” She purrs into his embrace. 

She doesn’t have to ask twice. Ben gets up with her still in his arms, pulling both her bag, and his over his shoulder, walking through the crowd of his peers and her friends waiting patiently to close up. Rey freezes when she sees them, but notices Ben’s scent going through every single emotion like a broken mood ring. Another lick, and light suckle on his vein makes him sound as if he was purring. 

“Order in?” He manages. At her nod they retreat in. 

After dinner, Ben doesn’t let Rey from his sight. Instead he’s everywhere she is. The shower, the bedroom making sure she’s got everything she needs, and his scent, ‘plenty of scent,’ he thinks. 

Ben’s voice is starting to return to him after countless cups of hot tea and honey, which Luke had actually stuffed in his bag before bringing it down, with a note telling him he’d be on first aid all day again tomorrow. It was a way for him to keep them out of the spotlight, which is what they needed due to the audience that evening. 

Rey picks up 2015, “this one has pictures,” she smiles. Rey explains that after crap that happened... “Jaina didn’t feel right calling me ‘sunshine’ anymore. She needed something solid, reassuring.... something strong, with real meaning.’ The more time the crew spent with each other, Jaina took interest in how I would write to you.”

Ben looks on seriously giddy to see pictures still having to wait until March to see the crew at Tatooine Shores. He took in how her shy smile would play out in a lot of the pictures. They had pictures of the scenery, or the girls doing tricks he couldn’t fathom anyone would do on any type of board. They reworked their styles, making modifications to their boards to help with the acrobatics they would try in practice. Rey explained each one, getting back to written entries, which then pulled her back into Jaina’s interest in who her friends at home were. 

“June 17 2015

Jay-Bee saw the collage I made out of the pictures I had stollen from the guard shack over the years, having me explain who they were and how important they were to me. I’ll have to say it was a process. I feel better welcoming Jay in like that, telling me that she wanted to meet all of you. And then of course we get to you and I broke down. I literally couldn’t say a word. So she hugged me.

Teasingly, she assured me I don’t smell yet, and then pressed on figuring this -you were the root of my stress. Not you particularly, but leaving you. I’d explained I was on contract until the end of 2017, and probably can’t try to go back until well into the following year due to the politics and processing it would take to finish. I told her I wanted to be out of the public eye before returning. By then, I was able to explain who you were, who you were to me, and actually gave your name knowing she wasn’t some prick looking to publish something. I trusted them like family, so now they know you’re Ben Solo. 

Jay with her ‘nickname know how’ worked out what it would be, reading your name a tad saying, ‘well he’s done being Solo. As in he’s been Solo, but he’s got you sooo, now you’re ‘Reylo.’’ I couldn’t stop smiling honestly. As simple a pairing as it was, it never crossed my mind. She took out her phone and sent a mass text telling everyone to only call me Reylo.”

From there everything, even my confidence returned to me. The remainder of events that year went smoothly. “I still hadn’t presented but the stress was leaving. I figured I was so late I didn’t have a chance in the world to have children, but my mind was made up, if it wasn’t you, it wasn’t anyone.”

“July 1, 2015

Listen this has gone on long enough, I can’t sit by and not just say it already. You’ve got to be - you’ve had to of carried on by how but I just, I need to tell you. I love you, Ben Solo. I don’t consider myself crazy either. I mean this might be, but I don’t think I am. I think I’m just saying it for what it was and what it is now. I just, I want everything for you. Even if it’s not me.” 

A series of pictures are posted after showing her nickname actually printed on her sweats. There’s a picture of her throwing her thumbs back, pointing at it happily.

The next was of her close up to the camera excited to have her heat number resemble his last name as 5010, pinching the tops of the heat number’s fabric with a side smooch perked lips pointed towards it. The sun shining brightly behind her casting a lovely leafy shade slightly over her.

Under it was a section explaining that moment. 

“July 23, 2015

They said I have to wear a shirt to put my number on. I’m not doing that. I never wear a shirt... or shorts for that matter. It could be cold as shit. I’m not doing that. Sha-BB said she could sew it on to my top.” 

An arrow directs her to the next page showing Rey within her hands behind her back allowing it to be folded and sewn to her top causing quite the commotion. She knows that one got published somewhere. 

“We’ll have to look tomorrow, see if ‘Peak’ has it.” Ben makes note. 

There are pictures and tiny segments of what they’re doing. There’s one she’s most fond of explaining she has to use an alternate board for because she was not digging into her board. ‘T had an extra one saying she was originally going to try riding with Jacen but figured I could handle it better.’ The board is what they joke about, ‘knotted’. They’re knotted in two spots roughly seven inches apart, set with locks and keys, with a strap connecting the two down the center of the board, so when you yank the board, you actually have control over it. Well the plan was to let the two of them drop in first and then me right after, dropping in straight down and hard so when I pushed on the tail it would jerk the nose up high enough to flip over them as they passed. But I didn’t clear Jacen. He was too low. So now I have to replicate pausing on his board every time I’m out with them. Mom said yoga is good for strength, which I really hadn’t been doing since the fight. I guess I’ll be restarting that too. Landing though, that’s a bitch. I have to land carefully or I can dislocate my shoulder easily. It’s going to be work but the guys have nothing on it. Kanan and Zeb have been ‘harassing us’ about it all day. I was just about ready to let them try by Jacen said no. He wasn’t going to be clobbered by either one of their huge bodies.”

The majority of the rest of the year were the crew screwing around acing every location, enjoying awesome food until Rey finally presented. 

“November 19, 2015

Presenting for me didn’t go by the book obviously. Presenting was god damnit I can’t put words to it. I fucking smell like everything I eat, mixed with my usual shampoo and soap, and sex, like cunt smell. That’s what I’m told by some of the guys here. Candy they call it. 

Jacen’s been helpful. Not like weird, but he’s been talking me though it. To kind of know my body. If it feels wrong, like the heat of my body will escalate when I deal with my first hard heat, or if my glands get itchy or I feel weak... to get someone I trust to escort me home immediately. I haven’t felt those things at all but the awkward conversations that we had today will last me a life time. He explained a lot and what helped him. Obviously, I doubt you want to know, but I’m rambling it here so that I don’t forget. I want to but I’m not home. I’m not with you or someone I can trust outside of the crew. He asked if I went through one if I’d be handling it on my own or with someone... and I fucking stared a hole through him. Like do you not get the weight of what you just asked me? ‘If it’s not Ben, it’s no one.’”

He stops her right there, wanting to hear more but not completely caring anymore. The time had flown by as she poured the day’s out to him, already being well past eleven. Her voice a little strained from reading. Yawning into him, stretching her body over his, “This, you, you’re all I’ve ever wanted Ben.” 

He nods into her lovingly planting kisses into her lips, “I know. Enough now. Sleep, Reylo.”

She smirks, nuzzling down onto him, kissing his at his heart until she passes out for the night.


	9. A Little Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose confronts Ben about the red book.
> 
> Preparations are being finalized for the fundraiser.

His mind is full, trying to process everything she’s shared with him. Rey, over the next few days, would no doubt tell him everything else, being unscathed by the heaviness of what she was actually sharing. It was what he missed and he wanted it. Their mornings would be the same, up around two, handling her routine, practicing steps in self defense, reading to Ben or sleeping until 5:30am getting ready for yoga in the following hour which had become much more than a few good friends screwing around before dawn. Eventually the whole staff was in attendance, even if they didn’t surf. Those who didn’t would bring their breakfast and sit in the chairs, enjoying the sight. Each and every time, starting at Mile 9 as she had in the past. It was welcoming to Rey to know that she was, finally actually home. 

Acclimated. 

By the time Rey had the fundraiser all figured out with Mom, and the crew, she was ready to tell Rose. “When you’re down, Rose, we need to surf. Like bad.” Rey coaxes. Knowing her friend, she knew that was code for something ‘juicy’ was going on, which literally had her beg any roving guard to sit. First was Hux, who she fucked up calling him Red, now Rose would get several chores instead of surfing. 

“God damn him, and his pretentious bastardly ways. I swear to God he’s the only person on the planet that can’t sport a good nickname.” Rose would all but be called by her name unless it was Rey. Finn started calling her ‘tea cup’ after her admission to not seeing a true use for tea of any kinds, and well her last name basically sounded like it anyways. Rey shrugged, leaving ‘Hugs’ alone now being marked by Ben. In all of her nasty little kink books, she found a trend of mates being territorial of each other. It made more sense to Rey now, being home with Ben. She would end anyone who hung around him too long too but it never got to be like that. At least when she was close. 

Honestly, Rey doesn’t know how to hide her excitement. The event is in five weeks and would really prefer Rose’s involvement. They’re best friends, needing no other explanation for her excitement, Rey waits impatiently for her to come down. 

“It must be really juicy if you can’t sit down Rey! Give me a hint?” Teased Rose. 

“I don’t think any amount of hints are going to help. It’s REALLY BIG—“

“It’s obviously Solo then...”

“Nope! I mean I won’t deny— but that’s not what I’m talking about.”

Rose squeals with laughter. “Ok, ok does it have to do with food?”

 

“Oh boy, twenty questions? You’re not going to get it. And I have to tell you away from here because you’re going to lose your shit.”

“I’ll be mad?”

“No but you might faint.”

“So you want me to be in the water? Smart place Rey.”

“I won’t let you drown you turd. But I can’t have anyone know yet.” Rose’s eyes widen, “big surprise.”

Rose pushes for the radio, telling anyone that gets her off of ‘Mile 4’ chair 3 with her board in tow, would get an hour of her pay. Dee and Lars basically fought each other trying to get to the chair first. Rose actually loves the battle, but it does wind up to be Dee who gets there first. “Alright! Thanks Dee!” Rose jumps off the stand into the stand, still in front of it while he climbs to join Maliki. “Sorry Mal’” She says over her shoulder, “Important business -you know.” Waiting for Dee to get settled, she turns to grab her board, running now with Rey to the waves, screeching, “THANKS DEE!” Dee just shakes his head at the sight of them.

Finally within the waves with her best friend, Rose basically begging for everything to spill. 

“Ok, ok! I know it’s been a messed up week being home and catching up and all— I just want you to know I’m so thankful for you. You’ve been strong through all of this and I just. You’re—“

“Don’t propose to me Rey, I’m not your type.” She grins wickedly. 

Rey kicks Rose’s board with a grin. “Oh shut up!” She giggles, “listen- Remember what I told you and the guys about the fundraiser?”

Rose slaps the water with both palms opened creating a huge splash. “are you going to surf it?”

“Ye- about that.” 

Rose’s face contorts, “you have to. You’re home! You have—“ Rose catches saltwater in her face from a splash from Rey.

“Are you going to let me talk or what?” Roses hands fly up accepting this, “Ok. I’m going to surf it, but so will Jaina, Jacen, Tanal, Anja, Sabine, Zeb, Kan—“

“Are you telling me?” She can’t formulate a full question “Are you shitting me right now?” 

“Nope. It’s going to be big.” Rose squeals again, “Listen. Kaydel can’t know.”

“Obviously!” Rey explains the crew’s involvement and that the doctors agreed to it. “Oh my fucking—what?!”

“You heard me. A lot of them go way back to like kids...it’ll be nice to see them but this is for K. K. Cee.” Rey explains. 

“K.K.Cee?”

“Kaydel-when you meet Jaina you’ll understand.” Rey rolls her eyes in memory of her names. 

“Oookay, so what are my limits? Can I tell the guys or is this purely just us?”

“Let’s say just us for now. Solo knows.”

“I’m sure he does,” Rose starts to cackle, “tell me,” suspicious about the red book she knows is missing, “what else does he know?” 

“He knows all of it and more... he stole your red book and I swear to you if I’m not being watched by binoculars right now from whatever chair he’s in I’d say we passed a milestone.” Rey snorts. “That book was the gamey portion of shit I know you would have been ok with reading but, God, Solo cannot. I’ve already ruined a good portion of deli meats and soups for him based on my period during presenting. I’m pretty sure he’s gotten to the part where Jacen literally told me literature and a toy makes all the difference if I do have my heats on my own. Even gave me a few online shops to work with that are experienced in ‘natural’ limbs. ‘Lewd Lady’ being one of them.” 

Rose’s mouth opened and shut. Then again, “anything good in there for alpha women?”

“Not sure. I haven’t had to look. I still haven’t had one. Pretty sure I won’t...”

“But if you do— you won’t need one...” she laughs. 

All too soon Ben is by Rey’s side, curiously eyeing the two. Still laying on his board from paddling, “well, you got silent fast. Any chance I might find out why?”

Rose looks up at the sky with a huff, ‘what the hell is it with guys and needing to know everything?’ “I don’t know, Solo. Any chance I could persuade a trade for information?”

Rose has played this game before and Ben knows enough not to engage in eye contact but does anyway. It’s a show of dominance as an Alpha, it’s just something they have to do. Against Hugs it’s nothing. Another man? It could be something else. But against Rose, a puny little alpha woman? She could get him scrambling to get to the moon in her sideways stare. “What kind of information?”

Rey pulls her legs up from the water that straddled her board, now leaning back on the heels of her palms, with her toes now up by the nose. Not a distraction per-say, but definitely becoming one. 

“I’m pretty sure you know what I’m looking for.” Rose said dryly. 

“You’re going to have to be a little more descriptive than that, Rose.” Ben tried to hide that he knew what she was asking for and failing terribly. His eyes cast all over the sky like a kite in the wind. The more detail she gave had him nibbling at his lip and blush rapidly.

“You look like you got a lot of sun today,” she teases. “Sunblock should help with that. Maybe some zinc.” She stops a beat, smiling at Rey, “you know what I’m dying to know about, in your little book there is just how kinky your omega actually is. Presenting is a motherfucker. You’re not in heat” pointing at Rey “or rut yet” wafting herself with her own fingers to her shoulders off the side of them. “So it’s not like you’re completely losing your shit humping or prodding everything into you... but it’s not like you’re not making a list.”

Ben drops his head on his board with a loud thunk. He knows he read that. Can’t look at food the same way. Deep down he knows he’ll be calling orders in to the deli and have it delivered so he doesn’t imagine his little omega bouncing on their hardest salami stick. ‘Motherfucker I should have just listened.’ 

The girls try not to show their amusement. Then Rose strikes up another conversation about it. “When did you start enjoying your porn lits?”

‘Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!’ Ben hides his head under his arms, folding them behind his head, hoping he could just disappear. ‘Why did I come out here?’ He groans. 

“I didn’t figure that out until Jacen told me about them a couple years back. God, my first one, I seriously had to hide from Mom, covering it like you would a text book for school. I seriously drew seashells and shit all over it so that it wasn’t obvious I was reading it.” At Ben’s turned face now to her, watching the blush sweep her skin too, “it was called ‘Calls of Darkness’ a good versus evil trope, they fall hard for each other but it’s angsty as fuck. And when they did finally get along—good God,” Rey drops her head off the back of her shoulders, and Ben is certain he can’t stand up without calling attention to himself. 

Rose cackles yet again. “You know, I really am having a hard time believing that you didn’t take it Solo.”

“Fuck you, Rose,” He swats one of his big hands through the water splashing her in her entirety. Hearing Rey giggle, he splashed her too, finally on an evening plain. 

“Clearly you’re not handling it well.” She teases yet again. 

Finally he admits it gaining a howl of laughter from the girls, groaning in defeat.

“So what’s your favorite part then Solo?” Rose, not expecting him to respond.

“Alright, alright,” noting his discomfort, Rey pushes water at her friend, “he’s embarrassed enough.” Sinking into the water off her board to hang on his. Nosing into his space she kindly purrs, “You could have just said you wanted to read it and I’d of let you. No secrets, Alpha.” Rey sets him up sweetly. 

Rose takes it as her time to go back ashore, “I am not looking to be a part of this. —careful about what audience you say that in because if it’s a bunch of dudes, you’re going to have a real problem.”

“Not when I’m around, Rose.” Ben deadpans.

“Uh huh,” teasing and dropping in. 

The pair watch on as she goes. Their faces still close, creating caverns of flesh for the lapping waters sloshing over his board to pool in. His face now higher than hers by way of protection. Had he not been fully wanting, he’d of pulled her onto mount his board too.

“Is there anything I might be able to help you with... before we go ashore, Alpha?” 

His eyes ablaze by a desire she could only imagine in her nasty little novels, Ben lowers his head matching its level to his shoulders, “what do you have in mind, sweetheart?” Saliva pricks the corners of her mouth, giving way to a small sweep of her tongue around the area, sending the message straight to his groin. “...and how do you plan on that, little one?” His voice, quite honestly the deepest she’s ever heard it. 

“Turn the board to the horizon.”

He does.

“Sit up.” Quirking her brow with her half smug smile widening brightly, enjoying his strain in being both caught and exposed. “Free yourself, Ben.” She whispers over the trickling sound of the waves over her chest and arms still clutched to the expanse of the width of his board. 

With a shuddering breath and nervous hands, he lowers his waistband just enough to release himself to her, bare to the sea breeze, hoping to God they’re far enough out and no patrons especially can see. He leans forward back in towards the nose trying to hide himself from the possibility of it all, sweat begins to bead, mixing with the ocean spritzes. The nerves of this make him twitch, waiting, wanting .. so.. so ready. Rey, who’s drinking in the sight of all of these emotions washing over him is high on his scent. Her pupils completely dilated, the pit in her abdomen growing to a true intensity knowing full well she’s spilling arousal into the sea. Through his breaths, his eyes wrenched shut, he feels her, finally, covering him somewhat at the base of his member. The groan he tried to hush could have beaconed the waves that followed as they came in choppier than the usual flow. 

Careful not to thrash around, she holds his velvet steel shaft, stroking where she could hold him. Where she lacked, her tongue licked. Suckling first at the base of him, finding the bucking he’d been gyrating into her face, welcome. Below the surface her core begged for him to pound her out moaning in response. This was certainly not expected. Now licking a stripe over his own, lapping at his head, in small tasteful ways, portraying need to her alpha. Needing him to know she’ll take care of him in all ways, even if it meant sucking him off in public. Licking over him, sweeping over his significant swell of precome, Ben becomes a mess of swears and promises. As she takes him, whining her own sighs, he can’t help but want to hold her head down onto him, bucking and grinding and begging all the way through his climax. If he could scream her name he would but being outside in front of a crowd did dark things to him. 

Squeezing his shaft once more to pull out what ever was missed from his glorious load, he watches on as she sucks him dry, trying to get the last bit of come from her alpha. “I’m keeping that book omega. And Rey? I want you to start writing again, about us, so I can read my special bed time story every night.”

“I think your kink might be the ‘written word’ Ben.” Pulling his shorts open helping him repack his softening self back into his suit. 

He huffed a sigh teasing her right back. “And I think you like being in control.” He kisses her sweetly.

“Hmm,” Rey purrs. “I like a lot,” she winks.

Back at chair 3, Maliki stares on, pretty fucking sure Dee is too. “You know there’s legitimately a hundred people in front of us and all I can fucking do is wish I was Solo.” Mal grounds out. 

Dee, unscathed by it, but dying to jack with his guard mate says, “maybe you could ask for a turn? See how fast Solo disembodies you?”

“Yeah yeah... still I’d of never guessed Kenobi to turn into such a greedy little...” a ball of wet sand slaps him in the balls, “what the fuck?” He looks around quickly. “Seriously, Rose What the hell?”

Knowing Maliki is all about sex all the time, gladly watching all of those nature shows, and pornos on his phone. Hell, he’d enjoy watching bugs joined throughout the day, brining up how hard it must be to fly and be balls deep in another creature, sex seems to just always be on his mind. The sand was a welcome slap in the balls. Rose knew not to fling it in his face. She wasn’t that much of a bitch. At least she thought she wasn’t. It was debatable. 

“Not a word of this Mal. Not a word.” 

Standing to wipe the sand from his shorts, “why?”

“Its not your place. And besides, I wouldn’t fuck with them...”

“Yeah, yeah... Solo Revenge.”

“Clearly you don’t known how nasty Rey can get. If you want your dick still attached your body, I’d leave them and their doings alone.” Rose finally got his attention.

Maliki straightens. As Rose passes, she tosses another over her shoulder up at him for good measure. Dee can only watch on in delight.

——-  
Jakku Beach  
Weeks Later  
——-

In the following weeks, word has gotten out that Rey Kenobi has made her return. It was bound to happen, especially now that everyone has phones and access to internet everywhere at all times. Videos had been posted of her surfing or snapped of her laying out next to Ben’s chairs. Humble enough to pose for pictures at times with young surfers and sometimes even older ones. Nerves would kick in for poses with patrons of her own age, but Ben was never far from reach. 

All throughout the day, he’d scent her. A bite, he read, had to be done while her gland was on fire, to take his scent inside her, and yet they’ve all stayed within range of her usual golden color. Ben can’t help but be frustrated by this. He wants the world to know she belongs to him. Unmistakably. Completely his. 

The photographs wing up on major social media sites, comments from all angles, spying her little marks and claiming to be the ones that will change her world. All anonymous, hiding behind screen names, but the threat, he feels, is real. 

Being without a phone, Rey is blissfully unaware of what people are saying. Focusing only on checking up with her friends, sponsors, and being sure to book enough space in the resorts around the strip for everyone in attendance. Thankful to everyone but especially Kaydel for that little tidbit. 

It soon became time to tell the boys there jobs, which Rose took upon herself to explain. Leaving Rey to plan out the rest with Kaydel herself. They planned on where the food would be set up, times for the contests down the strip and best of all ‘Mile 5-Center Stage’ making sure there wasn’t a repeat of her boldness in a new child prodigy since it would no doubt be a crowded party wave, all day long. She knew her friends only stopped for food and to shit. ‘Thank you Jacen.’ Sleep was necessary only at the very end of the day or if a storm came in. Otherwise, ‘I’ll sleep when I’m dead,’ another Jacen original, came to mind. 

“I can’t believe it’s the end of August already,” Kaydel starts, playing with the rings of her notebook. “I’m really looking forward to Thursday. I mean I know you’ve been here a while now, and all” Kaydel continues looking out to the beach from the Guard Shack’s windows, “But it’ll be nice to see you engage in a competition again.”

Rey nods, playing with the pages of a magazine she’d been doodling on giving nothing away. “It would be better if you could be out there too.”

“I know.” She hangs her head casting her vision to the floor. “I know.”

Rey’s so tempted to tell her but she literally had two more days. ‘Secrets,’ she thought... ‘ugh.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry a little shorter than my usual length but it was necessary.


	10. The Golden Moon Festival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben gets som clarity from Hux at a price.
> 
> The Golden Moon Festival is in full effect. The crew finally makes it after hours. Enjoys time introducing themselves. 
> 
> Kaydel’s surprised the night before.
> 
> Ben stands up for Rey.

“You look like death, Solo.” Poe starts, looking at his friend’s exhausted, war torn face. Nodding at his phone, “what’re’ya reading?”

Ben ignores him, scrolling through the nasty posts all over the Internet, growling at each one like a possessed animal. 

Poe, lacking common sense for his relationship with Ben, leans forward and grabs the device. Looking down at Ben’s menacing face. “Easy buddy. I asked you a question.” Poe starts reading where Ben left off, “Oho, Okay! Why are you reading this shit?”

Ben stays silent, figuring Poe will only make it worse. Poe has a tendency to get louder with every passing syllable. There was no chance he’d open up about his personal feelings. Not to Poe. Not ever. At least he thinks until Poe reacts to some of the bullshit he’s been reading for the last few days. 

“This is some messed up shit.” Entranced by Ben’s phone, Poe nearly misses the chair he’s trying to sit in, sending him and the plastic chair sailing a few inches back from the table. He doesn’t flinch, instead looks up at Ben, questioning him about the murderous look in his eye. “What’s this all about, Solo?”

He tried almost everything to keep him from trying to say it when Hux walks up to sit and eat his lunch. “He’s in love with Rey, and pissed he can’t mark her, and because she’s infertile if he does it won’t take or mean anything to any one- at all,” Hux looks at Ben, “aren’t I right, Solo?”

Both men look at Hux questioningly. 

“Don’t think I don’t know... we are all experiencing this show,” he says dryly. Taking a bite of his sandwich, and chewing thoroughly, he offers another point, “if she really is infertile and you still love her past the alpha-omega standard for mating, why don’t you just marry her? You know, like normal people?”

The gears in Ben’s brain start turning, ‘marriage?... of course! That way people would see a ring on her finger by way of promising us to each other.’ The color in his face turned up a pleasant glow back in his alabaster tone. Poe looks on dumbstruck that Hux was actually helpful, offering a handshake to him, and then to go out for drinks after work. Maybe he wasn’t such a dick after all. 

This gave Ben some thought to this figuring it could honestly be the only way to make it official. If not for a mark, this would be just as obvious as the love the two of them shared. 

“Now the real challenge is making it memorable for her. Like you didn’t just go pick up the first one you saw to get the job done.” Hux continues. 

“Why are you being so helpful?” Asks Ben. 

“Honestly, I want something from the two of you, and you know exactly what it is.”

“Man—I don’t swing—“

Ben kicks Poe under the table. “Deal.”

“And about the others?”

“We’ll spread the word.”

At Hux’s nod, they return to their conversation leaving Poe confused. “Solo, what did I just miss?” He asks tossing the phone back at Ben. 

“He hates the nicknames and wants it to stop. Do you think you could do that?”

Poe sighs in exasperation. 

Hux asks deep rhetorical questions getting Ben to actually think this through. Figure out why he really wants this, and surely explains it can’t just be a symbol that she’s taken. Ben thinks long and hard about it, well back to when they first met, deciding that he wanted whatever he got her to reflect in that moment, and something that ties in the present. “So when do you think you’ll propose?” 

Hux pulls Ben through his thoughts, answering, “as soon as possible.”

The Rise of the Golden Moon Festival had started on Sunday, filling the streets and beach with people, more so than usual, all throughout all times of the day. A heavy police presence was available to the city of Jakku with Bazine leading the initiative, checking in constantly with her squadrons all over the city and then of course all over the beach making sure Luke was in constant contact. She felt it, since the day Rey made time to call her within the first week of being home, Bazine was going to make sure she and everyone else was protected. 

The whole city was decorated and alive. Lanterns were strung through the streets from deep within it, all the way out to the shore, signifying shops and restaurants to celebrate in if food trucks weren’t your fancy. Every eatery and catering service had new foods to try based on each day of the event too. Music filled the streets and softened only slightly in the sand. There had been nightly concerts on ‘Mile 4’ by all types of artists including Jakku natives. 

All throughout the day guards were on high alert due to the influx of people. “I’ve never seen it quite like this,” admits Rose. They’ve already had multiple bathers pulled out for attempting swimming outside of the lagoon. Plenty from inner cities where the most they’ve swam in is their baths at home. Surprisingly, mostly adults, and further more women. 

Rey does her usual routine throughout this week too, much to Ben’s dislike. He’d rather have her where he knows she’s safe... but it’s her own free will that brought her back to him. He couldn’t chance it and command her to stay out of sight. So she stayed by his side reading, following him chair to chair. On down time she’d walk with him back to the shack or first aid, or help him with roving duties, excited just to be in his presence. 

This break has them back at the Guard house listening to small talk buzzing around about the latest changes to the fish taco or sushi roll from Syndula’s. 

Luke responds to a phone call on the first ring, annoyed he’s been on and off of it all day. “Rey?” Luke calls her over, “It’s for you.”

Rey’s hold loosens from Ben’s as she makes her way over to the desk, fingering the volume control since Kaydel is in with them, she cautiously asks who it is. 

“REYLO!!” Jacen’s voice rings through over Jaina’s. “Hay girl, haaaayyy.” 

“I’m hanging up,” she teases turning down the volume. 

“Wait! Wait! No. No. No. No.” Jaina smacks Jacen and pulls her silky brown hair up in a high ponytail, allowing Reylo’s voice to holler her answer through the van cackling at the calls coming from her friends excited to arrive. “We’re like three hours out, should be in around 8pm or so. Just tell me one thing ok? And I need to hear it from you.”

“Anything.” 

“How fucking excited are you?”

“Jay-Bee are you serious? How excited? Really? I’m floored by this!” Rey sniffs. 

“Oh cut that out,” Jaina teases. 

“Yeah yeah, call me when you get in. We’ll go out, all of us. I can’t wait for you to meet everyone. Then we can get some food at the festival, maybe build a bonfire.” She doesn’t have to look at Luke’s expression. He prompts her with his sideways stair which she’s now expertly aware of especially when she and Ben are alone...anywhere.

“Food?!” Jacen tells from the back. “Yes! You know I only came for food!”

Rey blows raspberries at the phone. “Listen, were not going to be here much longer so let me give you Rose and Ben’s numbers just in case.”

“Let ‘em fly. One of us is ready. I’m driving.”

Rey gives both numbers and is extremely bouncy borderline jittery to see them. 

“Who was that?” Asks Kaydel. 

The room falls completely silent and Rey pipes up, “a few good friends.”

———  
Jakku Beach  
8:30pm  
———

Ben’s phone starts to buzz with a number he doesn’t know. Still on the beach with his arms possessively around Rey watching the sunset he answers, “Hey tell Rey were parking, and we’ll meet up with you soon by the Oasis.” The caller hangs up, with an “oh shit,” he smiles at it and thinks maybe one of Bazine’s officers stopped them, before relaying the message to Rey. 

Rey shifts in his hold just by mere fractions, pressing her palms softly but generously into his back, pulling him snugly into her body. “I can’t believe this is really coming together,” she says as she gently draws the tip of her nose over his chest. 

He croons into her hair, “all because of you.”

Rey smiles into him holding him tighter. “No. This was a group effort.” Faintly for a second Rey hears a pumping bass filling the air over the concert that was taking place. “There here...” she stays with Ben watching as Jaina drives up Main to park where she was told, with Jason holding the back skateboarding up with a soda in his hand. While his figure was small, she couldn’t help but laugh and nod at him. 

Ben watches her respond to her friends who leave their boards attached to the van, surging full speed to her. Jaina, Ben realizes is a little thicker muscularly than Rey but aside from obvious facial differences, they look quite the same. Tanal was darker skinned than he recalled in the issues of ‘Peak’ she had been posted in, dark like rum infused caramel. She’s tall and thin, with dark curly hair. Their facial features were too small to really recognize as his distance from them was still too great. He spied who looked like Anja, her bright red hair was enough of a giveaway, her shape similar to Jaina. Jacen reminded Ben of a shorter version of himself, smaller but toned, looking like a rail of muscle, and soft sun bleached brown hair, making streaks appear within it. Still more characters come, a seven footer he’s sure of it, built more like Ben, but bald. 

He watches on as they book it towards the group of guards. Rey kisses at Ben’s heart softly before removing herself from his hold. “JAY-BEE” she squeals, taking off towards them. Ben knew she was fast just based on how she ran to Rose, but, shit, seeing her run at this speed did things to him. A slight tinge of jealousy harbors within him when she goes and is accepted by all of them. Jaina reaches her first, bear hugging her when Tanal, Anja, and the guys make it to her too. The group hug has him stirring, his scent spiking violently. Other alphas around Rey. They must have gotten it though, as they both pop up looking bewildered at the same time. 

Rey giggles, “come on! Let me introduce you.” The guards and her friends have since gotten up to meet everyone, except for Ben who stands motionless, looking on at the group. He knows this was just some of the lot coming, and is curious about just how many respond to Rey the same way, or more flirtatiously, it has him shaking - literally vibrating a consistent fury right through him. “Alpha?” Rey approaches, “why didn’t you come with me?” She listens as he lets out a furious breath. Rey knows he won’t be able to say it with the group there, so instead she asks him to mark her, “scent me,” nosing into his space, “for all to see.” 

He doesn’t need a second invitation, his right hand steadily planted on her hip, while his left roams up her back, entrapping her hair at the top of her neck, enough to contain the move from claiming kisses, making it almost as awkward as a scene from a movie, moving his mouth over each of her glands, licking stripes over each one. Now in a daze Rey can’t help but stagger when she moves. 

Jaina being her usual boisterous self howls at the couple. “OWW!” She screeches as she usually does for anything exciting, dropping her fists behind her and flexing her legs and core yelling the howl up to the sky. “Shit! Reylo! I mean we knew about Ben,” she swears a string before continuing, using her hand to wave a washing motion over his frame from where she stood, “but we didn’t KNOW about him! Fuck he’s gorgeous!” 

Rey giggles, keeping her hand encircled around his backside, “this is Jaina.”

Jaina corrects her with her nickname, then introduces everyone by nickname to the guards. “Anja, goes by Anj though,” she said. 

“Why’s that?” asks Hux, knowing he can’t stand nicknames either. 

Anj speaks for herself, looking over her shoulder, softly turning to him, unlike the rest of the staff has ever done. ‘She moves like an angel.’ He thinks. 

“I surf with Tanal. She’s “T” and I used to be “A”. Think about it.” She sighs at his expression. “I didn’t need to have a bunch of kids calling us ‘T&A’ or just being ‘ass’. So Anj was good enough.” She speaks to the group but stairs down Hux, who is mesmerized by her. 

Poe leans in, introducing him by his first name, “but everyone calls him Hux.”

Hux blinks, “Right, that’s correct.” Offering his hand to the lady. When she accepts with a smile, he could just die. Did Poe just use his actual name without being a shit for once? 

“You must be Rose.” Said Jacen, extending his hand. “I’ve heard so much about you...” he lingers. 

Rose blushes as red as her suit. “How much do you know?” She can’t help but laugh, which brings on his own deep groan of a giggle. 

“A lot, but I’m sure there’s more.” Rose can’t help the noticeable swallow he forces down. 

“So!” Poe calls the attention of everyone to him. “Did you want to see Kaydel tonight? Or tomorrow?”

“Was that a real question?” Jaina cocks her head to the side. 

Poe releases a sigh of a laugh. Besides Rose, he’s never felt half as challenged as Jaina. She was clearly their pack leader. “If you guys want we can head out to Maz’s, if it’s not packed.”

“Can I get the address? We’re waiting on more.” She asks. 

“Yeah, who else is coming?” Jaina explains the lot. “Holy... let me um, let me call her and see if there’s—“

“Don’t worry about it. We’re small.” She pats her stomach, “we can pack like rats.”

“Oookay... well let’s go then.” Poe offers the address and Jaina sends it out. 

———  
Maz’s Pub  
10:00pm  
———

Poe leads the group down Main, talking to Zeb and Kanan about their ride and how long they’ve known each other. He explains the festival and the significance of the Golden Moon. “Thousands of years ago, Jakku had been a barren wasteland. Sand for miles.” He sweeps his and out over the city as if it was all desert. “A series of events in the cosmos-“ Jaina starts laughing.

“Cosmos?” Laughing at his word selection. 

Poe lifted his thick eyebrows being stopped abruptly, looking over his shoulder at Jaina, “what would you call it?”

“Outer space?”

“Ok, ok, a series of events in ‘outer space’” his neck jerks when he says it, starring down Jaina.

“Thank you. Much better.” She laughs. 

“Anyways,” He rolls his eyes, “there was a bunch of shit that happened. First it was the sun flairs which eventually brought on the change in the gravitational pull, jolting the entire planet slightly closer to it. In the shift the moon happened to handle a closer cycle, pushing the oceans wildly over the earth. Eventually evening out the moon goes through its orbit, always being at its closest at the end of August. The Golden Moon was said to bring life to Jakku. It brought the ocean, which brought life and an abundance of food to the area, and that’s why we celebrate it. That’s why now the festival focuses on foods from over the centuries, both new and old. It’s why we decorate it and make it feel like a small community rather than a city.” 

Rey leans her head into Ben’s shoulder, enjoying his hold as they all migrate into Maz’s. Her pub was two stories which was odd as far as pubs went, but noticeably ornate from the entrance there were two blonde hard wood staircases on either side, left airy with the walls which would enclose them, exposed by what looked like a floating banister atop a half wall. Sturdy enough to keep drinks from falling off the side of them unless pushed. The first floor was wide open with booths along the parameter eventually stopping giving way to two doorways, one to the kitchen on the left and the bathrooms on the right. In the center Maz’s favorite piece in the whole joint, the bar made from an old ship hull, rounded at the base and painted black. While she loved the way a glass would slide along the polished wood at other bars, hers was special. Her’s was made from her ancestors ship, long ago. Every year Max would tell the story, explaining they were filthy pirates, ready to take all and leave nothing behind. She was theatrical, most of the reason why Poe suggested this pub in particular. 

On the walls behind the bar are floor to ceiling cubbies of her finest brews. Nothing she serves is imported. All the finest, from her heritage, which is always a conversation starter. Jaina looks around especially impressed with it all, even being crammed within the first floor she looks around at her crew who are all enjoying the scenery. Pictures adorn the walls of nautical legends, her family and Rey as a child. ‘A small child’ Jaina thinks. Even the note on the corner shows her age, unable to write smoothly, “she just turned six when she wrote that,” a tiny woman with a bandana came to stand beside her. Jaina’s eyes bulged at the picture of Rey pulling around the crest of a wave at five, just six...just the strength she needed in her tiny body to do such a thing had her shaking her head. “I’m Maz,” she extended her hand.

“Jaina.”

“I know who you are,” she smiles warmly, “Rey has been informative—it’s the happiest I think any of us have ever seen her. And now to have everyone here,” she sighs, “it will definitely be a night to remember. Why don’t you all go up to the bar. First round is on the house.” The ladies exchange gratitude for each other, and head back to the bar. 

Just then Sabine rolls up with the rest of her surf mates, turning heads with her sunset pink and orange ombré colored hair, “Jay-Bee!” Her voice booms just like Jaina’s. The rest of their crew flows steadily behind her. “Where’s Reyl-oh.” Sabine looks over Ben through her. “Well shit!”

“I know! That’s what I said!” The girls have a laugh, at Rey’s blush accepting yet another lap of Ben’s possessiveness hum through her. “You’re going to have to let go of her at some point.” Jaina laughs. “We’re surfing tonight.” 

“In the dark?” Asks Finn skeptically.

“The Golden Moon has enough light to make the lagoon glow,” Rey chimes in out of memories fishing and harvesting clams. 

“Ohooo! She does speak!” Teases Jacen. Getting a few good laughs out of everyone including Rose. 

“Yeah, yeah,” smirks Rey. “Did anyone call Kaydel?”

“She’s on her way,” says Poe. And sure enough, as soon as he speaks, Kaydel passes through the door, searching for Poe. 

“KK CEE!!” Jaina shouts over the intense noise within the pub, silencing it all at once. 

Kaydel went from looking like a deer in headlights to crying in all of about five seconds. Jaina and the crew headed out to bring her in, “It’s so good to see you,” Kaydel cries. They share small talk bringing her down off the emotional ledge when it finally comes out, why they’re there. “You what? Wait what?!”

“It was Rey’s idea.” She said. Kaydel’s head swiveled towards her and Ben, who is starting to wear on her skin. 

“You’re important, Kaydel- to all of us and the sport. It was just the right thing to give my hero.” She smiled, leaning into Ben’s caress.

“Take it easy there, Solo. You’re going to lick her neck clean off.” Teases Poe. When he doesn’t respond, Poe reaches across his seat towards Ben to ta break him from this hypnosis, when he’s startled by a low pitted growl. “Hey man it’s just me,” Poe lifts an eyebrow, “what’s going on?” 

There’s a threat and Ben can sense it. When he pulls away from her to take a sip, she whines. Not annoyingly, but like a scared, whimper.. like she’s sensing a predator. “Somethings not right. I need to go home.” She’s quiet a beat, “home - please.” She shudders. At that Ben stands, excuses them, pays for his drink and moves quickly with Rey out into the open air.

Poe pulls out his phone giving Bazine a heads up about Rey’s suspicion. He asks Rey to be more specific. “I can smell him.”

“Who?” He asks.

“Me.” A tall, older, bald man with shiny blue eyes now with dilating pupils, pushes through the crowd, grabbing her around her neck. “You’ve avoided me for long enough little one,” he says, unscathed at Ben’s possessive hold. “It’s time to finish what we started.”

Ben who had thankfully made Rey read to him gets knocked back in the realization of all of this. Snoke was the one she fought. He’s the one for her pain. He’s most of the reason she can’t go into heat. Ben shoots off of his stool still keeping Rey pressed into him, throwing a punch right into his scrunched condescending face. It’s just enough force to make Snoke release her.

He doesn’t have to say a word, landing fist after fist into this nasty piece of garbage. Maz swats at Ben’s hand after it connects with Snoke’s jaw the final time. His mind is on fire, ready to kill for her. His breathing stills for long enough to remember the packed house. His adrenaline pounding through him, searching for Rey. He turns to see faces he doesn’t know, acquaintances, until he turns left again seeing an impressed Hux and Poe holding onto Rey. His eyes pin her in place, sort of slurring in the buzz of his rage fit, “Let’s go home, Reylo.” He licks at her again, pulling her into his arms protectively, pushing through the crowd into the safety of the darkness.


	11. The Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Ben sticks up for Rey, retreating out into the night, they think they’re in the clear, when really they’ve just begun the fight.

Shellshocked the group they came with to party were all left behind as Ben practically ran with Rey out of Maz’s as if their lives depended on it. Rey who eerily could sense danger sucked in a long breath now being away from it, frowning she sank into a pool of herself and began to cry. She started to shake, hyperventilating into Ben’s hold. “Why? Why,” she swallowed a squeak, “why couldn’t I move?”

Ben grits his teeth, “It’s a submission move,” covering her body with his own becoming shelter like. “That piece of shit used it for control.” 

“He touched me even though you’d been scenting me all night,” wrapping her arms around herself, “what’s wrong with me?” Ben moves to scoop her up taking her down into the sand instead of the streets. A pleasant sea breeze flies across the water welcoming them as they do removing their stresses walking up to one of the stationed quads down on ‘Mile 2’. Protectively Ben sets her down to mount first. Behind her, securing the ride he grips the handles over her hands creating a fortress around her body. 

His shield would take an awful sound of metal to muscle, and once more metal to bone stealing a terrible groan behind her. Rey turned in horror seeing him lifelessly slump revealing Andrew weaponized behind him with a shovel. “Girl, I think we both know who you belong to,” he stretches out his awful gnarly hand looking to grab at her arm. 

Rey pulls away in fear launching herself away from this man, terrified of that tone, scared he’ll grab her throat again. That she’ll succumb to all of her darkest fears. As he chases her down to where the street light’s orange glow falls heavy into the sand, Ben’s eyes blur terribly as he wakes. 

Rey crouches in the sand waiting for the next move. Her muscles jump in anticipation. Trying to slow her breath, she reminds herself that she’s only had Ben’s protection physically for a short time. Years..YEARS she’s been on her own.... years... her panic spikes as Andrew’s eyes pin her in the darkness. She knew this man was fast and strong. Sand would never stop him. He ran circles around the elitist trainers, and even some of the physically topped out surfers were still huffing to keep up with him. Alphas just had that command over their bodies that could prove them in even the most dire of moments to win their mate, and Andrew would use it to stalk all of his prey. 

Rey would be damned if Andrew was going to even try to take that bite. ‘Bite,’ she thought, “oh my God it was you wasn’t it?” She could see his face forming into a terrible smile, wicked and haunting.

“Tell me, Rey, give me everything.” He was amused with himself, the abuse didn’t seem to register with him. 

She stood searching her memories as they flew from her vision off to the sides of her like she’d been walking into the wind. Her eyes low, she tells him nothing. She’s searching for herself. For her rage, she needs it, the focus radiates from her as she pins him with hate. Disgust. Angrily she screams at him, “YOU! You took this from me!” 

A coming storm rumbles in from the horizon, unseen black clouds coat the night sky. Flickering purple lightning flashing through the darkness, striking the horizon like animal claws ripping into the storm on its attack. It was as if the storm told her fury. These animals would have their fight. She would not succumb. He would fall. She was sure he could never feel the satisfaction of owning another weak little girl. Rey believed she would be his demise. 

As the wind shifted, pulling cold air in off shore to the sand, Rey found her strength. Her own sneer crawling across her beautiful face. A warning presses past Andrew as he forwards himself out of the darkness. The wind whipping in a new direction at a moment’s notice, blowing sand up into her face. Just the slightest squint to suppress the need to blink in the presence of this predator would be a second too much. 

Andrew surged forward in the split second as if she didn’t know it would happen. Rey side stepped left as he bombarded her space, rolling in her stance. She needed to protect herself. A bite on any of her remaining glands would surpass the claim of rape. He reaches out at a chance to swipe at her arm but she moved just far enough out of the way, hurling him awkwardly to the side. A chance was all she needed. This was her opening. Running at him with all her fury, she swiveled her body just so, grabbing the back of his head and connecting her knee to his nose.

The man was stunned for the briefest of seconds grabbing at her wrist with success. Andrew twisted it roughly backwards with a scowl that could rip the world apart. He had thought he won in that moment with the shriek licking her wrist had elicited from her lungs. 

Rey however would have gladly lost the arm totally than to allow the man then satisfaction of leaving any mark on her. Fighting her way free, baring teeth of her own, shouting at him, all of the miserable things he’s trained on to her, trying to contain the bile rising in her throat. One more revulsion would have her debilitated just enough for this man to violate her again. 

The storm lurches forward. Lightning strikes closer to the beach and rain begins to pour from the heavens. Roaring from the sky masks her screams. Rain drops heavily from the sky, pounding divots into the sand. Ben blinks as the rain falls onto him. His vision impaired slightly he can barely make out the scene before him but the smell of male lust and Rey’s fury wafting towards him is enough to make him vomit. She was in trouble and he couldn’t help her. Again! Shakily he tries to stand. Other senses had to focus since his eyesight had been so badly impaired. He could hear the thunder, how it shouted with her. Faintly, male growls. Threatening at first, becoming more amused as they shifted from pain and rejection she kept inflicting to spiteful noises trying to command her to mate him. 

Shaking his head to correct himself, he blinked over and over trying to overcome this. He needed redemption, he needed her safety, and whether or not he had been damned from the start, Ben was going to make it. He would be the hero. He wanted her pride. The satisfaction of taking this man down in honor of her. He wanted the pleasure of being hers. Her mate. Her only one. And as he saw it, defending Rey was simply the only way.

Their pheromones and the mix of the saltwater wafted inland calling the oblivious crowd to them from the streets. Ben could hear voices calling out “there she is!” And, “what the hell?” And protests of the growing violence possessing the night. 

Neither of the two look up to see where the sounds are coming from. Rey has gone into full offensive mode, throwing her dainty fists forcefully into this hulking man. 

“Don’t fight it, girl. I will take everything from you and you will still beg me to fuck you into the ground, publicly. You’ll want me to humiliate you like the senseless whores all omegas are. And when I’m done with you, I’ll kill you with the cruelest stroke.” He yanks her arm down hard, threatening the socket, throwing her body down hard at the ground. The force alone has her lungs heaving trying to suck in air. Her vision now swarmed with white and blue stars, trying to figure out how to get up, Rey let’s out a whine. It sends a chill through Ben’s body. The threat is real. He finally stands trying to focus on where it’s coming from since he still doesn’t see well. As his eyes finally focus he sees the bastard looming over Rey ready to strike her, his cruel intentions written all over that smug little face. Ben’s fists tighten as he runs into their battle. 

Rey kicks again at Andrew’s descending frame, using this time for penetration. Barely able to move her upper body, she kicks at him over and over. He laughs at her terror when he cages her in, pushing his body up onto hers, hushing her cries of protest with whispers of promises to end her life quickly after. 

It’s not a second more when Ben buries his foot into the man’s ribs that Rey is able to move her arm, shoving sand into Andrew’s eyes. Limply her arm would fall back like a spaghetti noodle falling off a fork, down onto her chest. The two men continue fighting just out of view when Rose and Jaina find their way to Rey’s side helping her up moving with her back to the boardwalk. 

Bazine and her squads roll up immediately after. Sirens fill the air under the rumbling storm. A wall of rain acts as a curtain concealing the nasty blows they’ve both given and received. It and the threatening lightning have since left a scarcely smaller crowd of witnesses. Officers, including their captain scream at the men to stand down. Andrew smiles as Ben slams him into the ground under him like a rag doll. “Go ahead. Show them what a brute you can be.”

Ben’s blood boils with rage looking at this pathetic waste of an alpha. What scum did he manifest from? Who could he blame for this cultivation of evil trying to take Rey. Stalking her. Hunting her down. He wonders for a moment if she didn’t attack him in the gym if she would have still been safe. The journals. He had proof of all of this. Proof of his psychopathic behaviors, admittance from Rey herself about what happened and how it’s destroyed her physically. How many other women did he do this with? How could he? How could anyone attack a woman, HIS woman, all those years ago? Who could rip glands from under another’s skin, leaving them to bleed out? What monster could do that? Who even thinks like that? The more he questions Andrew’s state of being, the harder he chokes the man between his forearm and bicep.

The man’s contorting face catches the curtains of pummeling rain nearly drowning him where he kneels, half exposed in the sand. Ben freezes as he looks around at the scene enfolding. The pressure on his neck eases but the hold remains. Water rushes from the sky matching the thunders roars hammering the ground with such a tremendous force on and on with gusts of wind that whips up wet sand throwing and stinging their bodies it as if it threw glass. 

He thinks of how many times he’d found Rey on her own, how many times he’d make sure she was ok, stand up for her. How much it would hurt him to think someone, anyone could hurt her if they found her alone. Rey didn’t deserve a life of solitude. His own memories flashed before him the sweet little person she was and all she’d been through. Those journals, everything she shared. The anxiety that would set in for it was far less than it would be now. 

Ben was living all of Rey’s fears back then and for years with this pro surfer now trainer, exploiting his money and power over younger girls—his girl. His. He thought of how awful it was reading she wouldn’t be coming home, and how devastating it would be if he went to jail for the ass beating he was giving this ‘legend.’ He watches as the line of cop’s pull their weapons, knowing full well an Alpha could enrage with a pure destruction found in folklore stories. 

He felt himself losen. Ben’s grip steadily, quickly grabbing the back of his head and slamming it into the ground. Holding it there while the man cackled, choking on a mixture of blood and sand, he’d be held by Ben’s right hand. He’d kneel next to him promising him his death if he ever came in range of Rey ever again. As the rain slowed and the storm passed Ben sat on Andrew’s back until the authorities came in from their stances behind their door shields.

As an alpha, male or female, the rage fits were undeniably awful. Pit that against another trying to take what they cherished, and mix it with the growing numbers society and the needs of their safety, security had to match their dangerous expulsions by brute force within a second’s notice. 

Bazine loves this part of the job. It wasn’t a cruel thing. It was more a promise to keep to the civilians. It was a mark of honor to take down a possessed freak of nature on a hormonal power trip. She would keep her gun drawn, hollering at her squad to move in, “Permission to fire if either move without request!” Her angled face screamed with intensity, promising pain to either of their movements. 

Bazine had been to Maz’s after the initial fight broke out, then had to chase them out of the building, losing Ben and Rey in the night. She had gone back in to find out more about Mr. Snoke finding that he fled too. It wasn’t that no one knew the man. He was popular as far as professional athletes go, but Bazine simply didn’t care. When she guarded, her only mission was the safety of others. The woman ran a tight ship, hollering and whistle screeching through the air loud enough to reach well into the waves. If she didn’t like something, the receptor would know it. And she just did not like surfers. It wasn’t to say she didn’t like the sport, or Rey for that matter. But she was unimpressed with the wave claiming, or the fights it would start in the wake of too many arguments. Jakku Beach, secondly, was a tourist trap. Had it been a private beach, then, fine. Save yourselves. But Bazine sure loved to put those suckers in their place, and night was no exception. 

Ben was hollered to first as he’d been crushing Andrew intentionally with his weight. He was required to move but didn’t the first time. Another officer yelled over Bazine which made her make a mental note as to who she was demoting after this. This was her show. Ben got up, keeping a hold on the man under him, not completely wanting to let go for Rey’s protection. “Hands where I can see them!” ‘God damnit tonight.’ She thought. ‘Did they all just lose their heads together?’

Ben released him all together. Andrew, who was finally free, caught his breath, going on about calling his lawyer and how the entire place would be shut down, on and on as he got up. He shoved into Ben’s shoulder as a warning. Bazine, the expert marksman she was, shot a rubber bullet into Snoke’s chest, knocking the wind right out of him, giving way to another officer’s ability to move in to cuff him. 

Ben stood motionless. He knew how to keep himself in check. He’d practiced for so long. Going down deep within that private place where he stored her stories, the ones she never wrote about. Where they were children. Where he’d practiced again and again to guide her home. That she was safe with him. Every morning she’d bail. As he became wise to it, he’d bring her board inside, past the garage, hindering her enough as to move too carefully to leave. Once, he put it on his old bike rack. It was high enough that she couldn’t reach without moving a chair. That was the last day she came back with him. By then she hit her preteen years and Rey would live with Rose. It was probably more suitable anyways for what she would inevitably be going through. Presenting as a preteen in an alpha household could have been frightening to her. God, a heat with her that young... Ben shakes it from his mind. It would have been so wrong. Would have broken their trust... and that was something he would never want for them. 

Ben knew he needed her. Maybe not romantically then, but certainly needed their companionship. He’d never received anything like it with anyone before. Sure there was Poe and Armitage but they didn’t seem to get him the way Rey did. He didn’t think it was that she was a girl and adept to such comforting just because of her sex. No, the guys were good enough to tease and one up, have their backs as they had his, but brotherhood never seemed to match the connection they had. 

Ben remained in the sand with his eyes lowered, his anger receding, when Bazine approaches him one on one. “Ben?” She asks carefully, “I’ve just been informed that Rey’s been taken back to your apartment with the company of Rose and Jaina. She’s safe. But you will need to come with me.” 

“I need to be with her,” his voice stays low but knows not to threaten a cop. Especially not Bazine while she’s in uniform. 

“No, you assaulted a man in public. You will need to come with me for documentation on the proceedings of this, or you will be arrested.”

His eyes met hers in shock, “What! Bazine! No! Rey —He was..” He stammered on with his hands drawn out in front of him. Flailing them around as he spoke. 

“Save it. I need it documented. And after you’ll see her, but right now this is necessary. Protocol.” Her voice sternly states. He knows, and nods to her to follow.

——-  
Making it back to his apartment he’s greeted first by Jaina. She gives way to a respectful exchange, opening the door and welcoming him in to his own place, which is annoying but he lets it go. All he wants to do is get to Rey. To make sure she’s okay. 

Rose finished up in the shower with her, a faint girlish chatter rules the room. Rose’s attitude on the matter bursts through the wall. Rose had never been quiet. Guarding was a perfect profession for the woman. If she felt she needed to, she command any space. Ben felt a smile creep across his face when Rose whipped open the bathroom door cursing at the fact that they’d been together all this time and she didn’t have a hairdryer. “I’ll be right back. You can have mine.” 

“Don’t bother with it, I want to check her.” Ben insisted. The two could bicker like children.

“She needs to be able to dry her hair, Ben.” She groans as if a man should know this. Rose never looked at Ben as if he was a general representation of a man. If anything he was a dark haired Hux, who she didn’t mind standing toe to toe with. “You can’t just let it go, it’ll turn into a rats nest... and then.. good luck. It won’t be a drier that time, it’ll be a buzzer.”

Rey’s sigh had been heard from the bathroom. “Rose, its really ok. I’ll take a hair tie if you have an extra one,” she says as she enters the room. 

Not another word is shared. Jaina and Rose both nod once at each other to go when Rey focuses on Ben. Proud alphas or not, the girls understand the weight of what just transpired, how dangerous it was for her. 

A rapping knock at their door, stops them in their tracks, “Come on!” Rose whines opening the door. 

Rose’s complaint has Ben ready to pounce, not even having time to check on his girlfriend. As she opens the door she finds Bazine and two officers with her looking to question him since Ben had been forthcoming with so much information about who he believed Andrew was and the devastation that Rey’s already been put through. Of course, Rose didn’t know this, and felt the need to lift her eyebrows in surprise. 

“Hey Baz, they’re over here,” Ben strides across his apartment to get to the box of journals. He pulls the books that suggest his stalking her and all of the entries she’s stressed over it all the way to the attack. 

Bazine takes them, nodding to the other offices to sit. “I won’t take up you’re night, as it’s late, but I need both your accounts on what happened, and I’d like to see the wound your attacker left you.” Rey asks which she’d like first, deciding on the wound. Rey rises to remove her shirt for all to see, shielding her chest of course. Ben hates this idea. Wishing she asked him first. 

Bazine gasps, “And you think...”

“Ben does, and I trust him. I may have been the victim there and just before,” she complains, “but I don’t know much else. The man frightens me. Terribly.”

Bazine and her officers are offered water as Rey recounts the past, and tonight’s fights. Both Rose and Jaina stare at each other, surely they weren’t supposed to be there but, because they intervened, they were witnesses and had to share as well. 

“We were with Kaydel,” Jaina starts, “Andrew had it coming. Rey knew she was in danger and when he grabbed her,” she shakes her head, “no one should be grabbed like that—I don’t care what you’re into in the bedroom, especially not to her. She’s been through enough and suffers for it. So... I excused myself when the bastard followed them out. Rose was close behind. I can see why she always spoke about her.”

Rose warmly holds Rey’s hand. “We saw him stumble around like a wild drunk, but I guess he could smell Solo, since Rey is...” she stops. “Rey, um...Jaina can you smell her?” 

Jaina’s brow furrows, leaning in to hold her wrist, actually being growled at by Solo as if that’s only his job. “Relax guy. I can, but faintly. I’m not sure how much of it is fear, and how much of it is her biological change. “Does anything hurt, Reylo?” She whispers as if to sooth her. 

“Jaina.” Ben warns. 

“Solo.” Jaina returns.

“No...no I just, because were, and I’m being listened to, and not an it and the fight and” she places her hand in Ben’s, “I finally feel safe. It’s been a long time. Honestly, I don’t ever really remember a time where I actually felt safe.” Explaining her past, “I can’t even remember what my parents looked like..” she continues to the present.

“Stress,” Bazine said quietly, “and you’re starting to shed it. You’ll get better and when you do, we’ll be here for you.” With that she looks at Rose and Jaina for the remainder of their information, taking them well into the morning. “If you have anything else to add, you have my number. Solo, I’m making copies of these and I’ll get them back to you when I can.” She assures him he didn’t just give up something precious to him.

Jaina and Rose both say their goodbyes. “Event starts at 10am. Even if you’re too tired to surf, we need you there to present— it was your idea after all. Love you,” Rose and Jaina hugs their friend. 

Ben’s waited long enough, picking her up and bringing her back to the shower, the sand on his skin almost completely gone, rubbed into the chairs and sprinkled all over the floor as it dried on him. “I was so scared for you. I couldn’t move. Are you,” He tries rushing out, “are you ok?” Ben asks gently, wanting to keep her in his arms. 

The time for talking had passed, she could feel it, Rey was changing. In all of her books, those dirty little novels, the thoughts of them were aiding her, ‘thank you Jacen’ she remembered him. Rey stares up at his waiting concern, nodding for allowance, she reaches for him. No wincing as she had done on the beach, instead, she bared her wrists to him against his neck. She knows she’s different now. Even if for just slightly, Rey needs him to know.

Jaina was right, it was faint, but she was changing. Ben chokes out a sob pulling her closer still. “Rey?” Moving her hair, softly behind her, he almost drops her in shock where he stands. If not for her grip she would have clearly...fallen....”Rey, honey, I think you... I think you’re... you should just see it.” 

She didn’t need to, the pain of her glands receding was just about the same as this. Rey smiles up at him. “I know. I feel them.”

The pair laugh nervously, lovingly, assured they’d change her past with a brighter future.


	12. All Together Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everybody surfs. Jaina reveals some background knowledge, and Rey experiences something new.

Dawn came swiftly. Though Rey’s body clock expected her to rise, to power through her usual routine, she did not. Today was different. Today had promise. Rey’s body was changing and though it was destined to take a while to get her physically where she needed to be after the years of dormancy, she was now hopeful. Fear was likely not something she would have to be constantly aware of. Idly she wonders in the comfort of Ben’s weighted arms, if she let him protect her in the first place, if any of this would have ever happened. 

Shifting slightly, nuzzling into his bare chest, she remembers his face, how differently he looked at her between that attack and this one. They’d fought for her freedom from this fear. He didn’t give up on her. Her heart soared at the feeling. To be obviously loved by this man. Her alpha. Hers. She silently sobbed, letting tear after tear pool at his side.

His grip on her had become tighter as if he could sense her change in his sleep. “Sleep, Rey... I’ve got you” He gurgles, barely awake. “You’re safe.”

It’s all it takes.

——-

As the morning presses on, music plays and a steady crowd begins to grow. Food trucks line the streets by the boardwalk again wafting their specials deliciously through the air catching the sea breeze, sending it farther into the beach. It’s as if the smell of Jakku’s delicacies was the key to the city, calling everyone within the nine mile stretch. The Oasis was alive with excitement. Guards that worked late shift were even up, excited for the event. 

Luke was kind enough to shut down the rest of the beach for this, except for miles four and six for anyone that wanted to swim or surf that couldn’t handle ‘Mile 5’. He figured this would be a spectacle and most of the patrons would be watching the star studded group anyway. 

Rey did not disappoint. There had been sponsors setting up all over the beach, looking to sell shirts for the event, broadcasting, no doubt keeping their eyes open to recruiting too. Everyone she called came, and then some. His lips quirked up when he found the beach decorated with flip flops and bags this morning. Not surprised, of course, especially after last night, that neither Rey nor Ben were there that early. Honestly, being an alpha himself, Luke was almost sure that after the threat was gone that she’d go into heat even though the stress could still loom after, the effects of which causing it to be postponed. 

Dr. Johnson and Dr. Tano both were in attendance speaking with him at the guard house. Best to keep them from view as they were obvious to the field. Kaydel was kept on the sand, told that when Rey showed up they would get this going, enjoying Jay Bee getting goofy and dancing to every tune, anxiously waiting to throw down with Rey. Their crew would be reunited soon and back to their usual play. 

Anja spent all morning with Tanal trying to teach Armitage so when they were tired of chasing giants they could sport including him. Lessons had been progressing past kneeling on her long board with her evening him out on the end of it. By the time it was nine, Armitage was able to stand by himself for an entire ride in one direction, which was outstanding. Now all that was left was to get him to turn, and have the determination to do tricks... but that could wait. Anj was besides herself enjoying the the fruits of her labor... and ok, yes the view. Armitage had done so well it was annoying to her to think that he never really tried to keep up with his friends. At least then he could try Mile 5. 

It all stopped mattering as he wiped out at the end of his run, popping up in the bubbles from the last wave crashing at the shore. He’d popped up and looked around, settling on her, who had been sitting on the soft wet sand watching. He smiled noticing this. The water sparkled as the sun shines over head, almost beaming down a path of stars towards her. It’s obvious. He liked her. Movement behind her is the only reason he can look away. Both Ben and Rey have made it to the beach, hand in hand and board on each exterior arm. Armitage makes to leave the water being pummeled by another wave breaking behind him again.

The sun was bright and high, sand raked and warm already on this humid August morning. At first, all Rey can see is Ben. No one else mattered while he held onto her. It was as if she truly came home, and he was in charge of welcoming her back. A smile spread across his face, his girl in his hands. Life couldn’t get better. Even if she could never have a heat, he’d cherish her as if she could.

“This is my beat!” They hear Jaina shout. 

“Oh... boy...” Rey tried hiding behind Ben’s shield of a body. 

Too late. Jain was into all types dancing. The stronger the beat the better it was. It definitely showed when she claimed something was her jam. 

“Come on!“ Jaina’s bubbling meeting tension while grabbing at her wrist. “Relax Solo, it’s a dance... with me...” 

JayBee has gotten on his nerves on and off over the past few days. Not enough to threaten her but he does not take touching her wrist lightly. “That may be so, Jaina, but leave her wrists alone.”

“I’m not a dude Ben. Not interested like that.” She nods at Rey, “Sorry... I know all of this was totally your thing,” she teases. “But dancing with me is like a normal thing — and if we don’t do it now I’m going to make them play it again.”

“JayBee.. oh boy.. just.. wow.. thanks for that first bit,” Rey’s eyes scan low into the sand as if to find anything else to focus on. “Why don’t you join us Ben?” She winked at him knowing full well he was shy and never would. 

He reluctantly followed them taking in the scenery before recognizing the group of them circling up to join. Jaina owned the group. She was the fire that got everyone started, seeing Rey indulge in it made him want to try, or at least stand in the circle. A huge hand fell over the back of his shoulder, tucking in the crook of the opposite side of his frame. At first he tried shrugging it off, but then he noticed the sway in the group. The guy was draped in dreadlocks that bobbed with him as they moved. For the briefest moment he felt like he was being welcomed in like one of the pack. Rey’s pack. Well Jaina’s—That Rey belonged to.

He watched and bobbed with the group as Jaina lead the psych up event, because that must be what it was. She’d call in people to join the circle with her expecting them to take the sandy floor, showing off their best moves before the chorus picked up. Rey practically flew in to join her. Her smile spread wildly stating in step with Jaina, then quickly adding Rose who must have been practicing this morning, which made her smile that much brighter.

As she swished her hips, mimicking the girls, then leading her own step they leaned in to follow. It was a peak into her life. The happier, freeing ones on the road. Ben looked around the group not realizing a tiny hand grabbing at his wrist. Rey’d pulled him in teaching the chorus step. He followed clumsily, blushing profusely. As the song ended, he couldn’t have been more relieved. 

Cheers peeled out of the group, excitedly gearing up when Luke himself patted on the microphone behind them. Ben who had been trying to displace his discomfort and just enjoy Rey’s gesture instead, had himself wondering just how wild this group would be. They took their hype seriously. Then it hit him. Someone had to of recorded that, ‘ugh.’ 

Rey hadn’t dispersed from him, “I’ll teach you. Don’t worry. It looks like a lot but it’s not. If I can, you can.”

Luke had been speaking, welcoming everyone to what they were calling ‘Center Stage 2018.’ “Aside from the pro’s you see before you, is our own hometown hero, Rey Kenobi.” 

An applause with combine hooting and hollering from the solid handful of her good friends Rey started, “Thank you Luke. This event is Jakku’s surfer’s pride and joy. It welcomes regulars and new talent to see if they have the skill to ride every year. Usually, this is an open event to capable adults who travel and seek out Jakku at the Golden Moon Festival for a chance to ride a giant. While that is still open, we have quite the crowd of pro surfers in attendance for one goal,” she nods to Luke again who radio’s inside for both doctors to appear before them in the sand. “To give my hero, the person who showed me women could ride, a second chance at a life she loves as we all do.”

Kaydel starts to speak, unsure of what she’s hearing.

“This event, is a fundraiser for you and everything else we raise will go to athletes that deserve second chances,” she said softly over the microphone. “You inspired me then and again now.” Introducing Dr. Tano and Dr. Johnson, “They’ll be aiding you in your surgery and recovery as soon as you decided you’d like to get bett—“

The breath was knocked out of Rey as Kaydel practically tackled her to hug her, “Is this why you wanted to...?”

“Was the first thing in my mind, after hearing about it and all.” Being hyped up before speaking made all the difference. Rey wasn’t for sappy moments and this shouldn’t be one either. “I know you can’t really get involved but we have a board ready for you if you want to at least paddle out with us.” 

Rose presented her with a custom made balsa wood long board signed by guards and surfers alike, set and sealed so she could still use it. Kaydel couldn’t hardly believe it, joined by Poe, “wow it came out so much better than I thought.”

Kay’s head tilted to the side, “you knew?!”

“Yeah?” he tried dodging her swats. “Are you going to use it or what?”

It turned out he wasn’t the only one hanging on the next few moments, eager to get this thing started. 

She answered like she’d been well abled, “let’s go!” pulling off her jean shorts already in her suit, pushing her board in high under her arm. Cheering and whistles came from all around the beach as everyone made it down into ‘Mile 5’. Guards stuck working today had actually become nervous on the entry. It was the easiest stretch of ocean to guard. While these were capable swimmers, it also meant they had to be on their toes. Guards were stationed on jet skies and a few boats closer to secure a place within the waves in case there was a true emergency. This was Hux’s call, none of which had anything to do with getting closer to Anj. Not at all.

The swim alone had the lot giggling, telling stories as they made it to dive through the walls, “you did this at fourteen?” Complained Jacen. 

“It wasn’t my first time Jay.” Rey laughs at his expression as he drops to his head to his board, a giant rolls underneath the majority of them.

Ben pops up next to them as others make it and wait. 

“Girls? You have your knots?” Jay Bee teases.

Rose just laughs. Mostly at Ben and it’s noticeable. 

“Nah, regular board,” Rey slaps hers. 

“Ezra has yours.” Calls Rose.

“Ezra does not!” Ben splashes at Rose. 

“No, no. Not that. My board remember? Rose don’t mess with him...” Rey paddles to Ezra. No sooner does she that they miss the next few waves, and Luke calls to Ezra to see what the problem was. 

Confirming there wasn’t one, “girls just want Rey to switch boards. No issue. Over.”

Her usual crew had their keys tied around their necks like chokers, Rey instead had already applied them to the board not wanting to confuse Ben any further. Finally back with the crew, alongside Ben and Rose, letting Jaina lead, “Dropping!!” She squealed, which was code for “chase me!” Ten followed including Rose.

Rey didn’t move. Anja and Tanal both dropped in next to them taking the remaining space. “Next one,” Rey leans down into her board, nodding to Ben to drop with her. 

“Is it always crazy surfing with Jaina?”

“She’s a lot... but fun. A party wave is serious shit with her though. She’s gonna be pissy I didn’t go with her.” She paddles.

“Why?”

“It’s just a level of trust we have with each other. If you stay down this time, I’ll show you on the next one.”

They drop in. Rey hovers high instead of dropping all the way into the body of the beast letting Ben get comfortable before she pushes her board low, engaging him. Ben, who thought this was just going to be a usual ride looked all over without losing his balance for her. She was playing with him. Him! Like they used to. Her board now let her land on his momentarily with her feet, fisting the black cord in her hand that the girls referenced as knots.

Rey stood for just long enough to give him a side glance and smirk, pulling her board and her backwards off of the controlled side of his, down into the remaining giant, landing comfortably, and surfing out the remaining ride with him. She’s never done that—only once she rode out with him. Riding out into the soup to excitement filling the mile, he was just about to lay into her about it when he saw how much more prominent her glands were becoming in her excitement. It was the most glorious thing he’d ever seen, aside from her coming back to them that day...

Reserving his thoughts for another time also proved to be the correct move, since as soon as he came back into her view she dove. Dove! Off her board to get to him. Resurfacing to climb onto his board, hugging him tightly to her, “I missed this!” She squealed, and then again once more after a love nip. “Ok. Wait here. You did well but I want to do more with you. You need to see what else we’ve been up to first. Ok?” Another nip in response has her giggling and splashing back at him. 

I few of surfers would wait back with Kaydel out of respect, finding the bigger guy doing the same, Ben introduced himself. “Chewie,” the guy with the dreads offered back. At Ben’s bewilderment of his name, “nickname man.. we all have them. Chewie because of my chewing habit. Straws mostly. Gum sometimes. Anything that’s a good chew really.” He huffs a laugh. 

“So what has she been up to? Did you surf with them?”

“She’s wild. They get each other going. Crazy amount of trust there. And no, usually not. I only came because Jaina’s my girl. We’ve been together for years.”

“Wait but,”

“No mark? I know. Rey’s not the only one looking for her place in this world. Jaina is wild and free—but she was born without glands all together. Shit happens. But she’s the one, whether she can mate me or not.”

Ben stares off in thought. 

“She has a heightened senses even without having her extra bits...she’s all alpha.” He leans down on the board almost ready to paddle out, “for a while there, I thought the twins and Reylo were family. Not even they know their parents. Been looking after each other since they were little too.”

“Did they get tested?”

“I don’t know? That’s not my business man.”

Ben looks to Kaydel who’s processing the same information. She nods once as if to tell him she’d find a way to find out. “They’re up...”

Anja, and Tanal drop in strong, testing each other, ripping wavy stripes right down the wall. Jacen, Jaina, then Rey not far behind zipping between the two of them. Ben blinked for just for a second finding only four, “where?” 

“She’s on Jaina’s board,” Chewie points with his huge tree trunk of an arm.

“How?”

“Rey flies.” He laughs, “don’t blink this time.”

Sure enough Jaina ducks, nearly lying flat, letting Rey dismount with enough force to ensure solid entry back on the wave heading in an unnatural direction well into the barrel. The glassy curtain, thick enough to shield Rey from onlookers from her whip. It was time to hurry on out of it now. Toughness under the board had begun to tempt the board to bail. Giants weren’t really the smartest wave to give up on. They were brick walls to fall into, especially under the barrel. Gritting her teeth, determined not to let this one swallow her whole she dug in, grinding down low to minimize drag, shucking her right out off of the remaining shoulder. Board flying high in the air with her calmly flying with it, despite how alarmed she felt. A hard reconnect later, Ben and her friends all made the same face and, “oooo” sound. 

The five of them surged among each other egging the next on until the wave gave up settling among the clam lagoon in front of it. “You really think they’re related?” Ben questions again as they ride out the remnants. 

“I would put money on it.” Chewie spits before hooting at his girl. 

——-

As much fun as the beast itself is, the group takes turns on and off of it. Getting food, laying out, sleeping, flirting with the staff, surfing the other guarded miles, and so on. The day was full and so were their hearts. Everyone being together reminded Rey of a family she’d always wanted... in one place. 

“Jaina,” Ben asks. 

“Yeah?”

“What’s your last name?” 

She frowns picking at her cheese fries, “why?” 

“Just curious,” he watches Chewie perk up. A chuckle makes his chest jump.

“Kryze,” She licks her fingers from the salt stuck to them, “at least that’s what our papers say.” 

“Kryze like?”

“Yeah, like Kryze-Kenobi, the senator of Mandalor, but we’re just Kryze...mom had us out of wedlock and it was just to complicated to keep us.” She pushed another fry into her mouth, unscathed by what the implications could be. 

“You don’t think Kenobi was your—“

“Father? Could be possible..” she points to Rey, “they did the same to Rey. Here though. At least she was safer here.” 

‘There’s the resentment.’ He thought. 

“We don’t know them more than how to spell the given name... We are our own people. We have each other. And Rey, she’s our family whether there’s a paper that says it or not.” She takes a drink, “if you mate her Solo, you‘re promising this entire family you’ve got her.” Jaina’s alpha emits itself through the space. She smirks, “and I’ll come after you if you don’t.”

Ben shakes his head in response to her boldness, catching Rey speaking with the doctors that had come in. Dr. Tano taking a clear look at her glands in surprise to the regrowth. Feeling the pressing need to be in that conversation, Ben joins her. “Is everything... oh...” he’s hit hard by her scent spike. His body shakes giddily. 

“We’ll have to get you on some suppressants for after... “

Ben interrupts Dr. Tano. “Nope. No suppressants.” His basic language degrading itself with every inhale of his promised mate. “Come on... let’s get you home.”


	13. Awakening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey goes into heat and it is frightening. 
> 
> But Ben is there, so how bad can it be?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goodness gracious! I am so sorry this took so long to get to. I wasn’t sure where I wanted to go with this and I finally figured it out. Thanks for sticking by me 💖 I hope you enjoy it.

[](https://ibb.co/xj20DFb)

Dr. Tano grabs Ben by the shoulder, ignoring his Alpha tendencies of sworn protection to his girl. Ben actually growls at the world known professional, while processing the steps as they materialize in his mind. 

“Do not forget yourself, Alpha. Your Omega is not fully ready for you. Do not mark her until her glands are both the size of quarters.” Dr. Tano bares her teeth at him, giving him the challenge that goes along with the one he’s threatening to give. “If you mark her before she’s ready she will remain infertile and won’t bare any children. It will be your fault.” 

The accusation that he would do such a thing is sobering and refueling at the same time. Through gritted teeth, he does his best to thank her for the information, hauling Rey back to his apartment in the Oasis. 

Even though she’s protested to him carrying her all the way there, Ben does not relent. His girl should not have to move a muscle right now. It’s a show of power. Not over her, but instead that they are one, and that he is undoubtedly hers just as much as she is his.

“My Queen doesn’t have to put her toes in the sand,” he says practically worshiping her as they reach their building. He says such gentle, comforting things to her, making her nuzzle into the crook of his neck. 

“My strong Alpha,” she coos there, sending chills running up his cheek. While he holds her high over his shoulder, she’s managed to curl her body around it to snuggle closer to him. She’s giving into her hormones, needing his constant contact. “I’m so glad it’s you,” she whines trying to hide how stressful these past years were. 

“Don’t hide yourself from me, little one,” he croons into her cheek. “I want to hear you. Tell me everything that comes into your mind. Your Alpha wants you to feel safe. I’ll do whatever it takes, always,” he replies as the elevator finally opens the doors to them. Ben strides in with two long, hurried steps, turning to press the doors closed. Once they finally do he moves to the next to access to his floor number. As they move he says, “I love you, Rey. I always have. And I always will.”

Rey can smell the fear in his admission, as if to say he could be denied at any time. “Ben,” she licks his reddening gland at the side of his neck. She blows out the noticeable need growing between them through her nostrils. “I’ve loved you for years, Alpha. And we’ve been each other’s since I’ve been back.” The ride feels longer in this moment some how while she continues, “I’ll never be another’s,” she says.

Ben’s heart nearly explodes. He’s heard this so many times before, and believed her then too. But now? Whiles she’s entering this more mature part of her development, it is as if she just acknowledged her feelings for him for the first time. He holds her tighter doing his best not to crush her with his strong arms. When the doors finally slide open, he realizes he actually needs to fish out his keys to open his door. Because of this he growls again needing to put her down to get this door open. 

Once it is, he’s back to carrying her. “Do you know anything about what’s supposed to happen to you?” Ben asks.

“A little,” she says, “I learned about it on the road, but never experienced it obviously. Jacen,” she feels him tense at the very thought that another man could have helped her, regardless of the fact that he surely was not an Alpha, or Ben for that matter. “Shh,” she calms him, “They were just the dirty books you seem to enjoy.”

“That’s all you know?” he asks setting her down on their bed. 

“Well, I know I’m not normal or I would have presented already. I’d have gone through it back then, and I’d be matured now. But I feel all of these insecurities surging through me, telling me I won’t be good enough for you, that I’ll never be, and that you’ll get bored and leave.”

He nuzzles into her neck, not opting to undress each other. Air conditioning is helping enough with her tempered skin, and he’s more concerned with their mental health as a couple. Especially, with her impending heat.

Ben remembers his first rut. “Honestly,” he opens up about it, saying, “It was scary.” He feels her tense up like he did. “Calm down,” he reminds her, kissing her shoulder. “Not everyone is the same, and you’re not an Alpha, so it might be different for you. Okay?”

Rey nods and let’s him explain his first time. 

“Before you even think it, I was alone. I haven’t had a partner for this, ever, until now. With you.”

Her skin grew warmer while she accepted being his first. It lit something inside her knowing this. Rey presses her crown up under his chin, trying to gain his scent wherever she can. She wanted to be covered, wrapped in it like a blanket, and the action couldn’t make him any more proud.

“Like you, I didn’t have mine at puberty. You were too young, and I wasn’t interested in you like that yet, for the record, so you don’t think I was bing creepy’.” Ben checks over her shoulder to see a widening smile, so he continues. “They have this drug now, prescription of course, that my mother actually made sure I took before I turned eighteen so I wouldn’t be stunted by not having one.” I had to have at least one to start the male growth hormone that basically turned me into that gangly kid you remembered, to what I am now.”

Rey makes a small noise promising him that he didn’t need it. She promised he was all she ever needed, regardless his size. “I didn’t think you were scrawny. You were perfect then as you are now. I love the way you hold me,” she admits. “I feel protected when you’re near me, when you hold me like this, my heart sings.” 

“I,” his throat seems to constrict as he tries to speak. Maybe now wasn’t the time for a first time story. Maybe she’d say yes to the most important question he would ever ask her. Maybe it is just time.

Rey rolls to her side to face him, already upset with herself for the lack of contact, but she needs to see his gentle eyes. “Ben?” she asks him noticing his hand fishing around in pocket, and then connects with what she turned to see. Her man trying desperately not to show fear and weakness, “Alpha? What’s wrong?”

Ben feels the tremors of nerves course through him when he pulls the tiny blue velvet box from his pocket. She watches his face while he opens the lid with the corner of his index finger’s nail. Rey discovers it when she realizes his vision is no longer pointed at her. 

Inside the box is a marble sized stone she’s never seen before, perched high around a setting of both citrine and aquamarine stones that represent day and night to Ben, but something far more important individually. The band itself is white gold because he felt the stones he chose should stand out as she does to him. 

“I wanted to do this on the beach tonight, under the golden moon,” he swallows, “but some how, curled up with you now, just seems right.” 

Rey covers her hands around his wrists, stroking his pulse underneath with her thumbs. Her eyes are wide, in awe of this man. 

“Rey, ever since I met you,” his nerves started to kick in straining his voice every so often. “You’ve been there for me. You let me take care of you. And you’re returned the favor so many times. When you left, I felt like a part of me died, and I promised myself if you ever came back, I’d never let you go. When you did I thought this couldn’t ever have happened. That you’d disappear again. But you stayed. And you chose me.” He closes his eyes to try to quell his forming tears. “I want to be yours forever. I want to protect you, be there for you, have a family, a future with you, everything... with you. Please? Please let me be your Alpha,” he barely makes out his last few words. 

Rey lets out a puff of air she’s been holding in since he started talking. Particles of spit accidentally fly with it and hit his cheek, lifting his vision back to her. He sees the emotion straining over her features. Her face is painted with streams of fresh tears. Rey tries sniffling up her constant running nose to no avail, but she’s the furthest from sadness she’s ever been in her life. She has the decency to wipe his face and apologize for what hit him though.

As he leans over her waiting for her answer, she cradled is cheek in her palm. “Ben,” she finally speaks softly. Her eyes widening as she confirms, “Yes! You have always been my Alpha.” Rey pulls him in to her, pressing loving kisses onto his lips, letting out little sobs as she releases and encourages more of this. “Always...” she sniffles again, “Until death do us part.”

Ben’s heartbeat hammers in his ears, she gave him a yes, a definitive, obvious yes. She even promised no separation, like a true mate would. “You make me so happy, Rey,” he croaks, holding onto her as if she’s his last lifeline pulling him ashore.

Moments pass as they’ve entangled with each other’s embrace when Ben feels Rey’s skin dampen. His eyes widen, sitting up quickly to find the small blue box. 

“Rey?” He asks for her left hand, sliding her ring onto her finger slowly, as if to get her to focus on what message he’s trying to give her. “I can’t mark you this time. Your glands are too small.”

Rey covers them with her hands immediately feeling insecure. 

“No, no little Omega,” he soothes. “They’re beautiful, just like you. But Dr. Tano said they have to be bigger before I can or I’ll hurt you.” He presses his forehead to hers. “But you can mark me, and I’ll wear it proudly.” Rey rewards him with a nuzzle, tucking her head under his chin. “As for your mark, I will as soon as you’re ready—but for now, if you ever feel like you need a reminder as to who you belong with, your mark is right here, on your finger.”

Rey kisses him softly, taking on her unending changes. “Tell me what they mean, Ben. You’ve always been so deep. I know you have a reason for them specifically. Please?” she whispers.

Ben reaches for his phone retrieving the notes on each one. He points to them as reads it straight from the phone:

“Aquamarine is calming, soothing, cleansing; it inspires truth, trust, letting go, good luck, fearlessness and protection. They’re also considered to hold eternal youth and happiness.

Citrine is a spiritual healing and balancing energy.

Zawadi Sapphire is a natural gemstone from Jakku with a rare golden sheen. A true ‘gift from the earth’. The Sapphire embodies unique beauty, genuine rarity and everyday durability.”

“You nailed it then,” she thumbs over the sapphire, feeling the smooth stone underneath her pad. “This is us, just as naturally as we are now,” Rey tries to stifle her yawn. The emotional rollercoaster this week was, is finally catching up with her slowing their celebration of her decision. 

“Sleep, sweetheart. I’ll be here. I won’t ever leave you.”

His promise tucks her in as if it was a physical reassurance sending her off to dreamland. Even though she finds rest, she still doesn’t dream. She never seems to when she’s with Ben. She knows where she is, who she’s with, why she’s there so her mind leaves a clean slate for her to wake up to every morning.

Rey shivers through the night needing every blanket she can find laid over top of her. Ben’s quick thinking has everything that could possibly cover her, including all of the towels he owns over their place in the bed. It feels as though he invested in several weighted blankets when he tries to pull up the layers to get back under. 

“Ben?” Rey’s question comes out as a whine.

“I need you to tell me what you feel, Rey. Your Alpha needs your help. Identify it, sweetheart.” Ben knows her sounds, her little gestures that usually promise her desire, but this is all new. He’s aware of how much bigger he is than her, as he’s always been, but now lying together in the shifting hormonal tide, he feels as if he’s grown. 

“Rey,” he presses his concern of his changing senses, as if he can will them out of his system. Just the practice, coupled with actually being able to smell her is maddening. His eyes cross and his body screams protests as he tries to will it away.

Rey shivers. “I don’t feel good” is clearly not what he means. She squeezes her eyes shut tight, listening to what it is. All of her nerve endings pierce her as they fire off, burning her as they do. Heat builds under her skin as if it is actually on fire. Her airway constricts while her cells ignite. Rey struggles as if she’s swallowing smoke from that very fire, choking when she tries to breathe.

Ben panics seeing her struggle. He throws the layers off of her, even though her skin prickles with goosebumps. He pulls her flush against him feeling her burning skin reddening his own. For once in his life, he’s thankful for the thick guard shirts Luke was so determined to get at the start of each season. 

Ben, though, is absolutely frightened by what he sees. He always thought heats were fuck fests with an over anxious mate to see out all of his sexual fantasies with and knot repeatedly. He shakes his head, trying not think immaturely about it. Rey’s eyes roll around in her head and back, trying to control her consciousness. He finally formulates the word, figuring out what her body is actually doing. She looks like a rag doll. It’s terrifying... she isn’t even able to hold onto him. 

For a second he considers calling Dr. Tano to help him understand what’s happening to her. Her body jolts around him as he moves. ‘Being in heat must be awful,’ he thinks to himself. 

A whisper calls him back to refocus on her. “Help me, Alpha,” she whines. It’s almost a sob. Her mind drifts to those stupid books Jacen gave her that she never wound up using for what he advised them for. Not presenting early put her at a disadvantage. 

Her entire body threatens her, shutting down her senses, one by one, until she faintly hears him say, “I’m sorry.” Rey’s unaware that he’s discarded their clothing, or that he’s pressing his broad body against hers. It’s not until he’s pushed deep into her core that she feels something inside of her awaken. It’s glorious; like dawn has finally risen after years hidden in an eternal night. 

She feel as if her conscious self has been sucked inside of her to watch her transformation. There, a world seems to be recreated. It’s natural and freeing; a slight breeze picks up cooling her senses and as the place of zen is found, so is her innermost being. Her Omega. 

The being looks celestial, transparent, with a golden light that pulses within her. Rey assumes it’s her heart, or she’s the protector of her actual soul. She stands in awe at the sight. Does every Omega see this? 

_“Just you,”_ she answers. _“Just you.”_

“Who are you?” Rey asks.

_“I’m your inner most consciousness. Your Omega. I guide you with your relationship decisions.”_

Rey’s face scrunches, trying to accept this, asking, “Can you? Can you elaborate —on that?”

If the omega smiles, it’s faint. Her light is beginning to blind Rey’s consciousness. 

_“My voice carries through your mind to praise you when you’ve done well, to scold you when you’ve wronged him, and to keep your mind centered with your needs and his,”_ she replies.

As the light takes over, she adds, _“We are one. We will be fine. Now, answer your Alpha’s call.”_

The temperature change is sudden as her Omega’s light completely takes over, waking Rey from the trance she was in. Her eyes snap open, searching for Ben’s. As he comes in to focus, she can feel his knot expanding her. Her body accepting him, and the joy it brings her. On her second inhale she remembers him telling her to mark him. Rey’s Omega keens at the thought, guiding her to sink her teeth right into his sweet spot, and so she does. 

_Good girl. Listen to him. He loves you and now you are bonded._

“Rey?” Ben’s strangled moan calls through his apartment loudly. He’s sure people outside can hear him, but it’s a fleeting thought as he realizes Rey is marking him. “I thought...” he begins to sob, “I thought... I was losing you.”

_Seal his wound, Omega. Seal the bond._

Faintly, Rey can hear a clicking sound on a phone, as if someone hung up. Her brow furrows but tucks her questions away as she smooths over the ridges of her bite mark. Lap after lap, with her broad flat tongue seems to slow Ben’s breathing. He sputters another load inside of her where they’re joined. Her inner being revels in it, sending shockwaves and her own release, reassuring him that this is what she needed. 

“You,” Ben tries to collect his thoughts, “I thought you were dying,” he says. “I was so scared.” 

Rey cups his cheek, wiping a falling tear from his soft skin. She soothes him saying, “But I didn’t. Ben, you saved me. How did you know what to do?”

“I didn’t,” he admits. “I panicked and called Jacen. He and Dr. Tano were on the line guiding me through this.” Ben tries to hide his embarrassment under a shake of his mane. His dark hair hides his eyes as he peers behind his sweat drenched locks.

Rey tucks them back behind his ear saying, “You don’t need to hide from me. You’re my mate. I’m not going to judge you.” 

_Yes. That made Alpha happy. Again. Do it again. Call him what he is._

“When Dr. Tano chalked your reaction up to being normal, Jacen read the journals you wrote to Rose,” he says, nuzzling into her fiery red glands. He suckles the sweet, raised place on her neck as if it were candy. “I cannot believe what girls talk about.”

Her laugh soothes him. The wonderful sound rings through him and the space in his apartment almost stopping time entirely. “I’m so happy you’re home, Rey,” he says as his knot deflates. “That you’re safe, and best of all,” he says as he tries to look at his favorite feature, “You’re my mate.”

“Your’s,” Rey nods. “Always yours, always,” she repeats.

——-

Since the moment her awakening started, Rey’s Heat kept the pair guessing, not entirely sure of what she absolutely needed and when until the third day. Ben and Rey are finally in sync with each other. Rey can understand that the prickling heat is a warning sign. It’s there to tell her to join with her mate, and that their connection will level out her temperature, and fix everything.

She learns about setting off his rut, and how much she loves that side of him. She loves how his rich scent absorbs into every single one of her pores. It’s thick in the air and encourages her on. 

Rey notes that every book she’s ever read from Jacen’s collection has been spot on, or extremely close to what heat is actually like. Her Omega keens over how well she’s doing as she learns every one of his sounds. She complements him, speaking to every one of his needs, fulfilling him as he sees her through this. When her heat breaks and she’s coming down from her high, she notices another change. 

“Ben?” Rey finally tries out his name again after a solid seventy two hours of begging for his care by his designation. 

He replies sleepily with a humming sound as he lays his head over her chest, lightly thumbing over her nipple, as if it were a toy.

“Can you check my glands again?” She asks even though she knows she asked not even twenty minutes before, trying to keep her smile in check.

Ben tries not to roll his eyes when he hears her. He looks up at her neck and pressing his thumb onto the raised area. “Not yet, sweetheart—but they are bigger,” he says sensing her frustration, he adds, “I’ll be able to in your next heat for sure.”

Just hearing him say it makes her smile, “I look forward to it, Alpha.”

“Me too, my mate.”


End file.
